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Personal Narrative: Fluidity Of Sexuality

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This is for all of my homegirls that have decided to explore outside of what they’re accustomed to. The girls that, despite understanding the fluidity of sexuality, are still freaked out by how this one guy seems to have caught your attention beyond a “friend” level. He smells different from what you’re used to. He doesn’t have boobs. You find yourself wondering what that beard of his would feel like against your skin… at the apex of your thighs. (Or is that just me? ha.) You find yourself sitting in the dark wondering where you went wrong in your newfound attraction to cismen. It’s okay. I get it. It happens. I spent twenty-one years swearing off men because I was convinced that I wouldn’t find them as stimulating to me mentally or physically. …show more content…

A few months ago, a girl friend of mine revealed that she had a developed an attraction to me as we got to know each other in the past year. Apart of me went into a panic. I wasn’t ready for a relationship and ghosting had become a regular occurrence on my side of town. As someone that remembers almost everything about people, building potentially romantic connections that weren’t surface as hell freaked me out. “So, what does this mean?” was the first thing I could say without really taking the time to process what exactly it was that she was conveying. She immediately looked at me like I was crazy as hell and just said, “I didn’t say I wanted a relationship. I just wanted to let you know that I was interested. You can do whatever you want with that information.” After I picked my face up off of the floor, I had this overwhelming sense of relief. I expected to feel weird, but I didn’t. If anything I appreciated how brave she was. How often are people that transparent? never. People would much rather rely on mixed signals and reindeer games to get the point across. It’s exhausting to say the least. Ever since that happened, I’ve felt like it was important to communicate things of that nature as straightforward as possible. It’s easier to get what you want and/or need that way. If shawty isn’t fucking with it, if they're real, they’ll let you know once they can tell it’s honesty hour. It might not be straightforward to avoid hurting your feelings but the key words here are: context clues. Use them. Call your best friend for second input if you’re confused. Of course your ego will suffer from a few bruises, but you're less likely to idealize your interactions with said person. I think this point goes for everybody. Can’t really be out here screaming “real” if you spend 90% of your time hiding behind your

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