Things have gone downhill in a matter of days, and I have simply had no time to myself to sit and ponder. Brother John has recently killed himself due to his gambling debts. Shocked beyond belief, Mother had a stroke and is now on her deathbed, slowly fading in and out of life. Eliza and I have been tasked with taking care of her until she ultimately passes away. For the record, grieving and taking care of your dying mother at the same time is not an easy task. Jane is now coming back to Gateshead. What for, I simply have no clue. Last I checked, she hated Mother with a passion. I certainly hope she does not stay too long, for I almost went blind from looking at her as a child. I wish things didn't turn out like this, but it is what it is.