My Future Becoming A Fantasy

I put on the lead apron and walked into the operating room. I was shadowing an interventional radiologist, and although I was just watching the procedure, I was nervous. What if I faint? What if I get queasy during the surgery and have to walk out? These questions filled my mind with diffidence. But as I stood there, just a few feet from a doctor carefully maneuvering a catheter around the vasculature of the patient’s brain, I had never been more intrigued and excited. My feelings of self-doubt washed away as a flood of fascination and curiosity came over me. I watched as the doctor skillfully pulled the blockage out of the women’s brain and place it on a tray next to me. The enormity of the procedure was not lost on me. Sitting next to me

I finally came to recognize that spending my life doing something that I find enjoyable needs to be replaced by something incredible, and in my eyes, inconceivable. One person, the doctor, is trusted enough by the patient to carve their way into this unknown body and explore their internal organs in an attempt to fix a medically induced complication. I know that by pursuing this career, I’ll reach my goal of doing something that is going to benefit both myself and the surrounding community in a way only few can achieve.

It is a warm summer evening at Grady Hospital. It is my first day as an emergency room volunteer. I’m nervous and eager, hoping to see something exciting. However, it is surreally quiet. Suddenly, there is word of an ambulance en route. Minutes later the paramedics burst into the trauma slot pushing a man on a stretcher. His head and face are covered with gauze that is soaked through with dark blood. It is a flurry of well-orchestrated movement as the attendings and residents start to resuscitate him. They pull back the bandages to reveal a deep gash that is bleeding profusely. With much effort his vital signs are stabilized and he begins to regain consciousness. Later, after the excitement had passed, I learned what brought him here. He is diabetic and couldn’t afford to properly manage his condition. He had fainted due to hypoglycemia and hit his head. He had almost lost his life because of the unfortunate financial realities of modern healthcare. In that moment, I came to appreciate the very real cost of disease and the incredible role physicians have in ameliorating it. This formative experience was the beginning of my path to medicine.

Before entering my master’s program at Tulane University School of Medicine (TUSOM), I had the chance to volunteer in the surgical department at Providence Willamette Falls Medical Center (PWFMC). While volunteering, the majority of my patient interactions involved helping patients in any way possible, which usually meant simply talking with and comforting them. After all, most patients do not choose to be in the hospital and are to some extent afraid. They become scared as they attempt to contemplate the personal and financial costs of their ailments for both themselves and their loved ones. This awareness was further highlighted studying, observing, and volunteering at TUSOM. Most notably, shadowing Dr. Douglas Slakey, a surgical specialist, and his team in the gastrointestinal (GI) clinic at Tulane Medical Center.

I was aware that I had another set to play ahead of me. I knew that somehow I needed to drastically change my attitude and approach on the match. Forcing myself not to shut down after the first set is one of the biggest hardships I have ever experienced on a tennis court. The second set granted me one last chance to redeem myself, one last chance to display what I was truly capable of.

While taking in each detail of the surgery, I witnessed the specialized skills required to make the incision and insert the tube through the patient’s chest. The physician’s success in carrying out the skills reminded me of the techniques I had mastered for my microbiology thesis. I found the missing link between my fascination with surgery and my thesis research: patient-centered care. I was awestruck by the physician’s ability to maintain focus on the chest tube insertion while simultaneously providing emotional support to the patient throughout the surgery. Witnessing the procedure instilled a deep desire to develop the physician’s abilities to deliver life-saving, patient-centered care.

To say that this incident was the defining moment as to why I chose medicine would be an exaggeration, but it had undoubtedly been an affirmation of my decision. To embark on a career in Medicine was not an easy decision, and it was certainly not something that I had aspired to be from a young age. In fact, it took nearly half a decade of careful consideration and exploration before I reached this conclusion. My motivation to become a doctor stems not only from my love for science, but also from the special connection that is established between a patient and a doctor during diagnosis and consultation. The opportunity for devoting a lifetime to alleviating illnesses stands as my inspiration. I believe that there is no other profession that can be compared to one which utilizes one’s acquired abilities to bring about a more immediate impact on someone’s life, just as this experience had

We compared the outcomes between etomidate versus propofol for induction of anesthesia. A year later, I presented a poster on our findings at the Midwest Anesthesia Conference for the first time. Though nerve racking to present among residents, fellows and attending physicians, it was also very rewarding. I was given the opportunity to see the different aspects of anesthesiology, learn more about the field, and take a glimpse at the different directions anesthesiology is heading as a field. Unknowingly, the dots began to

However, once we arrived at the hospital and the waiting began, anxiety began to creep in again. My parents tried to comfort me with small talk, but I couldn’t focus. I could only think about the surgery, particularly how the surgeon would stab an IV into my hand. I kept envisioning the stabbing pain that would carry from my hand up my arm. The surgeon finally came in and asked if I had any questions and to tell me that the operation would start shortly. “Is there any way I can wear a mask instead of having a needle? I hate needles.” My surgeon, a kind looking older gentleman said gently, “No, you’re too big for that. We can give you laughing gas though if you-” I nodded enthusiastically. “ Alright, laughing gas it

I went to the appointment on that Monday, and being a bigger hospital, I was even more terrified. We checked in, and luckily found a spot to sit in one of the waiting room. The room wasn’t filled with sadness or negativity, it was somehow filled with laughter. There were many children, therefore some of the parents had brought coloring book for them. I just wanted to know what these children were at the hospital for. They seemed to be the most charming children ever, and I just couldn’t understand why whatever they're going through was happening to them. My parents had left to buy coffee,

Sarah B. office, I felt a slightly nervous, but very confident that this interview will go well. She walks in with a smile as she heads toward her desk. “So, I was told that you are a student, do you mind me asking what school you are currently attending?” she asked. I answered, “I am currently attending City College of New York in Harlem.” As we continue to converse about me and my background, I felt more comfortable enough to interview Dr. Sarah. For this piece, I am have changed her name per her request. First few questions I asked was about her educational background as well as her experience. To my surprised, it is very impressive and interesting. “I attended John Hopkins. It was not what I had expected, but there was always a competition between my classmate and I to always to do better. This was a motivator to make sure that I was on top of my game.” To go back to her past, I asked when did she realized that the medical profession was something she wanted to do. Her interest in surgery came about when she was a teenager working in a general surgeon’s office. The very first operation she witnessed was a gallbladder removal, also known as cholecystectomy. “I can remember it was appealing because I could see the anatomy that I’d have learned in school, but it was in real life. It was

In previous literature, patients have demonstrated and expressed feelings of helplessness, powerlessness and anxiety (6,9). Surgical interventions and procedures invoke strong reactions around pain, complication risk and death for the patient and their families (5). Additionally, in the preoperative phase of waiting to be transferred to the operating room, previous studies have shown that this can be the most frightening time for many patients (5,6,9). When this preoperative waiting time is compounded with the sudden cancellation or postponement of a patient’s surgery, many patients experience heightened negative effects (5,9).

The rest of the day was a blur, too many worried faces, too many bloodshot eyes to remember any details. There was restless waiting and relentless encounters with doctors that seemed to never end. Although, despite all of the action throughout the day, it was all ended when the head Cardiothoracic surgeon came out and told us that he had repaired a bleed coming from my Uncle’s heart, and that he would survive. I had never felt more joy in my life, and that was the moment that I knew I wanted to be a surgeon. If I could feel that much of a rush just thinking about saving a life, there was no doubt in my mind that being a surgeon was what I was destined to do. Being able to save another person’s life and bring that amount of joy and relief to their family was

The times I’ve considered quitting tennis, the times people have told me to put the losses behind me, the times I’ve sat red-faced in front of my parents thinking of the words to say that I’m done, that I can’t do this anymore, are times I regret more then anything. Sometimes, I can’t even remember why I thought those things. I now understand how hard it is to commit to something, but all the sacrifices I’ve made, all the events I’ve missed, all the feeling I have pushed aside, have been worth it. Not only because of all the benefits I know will come with all that I do, but because of the feeling I get when I’m hitting the ball. It’s a feeling of glee, of amusement.

Anesthesiologists, otherwise known as, “Dr. Feel Good,” administer drugs and pain relievers. During surgery the physician makes decisions on what type of anesthetic, based on medical history and complications during the surgery. Monitoring a person throughout the day and night is a common task. Pre and postoperative care have some of the most extensive points in a physician's day. “Anesthesiologists may choose to focus on a particular field of anesthesia care, such as obstetric or cardiovascular anesthesia. Some develop an expertise in the use