Lily In It Ends With Us By Colleen Hoover

Once Lily accepts what she has done and learns that her mother's death did not make her a bad person, her conflict can finally be resolved. As a result of resolving her conflict, she is able to mature because of the struggle, just like other people are able to grow and evolve from their own mistakes. This is evident when she admits "Before coming here, my whole life had been nothing but a hole where my mother should have been, and this hole had made me different, left me always aching for something, but never once did I think what he'd lost or how it might've changed him" (Kidd 293). Lily finally realizes that her mother's death has not only affected her, but also her father, T. Ray, and the calendar sisters. Through the course of Lily's struggle, Lily learns a lot about life and matures into a wiser

Lily starts off stuck living in an unloving, abusive household and decides to free herself from the negative atmosphere that she had been living in her whole life. Lily is perpetually abused by her father. He forces her to kneel on Martha White's, gets exasperated every time she speaks, and yells at her for no reason. Lily is not the only one noticing the terrible treatment, Rosaleen does too. Once after Lily had to kneel on the Martha White's Rosaleen said to her, “Look at you, child. Look what he’s done to you” (Kidd 25). Noticing the unloving treatment Lily gets, Rosaleen knew that their household was demoralizing place for Lily to be in, which is why she didn’t question when Lily when she later runs away. Lily one day realizes she needs to do something about her horrible life at home. While sitting in her room she hears a voice in her

Lily’s isolation time in T-Ray’s house and the death of her mother causes her to yearn for a motherly figure. The fact that T-Ray meanness overwhelms his fatherly figure and the fact that Lily killed Deborah causes Lily to look for someone or something that can provide her the same affection as a motherly figure. Thus, every time T-Ray becomes mean to Lily, Lily uses her mother’s items as a replacement for a motherly figure. She says, “I felt the wooden picture of black Mary underneath my waistband. I felt the waxed paper with my mother’s picture inside and her gloves stuck to my belly, and it seemed all of a sudden like my mother was there, up against my body, like she was bits and pieces of insulation molded against my skin, helping me absorb all his meanness” (24). Lily’s action to use Deborah’s items as a fictional motherly figure shows that she still feels the guilt over what she did to Deborah. Consequently, Lily is chained to her past.

When a parent dies, any child will cling to the other parent for emotional support and comfort for dealing with such a loss. In Lily’s case, she wanted her fathers support more than anything but he was cold, abusive, and stuck in the past, that he wasn’t able to give her anything except for take his anger out on her, when she disobeyed him. Although if someone does not get that support from the other parent, and if someone else is there that is understanding and kind, its amazing to see how much you can start to really rely on them and grow a close relationship. When Lily deals with the loss of her mother and the poor treatment of her father, she doesn’t know what to do with herself, she has a load of all different kind of emotions, and it really harms her well-being. Lily deals with guilt because she has visuals that she was the one that killed her mother, and on top of that she has her father telling her that her mother left her and she just abandoned her, making Lily feel unimportant and then at the same time guilt. Rosaleen is the closest role model that Lily has for a mother, Rosaleen cares and sticks up for Lily but Lily doesn’t really have the mother-daughter connection with her. Although Rosaleen provides comfort for Lily, she helps her with her father and in return Lily defends Rosaleen as well as save her life from the hospital after she got beaten.

She is expressed as dealing with “teenage problems” if I do say so myself a lot of issues that most teenagers have: identity, popularity, self-consciousness, and parental issues. The 14-year-old throughout her story feels a deep sense of longing for her mother as she did not know her, because she died when Lily was only 4 years old. In Chapter 1, Lily talks about how she misses her mother, and how she feels completely responsible for the fact that she doesn't have her. This quote, "This is what I know about myself. She was all I wanted. And I took her away," is significant to the whole plot, because it helps us understand one of Lily's main concerns and desires. I myself have lost a parent at a very young age, and struggled to comprehend what happened, and how it would effect me through the course of my life. Lily Owens notices that she does not fit and is held back from that fact that her father does not care about Lily's life nor her needs. In Chapter 1, Lily indicates that she is “..worried so much about how I [she] looked and whether I [she] was doing things right, I [she] felt half the time I [she] was impersonating a girl instead of really being

T. Ray had not stopped at tearing her down physically, for he had the strong desire to hack away at what is left of her mental state. By painting such a scarring image of Deborah next to the one Lily made with optimism and fondness, T. Ray’s mirage overshadowed Lily’s impression. This causes her to leave him and start a new chapter in her life. T. Ray’s bestial actions were crucial reasons that influenced Lily’s decision to leave her father and begin her pathway through the perplexing road of her mother’s life.

This quote relates to lily because she lost her mother but the love for her from many other mother figures never ended. Lily always thought that she was never loved because of her cruel father but she had so many people with her like rosaline she was lily's first mother figure, she took care of her by showing love to her when her father was mean to her. The Other mother figures are august and may, june was not actually a mother figure for lily but instead she resembled lily in a way that made lily realize how she was, like when june tried to hide her feelings about neil, lily does the same for the black marry. August was a great mother figure because she gave time to lily to open up and tell the truth even though she knows that lily is

DocViewer Page of 3 Zoom Pages In the beginning of the book Lily’s relationship with her parents was not really good , she really did not know her mother all she knew was the horrifying confusing accident that happened when she was only four years old. All Lily remembered about her mother was when her mother was fighting with T. Ray and she was packing all of her clothes , going in and out of the closest and seeing T.Ray yelling at her mom. Lily also remembered that she saw a gun on the floor and Lily grabbed it and shot her mother on accident.

Luckily for Lily, she comes upon the Boatwright sisters once she reaches Tiburon. Because of the fact Lily does not have anyone to share her love with, she is compelled to stay and live with the Boatwrights. At one point in the novel, Lily and August are having a conversation when August asks Lily “What else do you love Lily?”(Kidd 39). Lily then thinks to herself, “No one had ever asked me that before. What did I love? Right off the bat I wanted to say that I loved the picture of my mother…but I had to swallow that back”(39). Lily does not feel comfortable enough yet that she says, “ I love writing poems, just give me something to write, and I’ll love it” despite the fact that Lily really loves August (39). She loves August so much that she would rather stay in Tiburon with the Boatwrights than be with her own father T. Ray. The loss of Deborah results in Lily going to obtain love somewhere other than her own home. This is also why Lily takes Rosaleen with her. Rosaleen is a black nanny who used to work on T. Ray’s farm. She has been there for Lily in the past but she cannot always be there one hundred percent because of her race. Due to Deborah’s death, Lily does not have a mother figure, however, he journey to Tiburon with Rosaleen proves to be a success as she finds the Boatwrights and strengthens her relationship with her nanny, Rosaleen.

Even though Lily lived with an abusive parent, and her father and after all she wasn't a very bad kid to have a life she had. In the book and in the movie Rosaleen gets beat up by a group of racists men while she was voting and gets sent to jail for affronting them.Lily did all she could to took her out of jail they both ran away to be safe in a place.Although in my opinion i think Rosaleen was being good to Lily because she liked her as her daughter and everything and their relationship between them was good to me in my circumstances .Lily’s mother passed away when she was young and she didn't have no one around except for Rosaleen so she was the only female to be around Lily that was influenced in her life since she was a little girl.Lily pretty much grew up without a mother and that was pretty hard for her during her childhood but now it’s even harder because it’s getting at a point where she is going to leave the childhood to start being a young adult and mature, And it would be hard for her because she doesn’t have a mother to guide her to that path where she doesn't need to be maintained and guided to a specific point in life although thats why Rosaleen was there for but it won't feel the same for her as another kid unless she takes it that

Lily made her own decisions when she did not allow her father, T.Ray, to abuse her by running away from home according to the text, “In a matter of seconds I knew exactly what I had to do-leave” (Kidd 41). Running away from home to find a better life is a common action in coming of age movies and novels, one example would be Ella Enchanted. When Lily decides to run away

Lily learns that her father was once madly in love with her mother, but they

At the beginning of the book Lily perceives her parents differently from one another. T-ray is seen as a mean cold hearted man who shows no affection towards Lily. “You wake me up again Lily, I’ll get out the Martha Whites, you hear me?” (pg. 5) The Martha Whites was a punishment T-Ray came up with, he would make Lily kneel on dried oats until her knees bled. Lily’s Mom, which she killed when she was four was perceived as this angel watching over her and always out to protect Lily. Lily was overrun with so much guilt when she killed her mother that is caused her to lose her connection with life. When she started living with the Boatwright sisters she reconnected with life and realized and found out who her parents really were. She learned that she was an accident, her mother ran away from her and T-Ray to stay with August and the sisters, but she learned that her mother tried to make things up and she went to go retrieve Lily but got killed. T-Ray near the end of the novel hallucinates at the boatwright house and sees Lily as his dead wife. “You’re not leaving me again Deborah!” Lily realizes that T-Ray actually cares about her and leaves her alone with August. Lily’s perceptions of her parents were changed when she found out who they actually are.

Instead of relying on another power that is above her, she takes her fate into her own hands and tries to save her own home. This self reliance develops early, and can also be seen much later in her life. When she is twenty-seven, Lily learns that her husband has a secret second family. She leaves him immediately and manages to annul the marriage. Although he had taken all of her money from their joint bank account, she does not go back to her parents in Arizona or try to find another husband to take care of her. Instead, she begins preparing for her future alone. “Since I obviously couldn't count on a man to take care of me, what I needed more than ever was a profession. I needed to get my college education and become a teacher . . . the time flew by, and when both the dispensation and the acceptance letter arrived, I had enough money for a year of college” (p. 90). Instead of wondering what to do and moping about her ex-husband, Lily is practical and knows what she wants to do next. She also mentions that she cannot depend on a husband to take care of her. If she did not have to fend for

Her father is described as a neutral figure and her memory of him is hazy at best. This lack of a father figure led to Lily’s attitude towards men. Because of this Lily always denies herself suitable marriages because she always feels she can do better. Lily is conflicted between the man she loves and the man with money. She loves Seldon but she deems him too poor for her perfect marriage. After much thought, Lily decides to marry Peter Gryce who is exceedingly wealthy but is too late as he is already engaged at the time of her decision. Lily cannot decide between love and money both of which are important aspects of her life. She is unwilling to compromise between the two which eventually leads to her downfall. Lily needs to marry a man with wealth and a stable status in high New York society because she needs a source of income to supplement her own unstable wealth.