Personal Narrative: Living With Incurable Autoimmune Disease

Sometimes I ask myself how I overcame my disease. Many people with lupus experience fatigue, memory loss, loss of appetite. Usually younger African, white, and Asian men and woman develop that disease in their teens. It all started that night when I was laying in my mom bed. At that time I felt like it was my time to leave this earth. When I turn 15 years old I saw so many changes. . I experience so many symptoms while I was in my second semester. All the symptoms that I experience were hallucinations, fever, nausea, and nose bleeds. At that time I seen myself getting really sick. I caught strep throat and it was hard to focus in school because I missed so many days.

One time, I was taken aback and saddened by a patient yelling a plea to God as she was suffering through tremendous pain. As I walked into the room, the first thing this patient did was stop yelling and attempt to put on a calm face. It was a sobering moment, but I proceeded to ask her if I could do anything to help. What struck me most about this moment, was how much fight this lady could conjure up to hide her pain and yet still remain compassionate towards me. I hadn't expected anything, but this experience was a brilliant reminder of why I wanted so badly to improve the conditions of patients across the medical spectrum. I couldn't fathom the extent of this patient's pain, but I could fathom the idea of pain itself. In the patient, I saw a little bit of myself. I wanted to help this patient greatly and desired the means to do so. In this patient, I saw the nature of humanity. Human beings, for the most part, are inherently good and strive to be selfless even at their weakest moments. In fact, most people I know tend to be more worried about others than themselves, whether it be from a positive or negative perspective. As I got to know this patient, I realized how much she wanted to be with her family and see her grandchildren grow up. Though she was aware of the pain and suffering, she was also aware of what could be once she got through this struggle. Once I become a medical doctor, I can give back

In early November of 2014, I was just 19 years old and could barely move—my life was falling apart. I had never felt so sick and helpless before, and I thought I was going to die. The many doctors’ visits ended me in the hospital that year. I was scared to death; and I did not know what my future would hold. Now, as I take a look in the mirror, I see myself better than before. While this journey has been tough, and I still encounter many challenges of lupus (an autoimmune disease); I am thankful for God’s blessing of having my family and friends by my side during hard times.

Living is a gift. Many people in the world are simply alive, but living is rare. There are people that are too sick to enjoy life, the disease that has manifested in the body slowly takes over the mind and rids the mind of joy and radiance. The glow of life slowly diminishes before our eyes and it is truly heart breaking. This person is not just a disease that happens to be hosted in a human. This is a human that happens to have a disease. This person is someone’s parent, someone’s child, someone’s sibling, and someone’s grandparent. This person has memories, hobbies, and loved ones. This person is your patient. Making a difference in just one person’s life is an incredible feat. Being a physician assistant would be making a difference in many

I grew up dreaming and admiring the work of Florence Nightingale, Mother Teresa, and my aunt who is a Gynecologist Specialist while providing utmost care and assistance to sick family members who were in pain, especially my grandparents, my three months premature daughter, and my mother-in-law who fought with cancer for 15 years. Throughout my school years, I worked hard towards my dream, however, when in college I met my husband, was married and moved to Kansas. It was not until, after fourteen years of marriage that I started working as a Pharmacy technician and acquiring my CNA certificate that I felt as if God has chosen me for this purpose and I decided to acquire BSN degree. Since CVS was a neighboring store, I met people with various illnesses, started seeing them on a routine basis, and tried my unsurpassed in providing them with comfort, assistance, and support, while using empathy and tolerance in satisfying their needs. Most of all, I started

The medical field of nursing is based on servitude in God’s mission and through the means of compassion. Our missional goals must align with God’s (Wright, 2012). Nursing consists of care and compassion for the disadvantaged, weak, sick, and injured. This is in addition to the pursuit of high standards in professionalism, articulated in the delivery of a valuable service that is based on unique knowledge and experience, performed ethically, and practiced autonomously. The major characteristic of compassion is from God and how it relates to this world of professionalism is seen through nursing. Any job that advances God’s work in the world is a Godly choice (Col. 1:16-20).

The pervasive influence of scientific empiricism and Darwinism, “inevitably resulted in the establishment of the idea that the final reality is impersonal matter or energy being shaped into its present form by impersonal chance” (Schaeffer, 1981, p. 18). This change in worldview caused the removal of one of the basic foundations of nursing, the Bible. Throughout the Gospels we see that the ultimate purpose for physical healing was to restore people to a vital relationship with God and the community” (Shelly and Miller, 2006, p.24). Being able to demonstrate the value of this goal for today’s nurse is another important reason for me to understand nursing theory and history and how it applies to my philosophy of nursing.

During the last week I have had the pleasure of interviewing several individuals about their beliefs and how those beliefs affect how they would anticipate their own needs in a healthcare setting. I found that I also learned a lot about each individual’s faith, how their faiths affected their daily lives and their worldviews. I conducted four interviews in the last week and I believe that I have captured a diverse cross section of view on faith and reality from these individuals.

How can I as a minister use my own self, not only as channel of information about my own inner knowledge and experience but equally as an empathic receiver of the other’s affective state and the shared meaning that is emerging between me? This chapter has made it clear to me that as a minster when I know who I am, I will be able to empathize more and take good care of the person who is under my care. John Patton affirms this by saying “one of the most important elements in ministry to the sick is an invitation for the carer to talk about her own illness but an invitation to the pastor to be aware of her own vulunability and her own need for care” (John Patton 62). To me this awareness will help me to place my whole attention on the patient and I will be able also to focus on what I am sharing or if it is just being there in silence with the patient I will still be fully present with the sick person. This reminds me also of mother Theresa of Calcutta who worked with love and cheerfulness, bringing hope to the abandoned and dignity to the dying.

The hospital can be an isolating place for some people and this does not encourage healing. The Christian faith can be lived out in the medical field by having a genuine desire to connect with those around you. The comfort of having someone who cares about you and always connects with you is a stress relief and helps with the healing process. Offering to pray with or listen to the patient's worries builds this relationship. Knowing someone is fully invested and wants the best for them will make communication much easier in the hospital because there is a sense of

I got to see physician assistants of different specialties, and something special happened when I assisted with pulmonary and critical care patients. While walking into a patient’s room for follow up and observation, one of the patient’s family members approached the PA and me and gave us each a small, clear bag a little bigger than a quarter with a piece of paper in it. She looked at each one of us and told us, “Thank you for taking the time to care of my sister. I don’t know if you know this verse, but I hope it inspires you to have faith in the Lord to help us get over this obstacle in our lives.” I looked at the object that the family member had given me and it read, “Jesus loves you!” On the reverse side of the paper was “Matthew 17: 14-21.” As I looked at the bag, I saw something small in the left corner: a mustard seed. I was overwhelmed again. The verse was back in my life and was a glimmer of hope for someone who was very sick. That’s what I want to be, and that’s why I want to be a physician assistant. My passion for becoming a physician assistant increased much more at that moment. I want to be a physician assistant to be there for people and to give them hope through care and

It was the second semester of my senior year, and soccer season was just getting started. Prior to the first game, our coach put us through an extensive winter conditioning program. Looking back, it was the hardest I have ever pushed my body to this day. Having worked so hard, I was very optimistic about the season ahead. That optimism, however, quickly changed.

I realize that the most capable physicians can heal because they have been sick and are able to fix because of their own brokenness. In other words, adversity builds character and changes people for the better. In my case, my disadvantaged upbringing has made me a better person, son, father and potentially a better public servant. After my parents divorced in 2000, my mother and I moved to Little Rock, Arkansas where we struggled to get by. Enduring that hardship with her changed me from an early age. Some nights I stayed at my best friend’s apartment, because we had no electricity. In a sense, this deprivation allowed me to mature and understand that in life you must sacrifice for a larger

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou

Nurses that listen to their patients, not only notice that they are physically hurt, but they can also notice their emotional wounds. The empathy of knowing that the patient is emotionally hurt is part of the spirituality connection. Therefore, they might need comfort. O’Brien (2001) states that, “ No other profession provides the opportunity to touch and be touched by the human spirit as does the practice of nursing. It is this intimacy that calls us to reverence: reverence for God as our creator and Lord…” (pg.110). Nurses have the privilege to connect with people in ways that no other profession may be able to provide. Since nurses are patients advocate, our duty is to connect them with their spiritual beliefs and