Personal Narrative: Waking Up

I want to leave, I want to disappear. Not a vacation, but that spontaneous quick escape with no bothers, just an unrestricted trip to free the mind and enjoy the bits of silence. To go by car to see how the scenery around me changes as I kill the distance, while listening to my favorite music as loud as I can. Just shout out my lungs with my terrible singing. As the music plays, I will grab a book, which will get all my beliefs and views away. No matter what the book will be about. As long as it would get me away, away from here. There would be just me and the characters of the novel, who struggle, fight, and compete, while they face delight, pleasure, and glory. Every so often, I will stop at the cafes on the road to grab some food, which

When my mother asked me to read a book a few months ago, I was hesitant to agree. A stressful school year was approaching, and seeing my friends on a Saturday night seemed much more appealing. When I was younger, curling up with a good book was a typical pastime. Then came high school, and reading was replaced with countless hours of studying, cheer practice, and trying to figure out when I could catch up on some much needed rest.

“This is a great experience, you’ll make so many new friends!” my parents told me excitedly

The saying goes “Change is what makes the world go round”. Well, my world would move much smoother if I got rid of a few things. Table condiments, meatloaf and roller chairs have got to go! My world would be a better place if these items didn’t exist!

Summer: the season of ice cream, beaches, air-conditioned cinemas, and 30 lb cardboard boxes full of clothes and books. By the fourth quarter of my sophomore year, I could envision the rest of my high school life unfold as if flipping through a scrapbook brimming with photographs and jotted captions. A rising upperclassmen, I had full conviction that by 2018, I would play varsity doubles tennis, attend Naugy Prom, and graduate alongside the 250 people I had known since middle school, some even from kindergarten. Naugatuck, CT had been my home for all 16 years of my life—and despite hopping from apartment to house when I was 5, I couldn’t fathom changing towns, much less before I departed for college.

“Not for the first time, an argument had broken out over breakfast at number four Privet Drive. Mr. Vernon Dursley had been woken in the early hours of the morning by a loud, hooting noise from his nephew Harry’s room.” — these are the words that framed my childhood. Unlike other children, who were raised to spend time playing outside, I was raised alongside a young British wizard with a scar on his forehead and a penchant for finding trouble. Of course, the adventures of Harry Potter are not actually fact; however, to a boy gleefully resting on his mother’s lap their authenticity was never in question. I can still remember so many things about the way that she would read to me on those lazy Sunday afternoons. Entranced by her soft voice rising and falling as each syllable passed over her lips, I sat and dreamed for endless hours.

There is an unseen balance in the universe, one not measurable with charts and graphs or even with the highest tech machines man has to offer. This unseen balance guides my life like a tiny white flame, showing the way through the infinite maze that is life.

The minister is currently looking for a new place for the church to be located in. He shared, "I found several places near my house, one was 10 minutes away from the current church location by car."The minister has been searching for 2 months diligently for this new home for the body of believers in Denver. Pastor Thomas will be registered soon at OU, but currently he isn't. "Now things are quite busy here. I will pray about that, and when My co-worker returns from Dover for Kbers training, I will have more help at the church." Shared the Pastor.

All around the country, students are being pressured to figure out the next step they’re going to take after graduation. Those with a higher intelligence might have been asked the dreaded question as early as their middle school years. Adults see this question as a good conversations starter, but as a student, they feel more pressure the more they are asked. In a way it is good to have that constant reminder to be on top of the game. Having this nagging reminder, the student should strive to have their decisions made or at least their options laid out simply to have an answer for the multitude of questions they will face. It’s important to be ahead of the game when it comes to college preparations.

As I wrote this essay a lot of memories began to move like a slideshow within my head. Each memory kind of reminded me why I am the person that I am today. Out of all of these years God has truly been preparing me for greater. God loves me for me and I overlooked God plenty of times and I overlooked his word. I learned that I was in some of the predicaments that I was because of myself not because of God. God only wanted to see me grow more in him but I always put him on the backside not trying to truly become a full Christian. I was afraid of the things that might happen because I was already dealing with some harsh times in my life. Time after time I got weaker giving up on God knowing that every single time I messed up

Waking up every morning and going to school is my greatest ongoing accomplishment. This may seem vague and not at all very worthy but to me it has been the hardest thing I have ever done. My freshman year I was obsessed with getting all A’s and working hard so that I would be able to get into a good college. “You need to get good grades so that you can go to a good college so that you can get a good job so that you don’t end up a loser.” This was the mantra that was drilled into my head, it was the first thing on my mind when I woke up and the last thing before I fell asleep. Every choice I made became of the utmost importance, if I ate an apple rather than a bagel then it meant that I was not going to be a success. I started believing that

The air was brisk and bit at the windows of the bus. I gazed at the Peruvian landscape and the dilapidated houses as they whizzed by, suddenly I came back to reality. I was exhausted from the early start of the day’s travels. The roar of the bus and my exhaustion caused me to slip back into a daze. I kept gazing at the rows and rows of unfinished, drab, neglected houses. I then turned my attention to the people milling around.

At (almost) 22, I have to admit that I completely understand this sense of getting tired of “the whole scene”, spending my nights “dreaming instead of sleeping” and feeling “happy, free confused, and lonely in the best way”. More importantly I get that it’s “miserable and magical” at the same time.

“Sam, you have cancer” Dr. Kimmel told me with a tone that absorbed all of the energy in me like a black hole. I could feel all the happiness I once had slowly drain from me mentally, and I knew the physical part of me soon would start to fade. My family stood there in complete shock, soon after, my wife fell to her knees and filled the room with tears. My mind was racing, I lost all sense of who I was because I felt as if it didn't matter since I was going to die anyways. I didn't just have cancer, I had stage 4 brain cancer and nothing I could do, or anyone, would fix this. I knew it was bad when the MRI scans showed a massive tumor within my center of my head. My Stereotactic brain biopsy showed the cells were abnormal

I was a flightless bird trapped in a cage, wings clipped and song subdued. I had no distinct purpose, nor was I understood. Home was a prison, not for the insane, but definitely for the emotionally abused. My voice was constantly being shut out; only the people who wanted to hear my words were listening. Despite the words wishing to come out, I found myself unable to speak them. Regardless, I found myself in a place of understanding, of hope, and of insight. My mother was the light that guided me through the endless darkness. Only when she was gone, did I truly find my voice again.