My Problem With Her Anger By Hope Edelman Analysis

The divorce rate in the United States is higher than fifty percent today. The divorce rate continues to increase in America due to many reasons, one of them being that society today is a disposable society. Back in the day, when someone had a broken shoe he or she would fix it, and if there was a problem with a couple’s marriage, the two would work through it. But today, it is easier to ignore the problem, throw away what we do not like anymore and move on to the next, which is not the right way to live. In Lorrie Moore’s “A Kid’s Guide to Divorce”, Moore writes about a child and his or her mother. The two are sitting in their living room watching TV as they

Bartels explains that wives often let out their stress induced, pent up anger on their husbands. He uses his own life and instances he has experienced with his wife to support himself. He describes his wife as tired, angry, and wanting to take that out on him (Bartels 58). Bartels has experienced this spousal anger firsthand, giving him credibility to write about it. He understands how the cycle of spousal anger works. However, his lack of other means of support makes his article fall short in some areas. Whereas telling a personal story may appeal to one reader, it may not appeal to the next. Bartels lacks a balance of logical and emotional appeal. The emotional appeal that Bartels uses is successful, though. He says that at times his wife is so negative that is “threatens to grind [his] spirit to dust” (Bartels 59). This use of emotional language is well executed because any reader will either be able to relate to him or feel sorry for the situation he is in. However, some women may sympathize with him less as they take the side of the wife in his story. His stance is flawed because he comes at this argument at an obviously subjective position. Bartels overlooks the idea that many women will not feel sorry for him if they disagree with what he has to say.

Leving and Sacks argue against the negative image of the male role in a marriage in the article “Women Don’t Want Men? Ha!” In this article, the authors point out how much effort a man puts into the relationship, and how often it is unappreciated. Women are sometimes over critical of their partners, and they often are too harsh on them. Although I am a woman, they effectively argued their point and I believe that one cannot be happy alone.

Eric Bartels has experienced the struggles and difficulties of marriage and describes them in his article entitled “My Problem with Her Anger.” Bartels’ article includes the struggles that he endures as a victim to his wife’s fury and the ways in which he feels his wife’s outlook should be repaired. The author establishes the anger present in the relationship, and then concludes with how her anger problem needs to be fixed.

In the article “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All,” Anne-Marie Slaughter explains why women can’t manage both the difficulties of a high-end job while doing the best they can as a parent. Slaughter is a very successful women who had worked for Hillary Clinton at the state department being the first woman policy planner. She begins the essay by explaining a conversation that came up between herself and a colleague who held a senior position in the White House. She tells her colleague that is has been very difficult for her to be away from her son at work, when he needs her at home. At this point Slaughter comes up with the idea to write an article about these struggles she and many women are dealing with. Throughout this meeting Slaughter

Her life with her son and teaching is her new dream. She realizes that, “she began teaching as a kind of self-sacrifice, subverting her own desires and ambitions for the ambitions of her students” (336). Debra knows that what she gave up, as in her career, made someone else's life better, not only her students life but also her sons. Although it was hard at first, she learned that, “true sacrifice is painless” (336)

With her long days at trial, Marcia faces the repercussion of less time at home, which she is criticized for from her husband. At the end of a day of trial, Marcia states to the court, “I cannot go late tonight.” As the judge asks why she cannot go late, she explains, “I have to take care of my kids.” The idea that the woman has to be the parent who takes care of the children comes into play, as her ex husband becomes frustrated at times when he has to take care of the kids because his wife is working. Women are told to be the parent that stays home with the child, and when they don't they are criticised. Clark’s ex husband publicly criticises her for the lack of time she spends with her kids, which appears much worse for a woman than it would for a man. Because she did not fit into the perfect female-mother mold, she is condemned. This brings the traditional double standard; men are supposed to work, and women stay at home with the

Bartels describes his home life in detail, he has a gargantuan amount of household work. Most of the time it goes unrecognized, only to be criticized for what he doesn’t do. He depicts his wife as a hard worker, who does happen to have anger issues. Instead of identifying an issue and fixing it his wife decides to go to him and

Bartels talks about how he wants his wife to be happy yet he is telling her to “buck up” (60) when she is feeling that stress and anger that comes along with motherhood. Bartels gets so caught up in what he is feeling that he is missing the basic mistakes he is making. When he starts to rant about what his wife is doing wrong and how much she complains, he then says that “an overworked wife is certainly within her rights to express her concerns” (61). When someone reads these two statements, they begin to think how can someone be mad about how their wife complains but then say it is justified and she has every right to do it? Or how can someone say they want their spouse to be happy then say she needs to buck up when she is sad? These contradictions are key mistakes that make the reader question the author about how truthful he is about what he is

The historical accounts by Stephen Coontz are something of importance that has brought us to where we are today. He mentioned how recognition of marriage was left to the church (Coontz, 2007). Based on additional rulings by our own Supreme Court such recognition is no longer viable based on separation or church and state cases. Additionally, because of the financial gain our government receives based on taxation of couples, I cannot for see them going back to the 16th Century standard as you had mentioned. The most interesting thing to me is that such a definition of marriage is within the power of the states to decide, not the federal government.

In the 19th century the idea of “True Woman” came busting out onto the scene. “True Woman” was the idea of a perfect woman. A “True Woman” was obedient, quiet in her opinions, selfless, and a good homemaker. “The Cult of Domesticity”; as it is called today, made women feel inferior to their male counterparts because women were not the breadwinners of the family. In The Yellow Wallpaper and Other Stories, Charlotte Perkins Gilman subverts the ideas and values of “True Woman”.

“Divorce isn’t such a tragedy. A tragedy’s staying in an unhappy marriage, teaching your children the wrong things about love. Nobody ever died of divorce,” states Jennifer Weiner, a New York Times Bestselling author, in her novel, Fly Away Home. Although Weiner has a point in voicing that a dispirited and forlorn relationship can corrupt the innocent mentality of children, it is vital that she also considers the darker, more sinister side of divorce. To put the term ‘divorce’ simply, it “is what husband and wife do together when they no longer wish to do anything together“ (Yantiss). If for any reason one may feel as if their current marriage isn’t right, isn’t working out, for them, one way to solve that problem would be divorce: the

Tension can be an everyday occurrence in the lives of those who are married. This tension can occur through multiple means and can be detrimental to a relationship. For example, tension in marriage can come from money problems, infidelity, and unexpected circumstances. However, in some relationships the tension is caused because of a partners personality being overbearing or selfish. This paper will look at Mary from Steinbeck’s The Winter of Our Discontent”, and how her lofty and submissive attitude causes tension in her marriage with Ethan.

A. The magazine article titled, “How to Stay Married,” is written in a cause –effect pattern of organization. Authors who use the cause-and-effect approach don’t just tell what happened; they try to explain why it happened too. In this article, author Anne Kingston uses various examples of cause-and-effect. One sample from Kingston’s article is, “it’s precisely the disconnect between that expectation that husband and wife be everything to one another and the reality of marriage that causes women to keep secrets…” (p3) Here Kingston begins her statement with the effect and concludes it with the cause of women keeping secrets.

The interviews were coded and some of the themes that were identified were the degree of husband involvement, the degree of communication, responsibility, degree of support, and type of