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My Letter About My Dear Mi Hur

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My dear Mi-hur, It is wonderful beyond words to hear from you after this hiatus, though I wish it had been under different circumstances. I doubt you will be surprised to hear how many emails I have received in the past week that were –– if less eloquent –– very like yours in substance: How could your country do this? How could you be so foolish? I suspect your own horrified questions, like theirs, are essentially rhetorical; that you do not expect replies. As a matter of fact, though, I do know what has overtaken my country. To explain it I am afraid I have to digress rather substantially. After you left for Seoul and I dropped out of graduate school, I comforted myself, as better men have before me, on the seedier corners of the Internet. In my green years I had amused myself by sparring with Usenet creationists and spamming Goatse links; now, I spent my hours of free time browsing 4chan. I can tell you exactly when I saw it, for I pasted it into a Word document, and have not modified it since. I have checked –– Date Last Modified: October 26, 2013. It was a string of greentext on /pol/, 4chan’s politics discussion board; I have pasted it below, but at this point I might have typed the whole thing from memory. >be 14 and horny >be dating cute chick >she won’t put out unless you accept the eschatological doctrine of Chhoteling >get down on your knees in from of her >swear on the name of brahman that we are bound to destroy the world with laughter >pray for the arrival

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