Any first time parent understands the struggle of raising their first child. This new parent becomes suddenly responsible for more than herself or himself. There are many strains and demands to fill such an influential role. That pressure often overwhelms a first time parent, who continually wonders if they did a good enough job. As parenting experience naturally progresses, parents gain deeper understanding, new realizations, and improved techniques on what methods fit the parenting style they see best. For some, that development comes too late. As in the case of the mother who narrates her experience in Tillie Olsen’s “I Stand Here Ironing.” As the mother reflects on the unfortunate consequences of raising her daughter who she longs to feel some connection to, she portrays the guilt she feels as a circumstantial result of helplessness, confusion, and struggle.
While the narrator acknowledges her inability to improve Emily’s life now, she attributes the blame of her role to being limited by outside pressures as Emily grew up. For her, motherhood was defined by the situation she gradually and unexpectedly got herself into. After losing her husband to an unforeseen event, the mother struggled to meet financial needs and still spend sufficient time with her
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Such a determining responsibility is not to be taken lightly either. Both of these principles rang true for the mother in “I Stand Here Ironing” as she reflects on her painful experience of raising a child. Not only did the mother’s unfortunate situation limit her own personal choice, it also limited her daughter’s. Just as an article of clothing is subject to the heat and pressure applied by an iron, the young child’s development was submissive to the her parenting. Despite her desire to feel a personal connection with her daughter, the mother’s guilt and regret of her mistakes is a product of what she let be an inability to control her
The reader cannot help but feel the burden the daughter will be sharing with the mother. And while the plight of the mother is real, the reader cannot ignore how the isolation and loneliness of this type of community, or lack there of, has effected Tome's judgment in mothering.
The narrator seems unable to establish direct contact with Emily, either in the recovery center or their home life. The narrator notes how Emily grew slowly more distant and emotionally unresponsive. Emily returned home frail, distant, and rigid, with little appetite. Each time Emily returned, she was forced to reintegrate into the changing fabric of the household. Clearly, Emily and the narrator have been absent from each other’s lives during significant portions of Emily’s development. After so much absence, the narrator intensifies her attempts to show Emily affection, but these attempts are rebuffed, coming too late to prevent Emily’s withdrawal from her family and the world. Although Emily is now at home with the narrator, the sense of absence continues even in the present moment of the story. Emily, the narrator’s central
Emily’s upbringing is plagued with difficulties. She is the first-born of a young mother and the eldest of five brothers and sisters. As a baby, she is
In the short story "I Stand Here Ironing" by Tillie Olsen the conflict between a mother whose giving is limited by hardships is directly related to her daughter's wrinkled adjustment. Ironing, she reflects upon when she was raising her first-born daughter, Emily. The mother contemplates the consequences of her actions. The mother's life had been interrupted by childbirth, desertion, poverty, numerous jobs, childcare, remarriage, frequent relocations, and five children. Her struggling economic situation gave way to little or no opportunity to properly care for and nurture her first-born child. In spite of the attention and love Emily craved and never received, she still survived, and even made strengths, and talents, out of the
While James Baldwin’s short story “Sonny’s Blues” depicts the connection between two brothers, Tillie Olsen’s short story “I Stand Here Ironing” represents the bond between a mother and her daughter. Both Baldwin and Olsen focus on family relationships and how emotional support vs neglect have an effect on family members. Also, each author conveys a message of finding self-identity even amidst adversity, while including the symbolism of everyday objects. Furthermore, Baldwin compares light and darkness throughout his story, and Olsen has the mother scrutinize her actions in an interior monologue.
The line between being an acceptable and unacceptable parent is often blurry and is seen on different perspectives when it comes to class, culture, and generation differences. Based on the two stories of Amy Tan’s, “Two Kinds” and Tillie Olsen’s, “I Stand here Ironing” we see these two perspectives that derive from different maternal upbringings of the children in the stories. What is found between them is the conflict of being too little or heavily involved in a child’s life has had more negative outcomes during their childhood than positive.
In the countless lessons about washing clothes and handling food, she reveals something about herself: that to her, there is no life outside of the one that she has, and she approves only of the same life for her daughter. That as a girl, her daughter must know these things, because her daughter’s only lot in life will be the same one that she has now. The mother’s worldview isn’t the only thing affecting the teachings of these lessons, though. Another strong influence behind these lessons revolves around the mother’s personal
Dr. Diana Baumrinds’ research on the various parenting methods are directly mirrored in the parents that influence Sophie. The narrator of the short story closely resembles Dr. Baumrind’s first method of parenting, authoritarian. Dictating Sophie’s actions can be traced back to her cultural background, with a high stress on obedience and discipline she often times forces Sophie to conform
I Stand Here Ironing lies in its fusion of motherhood as both metaphor and experience: it shows us motherhood bared, stripped of romantic distortion, and reins fused with the power of genuine metaphorical insight into the problems of selfhood in the modern world. ironing is a metaphor for "the ups and downs, back and forth of pressing pressures to make ends meet and a determination to pass through life's horrors and difficulties by keeping the mind intact and focusing on the beauty and blessings that [lie amidst] the dark times"? So the ironing is like a drug, to keep the mother calm and sedated. The story seems at first to be a simple meditation of a mother reconstructing her daughter's past in an attempt to
The mother was an invisible parent for Emily. Her reason for not being there for Emily was because she was a “young and distracted mother” (Olsen 262). The real reason she was inattentive was because she was inexperienced. She lacks the understanding of how essential it is to be there physically for Emily. Emily needed her mother for
Emily is a very dependant woman who can’t take care of herself. She is so used to having her father around and to tend to her. At age thirty Emily is
Emily was back at home after the age of two. Emily never wanted her mother to leave always clutching her and saying “Mommy don’t go”. (Mandell & Kirszner, 2012, p.
In the story, “I Stand Here Ironing” the mother and the child is the main focus of this story. The bond the mother and the infant have is threatened as soon as the mother decides to give the child up to a sitter. Later the mother and the child bond is weaken and which makes it difficult for the mother to express her love for her daughter, living in poverty and the demands of caring for the other children makes the mother believes that she can be of no help to the girl’s further development. In the story as the mother irons it sets the mood and tone for the story.
In the story, “I Stand Here Ironing”, it uses a series of irony, theme, symbolism, and imagery. Some themes in this story include women and femininity, poverty, and power. In this essay I will be discussing these three themes in detail of what they influence. “I Stand Here Ironing” looks at women and femininity through the mother daughter relationship. The mother struggles throughout the story working long hours during the Great Depression, and is still unable to care for her daughter.
“I Stand Here Ironing” written by Tillie Olsen is a short story that reflects on the struggles of a single mother who looks back on the past and tries to assess the effect her decisions and circumstances had on her young daughter, Emily. “This story is part of the awarding-winning collection, Tell Me A Riddle, which was first published in 1961” (Wolfe). “This story is considered the most autobiographical of Olsen’s literary works (Piedmont-Marton). The title of the story is taken from the stories opening line, “I stand here ironing, and what you asked me moves tormented back and forth with the iron” (Bauer, Olsen). The story is one of the best examples in literature, and certainly one of the first, to offer readers a glimpse into the lives of the working-class women and families from a woman’s perspective. (Piedmont-Marton) This story “illustrates Olsen’s particular concern with the difficulties faced by women”. (Wolfe) As the story unfolds, Olsen uses distinct character traits, imagery, tone, and style to create a dramatic sense of the mother’s internal debate of her own feelings.