Lecturing and Listening

The typical stereotypes of communication are that women talk more than men, that is not necessarily true. For example, Tannen states, “...another explanation is that men think women talk to much because they hear women talking in situations where men would not: on the telephone; or in social situations with friends, when they are not discussing topics that men find inherently interesting, or; like the couple at the women’s group, at home alone-in other words, in private speaking” (Cooper and MacDonald 11). Men and women have two different conversational styles, different ways of talking. They also have different ideas of what is important and what is not. For example, Tannen points out that the man thought it wasn’t important that his friend was getting married, but the woman had thought that it was important (Cooper and MacDonald 12).

The first difference is how they listen to people talking. Women love to make “listener noises such as ‘mhm,’ ‘uhuh,’ and ‘yeah.’” They do this to show “I’m with you” (Tannen332). On the other hand, men listen in silence. When men are silent it usually is because they are trying to interpret the information. Another reason for a men’s silence is when they go into their “cave” because they are upset or stressed. Women misinterpret a man’s silence and they imagine horrible things such as “he hates me, he doesn’t love me, he is leaving me forever.” A women’s silence means what she’s about to say is going to hurt them or she doesn’t want to talk to them. If they can realize they have different ways of communicating then there wouldn’t be many worries or

Deborah Tannen’s essay “But What Do You Mean?” focuses on what she claims are differences between men and women when it comes to social interaction. The essay is sectioned into seven categories, in which she talks about how men and women tend to think and react when it comes to apologizing, criticizing, thanking, fighting, praising, complaining, and joking with others. In general, she seems to promote the idea that women tend to be more polite and refined, considering the feelings of others when conversing and taking everything as a formality. In contrast, men are apparently more blunt, taking a more direct approach with matters and being more unconcerned with how they may affect others. Women tend to automatically apologize and thank others

Body language is “the conscious and unconscious movements and postures by which attitudes and feelings are communicated” (Merriam-Webster 's online dictionary, 2016). We may study the way body language affects people’s actions, such as knowing when a person is in love,

Men and women speak the same language, but there are multiple speculations that women talk differently compared to men. Women are constantly seen as super talkative, while men try to control conversations. Deborah Cameron, a professor of language at Oxford University, wrote an essay titled, “What Language Barrier?” where she discusses the similarities and differences men and women have when they talk. Cameron begins her essay by stating women and men do not communicate differently, she claims, “The idea that men and women ‘speak different languages’ itself has become dogma” (Cameron 268). Cameron believes there are no differences in the way males and females talk and she continues to prove her claim by using examples of the female/male brain, power between sexes, and research. She essentially discusses the biological and social reasons why we talk and how gender does not matter when communicating. She concludes the folk-belief that women talk more than men is only a social prejudice; therefore, it depends on each person whether they talk more or less (Cameron 267-273). I disagree with Cameron, the dogmas that women are more talkative and men are controlling are true because there is a difference in empathy, power, and topics that allow us to become better in different areas when having conversations.

Due to the different ways of expressing politeness and conversational involvement, they may have trouble communicating even if they share the same language. The ‘two cultures' approach proposes that talk between women and men is fraught with potential misunderstanding for much the same reasons that communication across the ethnic groups is (Mary Crawford, Talking Difference On Gender and Language, 1995). Hence, I agree with the point of view of Deborah Tannen. However, "You just don't understand: Women and men in conversation" does not inform readers about the reasons and the consequences of the communication differences between genders. Therefore, this essay will include the above

Male and female differ in their use of communication because their reasons for communicating are different. Men

In order to be able to solve some of the problems associated with gender miscommunications, we should distinguish first between the two different types of communications: verbal communication and nonverbal communication. Verbal communication consists of messages expressed by linguistic means such as the use of intonation, the specific words we choose to say, and the way we are saying them. There are differences in females and males usage of language/verbal communication. As we might expect from traditional sex-role stereotypes, girls tend to establish more egalitarian same-sex groups. Girls use friendly groups as a training ground for cooperation. Boys view friendly conversation among their friends as training for verbal aggression. Females are more verbal, use three times more amount of words than males, they are much more descriptive and use more adjectives. Women are less direct in their communication style. As Prof. Tannen showed in one of her research, women are more indirect in answering questions depends on the situation. They answer questions the way they would like to be answered by men, which means more than just a yes/no answer. However, men answer the way they would like to be answered

This causes women to become more vocal. Tannen suggests that status affects many different ways in which men communicate and raises several different examples. One area she found was that men tell more stories and jokes than women. She suggests that they are not doing this to be funny but instead do it to again to negotiate status. They often tell stories in which they are the heroes and act alone to overcome obstacles. While women use storytelling to gain support from her personal networks. They use their stories that, if they are the subject of, contain her doing something foolish to put her at the same level as the listener. In this way women are not concerned with status as with relating and gaining support. Men and women also differ when they are listening. While women tend to use eye contact and head nods to let the speaker know that she is listening. Men often do not use these techniques because they suggest agreement with the speaker. Women also a technique which Tannen calls cooperative overlap. This happens sometimes when women start to speak before the other person finishers speaking. They usually do this to agree and show support for what the speaker is saying. Women see cooperative overlap as a way to continue the conversation while men see it as a competitive ploy to gain control of that conversation. In this way communication again is not made clear, men are annoyed because they believe that

There exists a disparity in the communication phenomenon between men and women. This disparity according to scholars can be attributed to the male dominance in the society today and relationship tensions between couples. A study on cross-sex conversations showed that, when men and women engage in a friendly conversation, they do so as equals but they do not play the same roles in the communication. Women tend to ask more questions and likely to utter utterances that encourage responses from the other speaker. Men, on the other hand, are more likely to interrupt their partner’s conversations and make direct opinions and facts to control or dominate the conversation. Thus, the communication phenomenon between men and women is strikingly distinct.

This research paper focuses on the gender differences at work and their communication styles. It discusses the manner in which men and women take in communicating to others. It is viewed that men are no longer the power house of communication. Research will indicates that in group settings, not one gender type dominates the conversation, but the one who shows leadership is determined to have power. In addition, studies indicate that men are less intuitive than women because women express nonverbal communication with great sensitivity.

Deborah Tannen is the author of the book You Just Don't Understand where she analyzes the different meanings of communication between men and women. Her research shows that women and men use the same words and phrases and yet can interpret and react to those same words and phrases differently. Tannen compares the two sexes to find men use their conversation as a type of competition or to preserve their independence. For example, men talk about their knowledge regarding sports, cars, women, exc. Meanwhile, women try to foster intimacy through communication. For instance, women often talk and relate on a personal level. Throughout Tannen's book she uses "cross-cultural communication" to describe the differences between the language of

It is important to be aware of the differences between men and women in the art of nonverbal communication. Knowing these differences can be helpful in understanding why a person is doing a particular action and what it means. As was previously noted, women are more openly emotional and intimate so the body language they use and the reason they use it will be different from the man, who tends to be more reserved with emotional manners. Females are usually more expressive than men and are more likely to return a smile. They do not use as many gestures as men unless they are trying to gain approval from someone, but will usually opt for playing with their hair or clothing or placing their hands in their lap in social situations. Men, on the other hand, do not smile as much as women. They do use more gestures than females, such as sweeping arm and hand motions, in conversation. (West Virginia Department of Education) Males and females also use different body language in the realm of

According to Deborah Tannen, a linguistic professor of Georgetown University, men and women talk differently and sometimes it might be very complex as she stated that many coupes 'grew in diverse cultures.' Men consider communication as a primary language of 'report.' They feel more

Communication had its verbal and nonverbal understandings, but they also have their misunderstandings. Body language has industrialized itself with different types of language that were brought up by the society. Men and women weren’t use to these body languages towards the similar gender. Miscommunication has been a problem when dealing with these differences. Men and women continue to build body languages that only made sense to themselves and not to the opposite gender. Although one defeats the other in a