Personal Narrative: The Redeployment Ceremony

It’s the day I have to move to the army's campsite. I grab my bag and swing them on my shoulder, it weighs a ton it feels like my shoulder’s gonna break. Sophie was peeking through my room door, as I was about to stand up she ran to the living room curled up into a ball making loud thud and sobbing noises. Outside of the house, I hug my mom as tight as I could, I don’t want to move any single inch of my bone. I want to stay like this forever. I felt a drop of water behind my shoulder and I know that it was her tears. I don’t want to leave them but I have to. It was time to let go but she didn’t want to, I grab her arm and slightly push them back.

Millions of men and women have served in the armed forces before me and millions more will serve after. Some have paid the ultimate sacrifice; some lost and captured, others received wounds, physically and or emotionally, and that time

Being in war is definitely one of the most life changing events a person will ever have whether it be for the better or for the worst. Soldiers will witness events that are impossible to forget or see back at home in the states. Some soldiers may have even seen one of their best friends that they’ve known for forever get blown up into pieces right next to them, or they might even get one of their own limbs blown off of their own bodies, becoming handicapped for life. As a result of seeing something so intense like that, most soldiers are usually traumatized. In matter of fact, a great amount of soldiers are traumatized from the very beginning of being in war. It’s without a doubt difficult to deal with this but there are some ways where

No one could imagine strapping on boots that you know could be torn right off your feet, imagine jumping out of an airplane behind enemy lines; or imagine living on a US aircraft carrier fearing the threat of underwater mines every day. The bravery it would take to be in any of those scenarios is enormous. Many brave veterans have their own memories to share when they return home to tell the stories, but countless others never get that chance. Veterans have that rare bravery that sets them apart from the rest.

My grandfather was drafted to be a medic in Vietnam 82nd airborne. One day he sated that he was with one of his best friends going out to check for wounded. He said “ I nudged my best friend and asked if he was read only to turn around to see that, half of his head was gone. Have you ever cut a grapefruit in half? That is exactly what his head looked like.” In this traumatizing moment my grandfather explained that in War there is no time to have grief; that you do not have any time to comprehend what just happened. He proceeded to tell me that War wasn’t about saving your friends because you have to save yourself.

I was in the Marine Corps serving under Third battalion Eleventh marines Mike Battery in Twenty-Nine Palms California from 2009-2013. What our unit did was put rounds down range, oorah. We were an artillery battery, think modern day cannons. As far as twenty-nine palms all you have to imagine is sand in a five hundred square foot mile area. My job as Ammo chief was to insure the safe handling and transportation of hundred pound high explosive bombs. On one partially long training exercise I was instructed to take my marines and four ‘7-ton’ trucks and go to the rear to load up with more ammo. No problem, I’ve done this before but on this occasion when I was going to return the battery would have moved positions. So they gave me the grid number

This battle left a lot of the newer people in my trench shell shocked. They were shaky and couldn't be comforted due to the never ending feeling of panic. They were all sent home to be with their families, this made me want to go home to be with mine. Many soldiers in my trench would harm themselves intentionally to go home. I wanted to follow in their footsteps but I knew

I retain an increased value and compassion toward the military community since this experience. Our society praises and dedicates media to the individuals fighting for our freedom, yet fails to discuss the harsh reality that many veterans face when returning home from war – homelessness, mental illness, relationship failures, and inability to acquire a job. In an essence, our society takes military veterans for granted. We can support and cheer them on while they fight for our freedom, yet we neglect their freedom when they return to the United States. It stands truly heartbreaking how many veterans survive the war, yet find themselves struggling to live in their own nation. At the VA, I noticed that many Veterans, while appearing tough and strong, do not mind discussing their mental health and the components of life they struggle with. I noticed that while the veterans will state where they served and their purpose in the war, they tend to shift the topic away from their service. I am not sure whether this behavior relates to their humble personalities, an inability to discuss military information, or emotional pain. No matter the reason, the “brotherhood” of military veterans remains evident. Veterans connect on a level society will never understand. They are a family that does not discriminate one another based on race, mental health, age, or gender. After

With every organization comes a degree of change. The Marine Corps is no different. With a rapidly changing world, we must strive to sustain the transformation and remain true to our ethos. Across the Marine Corps the culture of each unit is different, with sustaining the transformation as our tool we can make each unit better for new generations of Marines. Marine Raider Training Center sustains the transformation by holding quarterly promotion panels to ensure deserving promotions; however it fails to sustain the transformation by not welcoming new Marines to the unit appropriately, I will build a Welcome Aboard package to sustain the transformation for my Marines.

Now I am 49 and the war has been over for some time now and that is good and somehow bad for me. I have changed much ever since the war ended and so has the whole Platoon. It is crazy how much I have changed in the past 40 years first I was scared of the war, then I was a lieutenant in the war and now it’s hard for me to function without thinking about the war. Right after the war all of the squad member tried to see each other as much as we could. But now the few of us that are left can hardly ever see each other. Or don’t make the effort to. An example of what I miss from the war is the way we honored the dead. It was very unique we would make

In September of 1993, my mother, Pamela, was stationed in Kuwait. After a few weeks of deployment, she was informed that she was pregnant and would have to return to the states. In April of 1994, in Fort Lee, VA, she met her husband, Richard. A month later I entered the world, and she was given a choice; leave me with a family member and return to Kuwait, or be discharged from the Army. Having already left behind one child she chose to be discharged as well as to settle down and have a family with Richard. Three years later they welcomed a beautiful baby girl into the world, and the next year a baby boy. To people on the outside looking in they were a perfect family, but looks can be deceiving.

My experience with military based relocation has been very minimal. My family moved from Cherry Point down to Beaufort, SC and after three years we moved back to Cherry Point. While living in South Carolina I made lots of new friends, but I did miss many of my old friends. At first, it was uncomfortable to talk with new people, but something that was definitely helpful was that there were kids who have gone through the same experiences like me. Once I found people who have gone through what I was feeling- the initial shyness, the awkward first weeks, and the desire to gain a sense of normal again- it made the initial weeks much easier to deal with. By joining this group I was able to get through the initial weeks and was able to gain a

The toll of war on my unit was not something that I understood until I was well into redeployment. I remember vividly the redeployment ceremony and all of the new gold star families (families who have lost a soldier) that were standing on the bottom of the bleachers. The Brigade Commander began to honor those who have made the ultimate sacrifice and I broke down into tears. I watched how lost and torn apart those spouses, children, and parents were with their now incomplete family. Furthermore, they endured a grueling and at times hopeless twelve months of uncertainty and emotion, only to endure a total loss of love for the remainder of their lives. During the wounded warrior walk, after the ceremony I cheered on platoon, after platoon of amputees who were making their way through the streets of Fort Wainwright. Ultimately, everything was quickly put into perspective after these two events.

I joined the Marine Corps looking for a challenge. I wanted to open doors for a new career and longed to have a positive impact on the world around me. Looking back five years later, I realize I found all that I originally sought, but I’ve also found something profoundly satisfying and meaningful that I never knew I was missing.

My grandfather’s story was an amazing one. While he talked he spoke about so much passion the soldiers had fighting in the war. He told the story how the one day he had to go out into battle. The United States troops fought in the horrible plains, and tangled, unbearable woods. They walked through swamps, and lived in horrible conditions. My grandpa said that being on the field there was an almost seventy percent chance of being killed. The living conditions were so bad than many of the soldiers died along the way while moving locations.