Middle Child Syndrome

First born children who later have younger siblings may have it the worst. These children are given excessive attention and pampering by their parents until that fateful day when the little brother or sister arrives. Suddenly they are no longer the center of attention and fall into the shadows wondering why everything changed. They are left feeling inferior, questioning their importance in the family, and trying desperately to gain back the attention they suddenly lost. The first born child can become “problem children, neurotics, criminals, drunkards, and perverts” (Cloninger, 2008). However, on the flip side, the first born usually are the peacemakers of the family even though they are a pampered and spoiled child.

I am a middle child. I am not the assertive, naturally confident first-born, nor am I an attention-seeking youngest child; I am the quiet, quintessential middle child. For the first 16 years of my life, I was always an afterthought to the craziness of my two sisters, and I loved it‒ it made me independent and self-reliant. I have always been very comfortable being the easy-going child, happily accepting anything that comes my way. Never have I felt that my parents loved me any less; they merely had to worry less about me than they did my siblings, with their stubbornness and constant desire for affirmation. I easily slid under the radar, preferring to mind my own business and handle problems on my own. There was never anything wrong with my

According to Alfred Adler, the birth order of the children in a family will largely affect how they age and the personalities which they will form. First borns enter the family as the only child. They revel in the love and full attention from their parents, that is, until the second baby comes along. Suddenly, first borns are dethroned and lose the undivided attention they are used to receiving. As a result, they tend to develop a strong sense of responsibility and protectiveness over their siblings at an early age, which often leads to them becoming authoritative adults. Moreover, when there are multiple children in the family, parents will set high

I have often wondered if the “middle child syndrome” is real. The middle child syndrome is stated as the feeling of exclusion by middle children (those with one younger and one older sibling). This effect occurs because the first child is more prone to receive privileges and responsibilities (by virtue of being the oldest) while the youngest in the family is generally considered the “baby”. In most families the first child is an over achiever. The first child is often entrusted with more responsibility and receives more privileges. The baby of the family gets away with the most and is seen as needing the most help. The middle child has lost its role as the baby which leaves them with no clear role in the family. Middle children tend

During middle childhood there are many different changes in a child’s life and this is an important time for children to start gaining confidence. Every child is vulnerable and has his or her strengths whether they are a regular child, gifted or a child with special needs. Abnormality is normal and what makes us who we

He describes it as, “knowledge that is tested by practice within a community” (Conquergood 377). The accomplishment behind the performance of being a middle child is that middle children are, as stated above, seen as the invisible glue. They value love and acceptance and try to convey this message of community. Although the role of being a middle child is thrusted upon them and don’t know the reaction or the end result of this performance, majority of the time it works out in their favor, as they become more community oriented yet, independent. They help create this community and use their skills as a younger, yet older sibling to help look at things from different perspectives. Being a middle child, not only helps the individual grow as an independent individual but, also helps those within the community grow. They show the meaning of togetherness to help promote community. They do this through their low self-esteem days, where they joined different communities to find a sense of belonging, this include extracurricular at school. These different activities helped them create their definition of what community meant. The discourse being sent across is the idea of self-growth through performance that is predetermined based on birth order. Although, there are stereotypes for each birth order, the middle child is the one most talked about and is seen as the most extreme. The idea of “middle child syndrome” is just like every other pseudo syndrome that is transferred through knowing, and has been carried through different cultures. This goes to show that although it seems like it is a bad thing the end results usually turn out to be for the

The oldest child plays an inimitable role in the structure of her family. She has a propensity to be confident and often craves her independence at an early age. She sets the standard for her younger siblings and realizes that her actions are observed closely by impressionable eyes. This accountability often instills in her a drive to act in a respectable and responsible manner. As the oldest child in a family of eight, I have been persistent in regarding these characteristics and have enabled them to shape my identity.

First, an article by the Huffington Post mentions that the youngest child is the “life of the party”. Parents are already confident in raising a child that when the youngest is born, parents are more likely to be more lenient and not pay as much attention to you compared to your older sibling. Research also says that the youngest has more freedom, and is not necessarily expected to do anything (Gross, 2013). What actually occurred in this family is exactly what research says. Laney has always been the outspoken one within the family, and when growing up she always got what she wanted. Over the years, she shows the personality of a youngest child with relying on parents, and letting her sister have more control. Thirdly, what was hypothesized

Siblings influence development in a variety of ways by providing teaching and caregiving opportunities that result in greater cognitive, language, and psychosocial development in both older and younger siblings (Jenkins, 1989). Specifically, sibling relationships that depict a balance of nurturance and conflict have been found to provide children with learning opportunities that lead to greater perspective taking skills, different strategies to resolve conflict, as well as regulate their own emotions (Volling, McElwain, & Miller, 2002). For example, younger siblings have been found to be more socially skilled and have more positive peer relationships compared to children who lack the sibling experience (Volling et al., 2002).

They tend to “branch off” from the oldest sibling’s traits, in an attempt to be recognized for their own characteristics and not be compared to their older sibling (“Birth Order”). Because the oldest sibling usually is very scholarly and conscientious, the middle child often becomes somewhat lazy and has less drive. They are stuck in the middle of older and younger siblings, and often end up being the mediator or the compromiser (Lemain). Because of this, they grow up to have great people skills in varying groups. Middle kids sometimes struggle with jealousy and self-esteem because they were given less attention growing up compared to the oldest and youngest children (Collins). Middle kids can be somewhat competitive because they always have needed to compete with siblings for goods and attention. Sometimes, however, they are more laid back than their siblings. This depends on the child’s own circumstances (“Birth Order”). Overall, middle children are independent, social, and diplomatic

Parents’ own birth orders and children experience can impact family dynamics, such as, firstborn parents getting into “raging battle” with a firstborn child, youngest-born parents not having high expectations on their kids or seeing their children’s abilities, biases based on their own birth positions, sticking up for the children with the same birth order, and birth order affecting the children’s personalities.

Being the youngest child of a family cannot be easy with the constant comparison to the older siblings. Not only are firstborn siblings known for being smarter than other siblings that come along but they get a physical advantage also. Studies have shown a lot about how birth order affects the oldest and youngest sibling, but as for the middle child, they have seemed to puzzle researchers. Some researchers seem to believe the order of birth is almost as important as genetics. Researchers also go as far to say that no two children have the same set of parents due to the way parents are different with each child.

Rosenberg and Oh (2014) state that first born children’s oppositional behavior was frequent three weeks after the birth of a new sibling, and that children deliberately engaged in naughty, demanding, and noncompliant behavior that caused considerable stress for the mothers. Older siblings can become lost and stressed to find their place with the birth of someone new introduced to the family. This reaction by siblings is further exacerbated by the mother’s and infant’s needs being in high demand as

Since the dawn of civilization, families have had traditions that carry on to our society. One of these is the fact that the firstborn son is the most powerful of all his siblings. Nowadays, this idea has all but vanished from our society and only lives on for the sake of tradition. This concept, even if it is virtually nonexistent, causes change in people based on their age in relation to their siblings. The fact that the oldest male descendant was the most powerful creates a few ripple effects that still hang around today. Most obviously is the fact that the oldest sibling takes responsibility for the others. At a young age, this may translate to bossing people around. This, in turn, gives them a sense of law. They are the boss, and the others

In the early stages of a child’s character development, the family is the first social group that the child has. The relationship that is fostered between the family and the child is important, because it is the role of the family that influences the child’s behavior. Although the child may be influenced by the father and siblings, these relationships are looked to second. The child realizes early that the family belongs to him. This leads to jealousy towards other siblings because he may strive to be significant, and establish a position of superiority. Once the child comes to trust the family, it no longer feels threatened. By fostering a good relationship with the family, the child develops trust which leads to the child developing