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Leonore Verster
What happens when a narcissist gets an ultimatum to shape up or ship out?
Leonore Verster
Leonore Verster, worked at National Symphony Orchestra
Answered just now

I have yet to meet a narcissist who will actually “shape up” and stay that way. My experience was with my ex-husband, and since we had children, this process you are describing took a few years to play out.

So here goes: If there is an image to uphold (e.g. the perfect family or trophy wife), he will promise to work on the relationship and whatever else is expected, and then go on to tell friends and family that he is doing this. It can be used to win sympathy, and even to make others believe you were exaggerating about how bad things
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