I choose to incorporate my multimodal project because it shows that I can think outside the box and find small ways to make society better. Using rhetorical purpose, critical thinking, and what audience I am conveying to is more amplified in this paper. During peer reviews, I narrowed down my topic and determined the medium in which I wanted to convey the information through. I had many ideas, by talking with other people I came down to conducting an experiment on myself. For the teacher review, the biggest thing I changed was the third audience. I narrowed it down to a single group rather than leaving it open to society. This project has a higher meaning than the basic ideas of a clean room and it pertains to people in college. In college, …show more content…
I am not the most comfortable or best at writing about my experiences or feelings. I feel that this was a challenge because I felt weird showing most type of vulnerability in my writing. My goal for this piece was to shadow the concept that animals don’t have a voice, they get put into situations based on their owners, especially when it comes out to health. In those situations, there are times when there’s no right answer based on ethics. It was extremely hard to put those ideas in there without flat-out stating it. After the all the revisions, if a reader truly dived into the story they should find that theme. The biggest thing I changed in my writing was word choice, I wanted the paper to flow and feel natural to me. By doing so the paper felt more right to me and seemed to show the story in a new, ordered light. I believe through all the peer edits, it has created a better voice in my paper. Overall, the paper seemed to grow in more way then one over the many …show more content…
I had many issues finding creditable sources that flowed with my original topic on castoruem. There’s so much different kinds of information on it, it was hard to narrow it down to one central idea. When I first wrote the paper, it was a mess. There was not really any organization, or flow to the paper, and it didn’t really make sense. For the teacher revision, I fixed a good portion of that issue, but it wasn’t all the way there yet. In order to fix that issue, I attempted to do this by focusing on a single paragraph as a whole and making sure it related back to that central theme. Another issue I had was having my sources drive my paper because I was not complete sure what I wanted this paper to say. I fixed this by introducing the author and focusing on my ideas. With the topic I have chosen, I think that I had a good idea on where I wanted to go, but the sources shook my ideas and lost me in my own paper. In the paper, my critical thinking relies on the ideas that people do not know what is in their food and companies are allowed to cover it up with different word choices. This time in editing my paper, I tried to be very aware of the who my audience was and my purpose in the paper. From end to finish, this piece has been the most reviewed and fixed out of everything I have written this
I have a love-hate relationship with writing. I can write well according to some of my peers; though this could just be from the fact that I seem like the quiet, studious, type who has spent most of her time with the straight "A" nerds who went on to top tier schools such as Stanford. Sometimes I am not too sure of my own writing abilities. On most essays, I get a little bit above average grades and every once in a while I get a few more points than usual. I have noticed that my writing is better when I have to write about a topic I am passionate or know a lot about. The more I have to work with the better. Otherwise, my writing seems poor, forced, and somewhat bland. It usually follows a poor or basic thesis statement and lazy paragraphs. I believe motivation helps me to write better,
Many people enjoy and have fun writing, but then again, many people dislike having to write, including me. Writing has always been something I was never really interested on for many reasons.
Typically, when most people think about the writing process they think of terms such as a ‘thesis statement,’ developing an outline, body paragraphs, conclusion; it’s imperative to view writing this way. We have only been taught THIS way of writing almost directly after we learned how to spell words—you decide what to write about, usually specified in the thesis statement, then you write a series of paragraphs entailing how you came to this conclusion. Finally, you conclude your paper by restating exactly what it was you spent an entire essay writing about. And most people will go their entire lives believing that is the formula for an effective, well thought-out work of literature. But how often do we go back and read through our writing and completely resent how amateur and forced it sounds? This is usually a direct result of a lack of revision within a work. Defined by the Merriam-Webster dictionary as “a change or a set of changes that corrects or improves something” and “a new version of something that has been corrected or changed,” Revision is not a common word we think of when writing—this raises a serious question: how should you revise? In response to this to this, research was conducted to find a general view as to the significance of revision within various individual’s writing processes. These results, along with research from several academic articles provide a clear description as to where revision could be
Throughout the revision process, I had the opportunity to discover my voice as a writer and engage in the conversation that is academic writing. In my final paper, I tried to reinforce the idea of a roadmap to guide my reader along my thought process. During my Embedded Writing Consultant appointment, I walked through the guidelines of a roadmap with Amarachi, and she emphasized the importance of a roadmap in reorganizing my paper. I realized that I could clearly articulate what I wanted to state by explaining it to her out loud, but when I translated such ideas to my paper, the main point oftentimes became lost. You mentioned something similar in your feedback, as many of the points I made did not connect to my central claim. Recognizing that I needed to emphasize my plan and then carry it out, I rewrote my paper with this in mind.
Al, Alde, de, shon, deshon, and Al’Deshon my name takes on many forms. Kind of like my writing in a sense. I have never been a strong writing also being the reason, I took this class first semester I think. If I get it out of the way maybe I’ll have an easier chance of reaching the finish line happening to be graduation.
With myself changing many things about my writing there are still certain things that I have not changed about my writing. One thing
Thinking about our first writing assignment, one of the suggestions focuses on the comparison of writing to running, it became apparent to me that this is something I would enjoy writing about. I am a long time running advocate, competing in marathons, and a neophyte writing student, and I find many similarities in both endeavors.
Around two or three years ago my family and I had to move houses. Moving was sudden and we didn't know it was going to happen. This made moving out and into the other house a lot harder. Since we were moving so fast somethings we just decided to leave behind with the person that was still living there. We got most things with us but one thing that we did leave back in the old place was our living room tv. Since we had just moved and my family isn't rich my mom said we couldn't go get a new one for some time. This sucked because I used the tv a lot for watching show, movies, and playing games just like the rest of my family did. Having a tv wasn't something we needed at all but it was always something to do when you were bored and there was no other things to do. Another big thing was my grandma had just gotten us a new playstation 3 and now we weren't able to used it at all because there was no television. Not having a tv was bummer for me and I thought it was a huge problem when it really wasn’t.
My capstone project was a dog walker and a wheelchair for Seely. Since the Humane Society didn’t know if she’d be able to get a prosthetic or not, my group designed two products for two situations. The walker will help Seely learn how to use a prosthetic leg, if she gets one, and the wheelchair will allow her to walk without her front legs.
Moving, for many people, can be a difficult process. A lot of the time kids have to switch schools and deal with the challenge of making new friends and getting used to everything new. Since my parents divorced when I was five years old, I can remember living in many different homes. My mother would rent out a place, live there for a few months, then meet a new guy and move on. For years, I hoped to myself that my mom and dad would get back together, like Nick and Elizabeth Parker from “The Parent Trap.” I knew, however, deep down that such a thing just couldn’t happen. My four siblings and I were dragged along, forced to go with the flow and adapt as quickly as possible. Up till she married her second husband, Tony. As young as I was,
For the revision project, I needed to make more changes to this paper due to not fully getting my point across or because I needed to add some more information to my paper. The first thing that I had to work out was my title. I read the beginning of my paper again and decided on a better suited title that would fit into what my paper was mostly about. Next, I had to fix a sentence that contradicted what I had said earlier in my paper. Another big issue in my paper was the placement of the story of Dylan Roof. To fix this mistake I used parts of my essay that talked about Dylan Roof to form a back story closer to the beginning of my paper. Some of the other sentences that I had written originally made more sense in my mind and when I put them on paper they made it sound like I was saying something different, so I changed the wording in those sentences.
My feature story was written as a personal experience piece and slightly a lifestyle piece. I chose the topic of long distance relationships because it’s near and dear to my heart considering I am currently in one and have been for over a year. Another topic I thought I would write about was a how-to plan a trip to Florida. In order to get information and quotes, I used my own experience and my boyfriend, Thomas, for quotes, as well as my mom and what she said to me in the past. My piece exemplifies a “feature story” by being about a personal experience with short quotes and multiple pictures to catch the reader’s attention. Mostly all parts of my writing worked well. Trying not to get too personal was hard. My best thing about my article is
Plav, Montenegro is a small, poor village in Europe. It is the place where my parents were born and raised. Even though I was born in Brooklyn, New York, I feel I was raised in Plav, Montenegro, too. Growing up in America, where the culture and traditions are so different from that of Montenegro, I was faced with the obstacle of trying to become part of mainstream America while maintaining my own culture.
My capstone project has been a fast pace moving journey. This has been an intensive and active learning project that has consumed my daily thoughts. I am hoping that I have presented my written capstone project in a thorough, organized, concise, logical and clear matter. Chapters1-3 and revision of the matrix for chapter 3 are completed and are scheduled to be re-submitted this week. Every time I revisit the project I feel compel to add more and more information. I am thankful to have another semester to work on chapters 4-5. This project does require 3 semesters to complete, but when I took the first class the capstone was called a research project and not a capstone project, therefore I had to start all over again. My preceptor,
When it comes to my paper, my revision process was different from my papers article. The first thing I did was self-edit/ revision. I started with ten pages, and I edited it down to 8pages. With the peer review, Nick provided me with his great opinion, and that helped me take out redundant information which brought my page count to 6pages. In Office hours, your overview helped me narrow down my page numbers to 4pages. After the office hours, I worked extensively to incorporate your advice into my papers. I followed your advice like going back to add dates in the in-text citations, moving some topics from the different paragraph at various locations and making sure I had the correct citations and references.