Love Marriage Is Better Than Arrange Marriage

In North America, people will argue that love needs to happen before marriage but, historically, this is actually a very new notion. Mr. Smolinsky was in shock when his daughters wanted to marry for love. He asked his wife if they even looked at each other before the engagement and she replied, “’Maybe if I had the sense of my daughters in America, I would have given you a good look over before the wedding’” (76). This implies that if she had the choice, she would have married for love or perhaps a different man at least.

Having two people in love and getting married can change a lot about both lives. Lifestyles will change and adapting to each other will be one of the major goals. Not being able to adapt to each other will cause stress and great pain to each other. The key to marriage is being able to withstand each other and having patience for each other. Marriage in the twenty-first century today lacks the skills of withstanding each other and patience, especially couples who get married at an early age. A perfect marriage is to marry a person who loves you for who you are and what you are, not for you to be different or to change. “The best life partner might, I think, be the one who sees you as you are and loves that person-the person who is boring and anxious or blotchy from a weekly scrub mask-not the imaginary one who is poetic and broodingly smart and sexy and ecstatic all the time” (Miller 64). This statement wrote by Catherine Newman clearly shows that a couple getting married should pick that right partner that choose you because of you and nothing different. If you choose a partner to be different or act different and not for what he/she truly is, you will guaranteed to have a hard and stressful marriage. Both of you will have trouble understanding each other and it will cause you to have therapy. Marriage therapy is very common today and one the reason of them is not loving your partner for who he/she really is. Marrying somebody can be easy, but finding the right somebody is hard. It may take more than one try to find that right

     Moreover, the essential idea of marriage is that to create a healthy relationship that there must be a bond of love as well as maintaining their own identities. The converging of two individuals cause tension and usually end up in conflict. When two parents disagree either one of them gets hurt or a child feels it is their fault and responsibility.

Also, this type of marriage is chosen because of social status. A rich family will want their heir to marry into a family that is worth their status. And lastly, very religious and cultural son and daughters will just agree to an arranged marriage because of the way they have been brought up since childhood and they know that they will not have to worry about their parents of not approving or rejecting of their choice of spouse.

If one does not require a marriage for their love to grow or even transpire, then why do it at all and for what purpose? With a look at “The Arranged Marriage” by

In “The Radical Idea of Marrying for Love.” Stephanie Coontz describes marriage as an “institution that brings together two people.” she shares the point that “marriage should be based on intense, profound love and a couple should maintain their ardor until death do them part” (p. 378).

Marriage has been a heated controversy for the past few years because people often marry for the wrong reasons. Anyone who thinks of an ideal marriage would think of two people loving each other and sharing a personal bond or goals together. Marriage is regularly defined as the legally or formally recognized union of two lovers as partners in a personal relationship. This definition remarks there is an actual connection between two people in marriage, but do people actually consider this when committing to “love” and “support” their partners forever? As research and studies have shown, people ultimately get married for many reasons, except love. This philosophy can be easily applied to the short poem, “Marriage” by Gregory Corso. In this emotional poem, the author argues marriage is more effectively understood or known for culture and convenience rather than through the abstract considerations of love. Here, we can identify people generally decide to marry for the incorrect reasons, for instance the story of the author himself. Corso finds himself confused multiple times, wondering if he should marry to not be lonely, for tradition and for his physical and mental health. He disregards love, a relationship or a connection with his future wife. General ways of convenience like loneliness, health and economic status between cultural stereotypes and religion are usually the true reasons of why people chose to have the commitment of marriage with another person.

Marriage is an important event in a person’s life. From the old nursery rhyme, First comes love, then comes marriage, couples take the big step when they feel the quality of the relationship has reached the next level. Relationship

In Claudia Kolker’s book The Immigrant Advantage, she talks about the cultural tradition of arranged marriages brought by South Asian immigrants to the United States. Kolker agrues that arranged marriages are much more effective in finding a spouse than traditional marriages. Kolker believes that this tradition of assistive marriage should be adopted by Americans. Research and studies have shown that “women in arranged marriages rated the highest marital status” (Kolker, 71) compared to couples who have arranged marriages. Arranged marriage is great for individuals who are ready to settle down and start their own life without wasting any time finding a partner. Arranged marriage saves a great amount of time on dating people who are not compatible with your personality or beliefs. As Kolker states, assistive marriage does not just save time in finding a lifelong partner but, it also leads to exceptional happiness between the couple than a traditional marriage reported by couples during studies. Traditions brought by immigrants such as, assistive marriage should be considered by American traditions.

Marriages is suppose to be about making memories with your partner and being happy and joyful while doing it. Romeo and Juliet fell in love ,but Juliet had arranged to be married to Paris. Juliet wanted to fake her death so that she could get out of her arranged marriage to Paris. Juliet really wanted to get out of her arranged marriage so bad that she had to fake her death. I strongly disagree with arranged marriages.Marriage should be by love not

One of the main reasons that Indian parents firmly believe in arranged marriages is because they find these marriages to last the longest and be the most satisfying. Their argument is that in an arranged marriage “it takes time and effort to know, understand, accept, and love each other; a whole lifetime” (Marriages in Heaven). A study was done in 1996 with twenty-five Indian couples in arranged marriages, twenty-five Indian couples in love marriages, and twenty-five American couples in compassionate marriages. They asked these couples to score how satisfied they were with their marriage and relationship.

Although a multitude of studies have been conducted and papers published researching arranged marriages, developing a solution framework to tackle associated challenges and conflicts is still in a nascent stage. The change in mindset of the younger generations will be a leading proponent against the rigid thought processes of people and thereby

Moreover, Couples fight, curse each other and sometimes they stop talking to each other. Consequently, this will affect their children in a negative way as well as on their mental development; sometimes children stop believing in marriage, or they are trying to find love outside their family ,or they start gaining bad habits because they don't receive proper care from the parents that they deserve. For example, one of my friend and her boyfriend have dated each other for five years. Furthermore, when my friend asked him to marry; he said no for marriage, but he wanted to live in a relationship because of his parents. Besides, his parents are together, they have some differences in their relationship, but they didn’t break their relationship just for their child. Additionally, he was grown in the environment where his parents always had problems with each other and that is why he wasn’t able to get positive vibes even though he was living with his parents. As a result, he does not believe in marriage anymore, which created the problem with my friend and his relationship. Shortly, marriage is all about love and peace that all people need in their lives, and if it is harder for couples to develop peaceful and lovable habits for their children

Arranged marriages are set up by friends and family, and sometimes by a matchmaker that sets up the marriage. But the bride’s father has the most responsibility in arranging marriage for his daughter, and is the one who approaches the father of a potential bridegroom. Important aspects when considering a possible match are financial status, caste, and the bride and bridegrooms horoscopes matching. The role of astrology is important, and if a Hindu priest finds that the horoscopes of the potential spouses do not match, they will not marry, and must begin the search all over again (Livermore, 2009). India’s view of marriage first and then love is very different from the Western view where love comes before marriage, seems to be successful. The

In todays’ world, with increased incidence of unsuccessful relationship or marriages, there are some people who want/prefer to live together before marriage so that they can understand each other and they don’t have to experience a painful divorce. In my point of view, this is another option/type of marriage. Because if the relationship won’t work successfully then they can separate their ways easily and live happily. By living together before marriage, they have time to know about each other's living style and behavior and their relation get even stronger than before but if it does not work then they can move ahead in their lives before taking a wrong step of living together for the whole life but sometimes living together is against to some family principles, ethics of society, religious point of view. Sometimes these types of relationships are very successful without any regret in life and on the other hand it comes out as an unsuccessful and worst relationship. But I think advantages are more powerful than disadvantages.