Dearest They Are
When I was around 13 years old, I noticed changes in my parents and how they acted around each other. I knew something was different. It felt cold in the house. I just thought they had problems going on, and that it wasn 't that big of deal. One day I had just come home from the last day of school in my 7th grade. I checked the answering machine for new messages and I found what I had least expected - a message from my mother 's divorce lawyer. Even though all the warning signs had been there, I was still surprised. Things were bad between my parents, and my mom had already threatened to divorce my dad once that year. They started going out on dates again afterwards, though, and I thought they were past all that. Before
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I thought that she was doing that to get back at my dad, but I didn’t really care because he didn’t he come and visit us. Sometimes my dad would come to me at my Dugsi, but I would ignore him. He would say, “Hi” to the kids and leaving after giving them some money. The next time he comes i would tell him, “Stop giving the money to make them not hate you later”. He would tell me that i was seeing things wrongly, but I didn’t care because either way he wouldn 't tell me why he didn 't come home to visit us. I know most of the details and that my parents were in the process of divorce but around them acted like i didn 't know anything. I would treat both of them like strangers taking my anger out on them, but at the same time not showing them I was angry. Nothing felt right. If I was told to do something I would just do it in motion and go to my bed. I stayed In my bedroom most of the day, and came out to grab a bit after everyone went to bed. That summer my mom saw that there was something wrong with me, and decided that I should stay. My mom would talk to me sometimes, and ask me stuff that I didn’t want to hear like if I wanted to go shopping or go out and eat. I would just tell her that I wasn’t feeling well, and didn’t feel like going anywhere. My mom didn’t about me know about the divorce, but she knew that something was wrong so to the fact that dad wasn’t coming home like usual. One night I overheard my mom talking to me, and telling him
Six years ago, a summer afternoon, my dad hugged me and I said “I will be gone for three days, I have a job in Austin, but I promise that I will be back before your birthday. I promise.” Days, weeks, months almost two years passed by and I did not receive any phone call or text message from him. Throughout that time my dad was gone, my mom told me that she was getting the papers ready to divorce my dad. I was noticing that the last three-four years that I was living with both of my parents, their relationship was getting worse. It was not a healthy situation for anyone in the house. What I mean about not being healthy is that my mother and father were damaging one another, emotionally and verbally, which my brothers and I would watch everything. Every day was the same routine, we forgot how it was to have a peaceful home. Around that moment, I honestly never thought divorce was going to be their solution.
As a kid I only got to see my dad on the weekends and those were the best days I had, I never understood why I couldn't live with my father full time because my mom never lived a stable life. My mother wasn’t as bad as it seems, she always made sure we had food and somewhere to stay even if it wasn't the greatest, even living with my mom my dad still paid for almost everything I had. When I was about 8 years old I lived in Mccomb and it was my dads weekend and I was so excited to get off of school and go see him, When I got home I was shocked to find everything packed up and my mom told me to get in the car, I was so upset to find out that me, my two brother, and her and her boyfriend were off to Florida. The whole trip to Florida I balled my eyes out and all I remember was that I kept saying that I wanted to live with my dad and that I hated my mom, I wondered how she could just up and leave without telling my
I never confronted her, but for a long time I felt like I really couldn’t trust anyone and everyone was against me. After I told my parents about my depression our relationship went downhill very fast. The day after I told them I was taking a nap upstairs and then my dad calls me down so I come down. Then he asked me if I was sleeping and I said yes. He then started yelling at me saying that I wasn’t even trying to help my depression and I had no reason to be depressed. By this time I had already starting sobbing, because I really did have a reason to be depressed and I had been trying to help it since the fourth grade. I then run out of the house to cry and maybe run I didn’t know what I was going to do. So I sit on my porch and cry and cry when I hear my dad start to come to the front door to the outside where I was (whenever he would get done yelling at one of the kids he would find you and apologize). So I started walking I didn’t know where but I was walking. I find myself at our carport and I can’t walk or do anything but cry so I just sit down and I’m doing that cry where it feels like you’re screaming but there is no sound. My dad then shows up and does his whole apology thing but then he says that I should stop sleeping all the time and actually try to help my
My mom was very nervous and didn’t know if she was going to miss our lives when we grew up. Such as going on dances, dates, weddings and her opportunity of being a Grandma. It was hard for her to think that far ahead. She was always so sick, and when she started to loose her hair it was even harder. She didn’t want to feel like a “Boy” she would say. She tried as hard as she could to leave her hair in. When she woke up from her naps, that she took daily, the couch would be layered with dirty blond
It was June 16th, 2008 and I was home with my grandma and my mom and dad came home. With a face that I have never seen before. My mom brought a baby boy named Zack. I heard my mom and dad talking about how my mom had to quit her job because she couldn’t put me in day care cause the weren’t taking care of me, and she had to take care of zack so she decided to quit her job to take care of us. Also heard my mom and dad in our small kitchen about not having space for Zachary. They had a conclusion we were going to move.
It was an ugly one but everything happens for a reason. My parents needed to be separate so they can actually function. Once my parents divorced my mom and I moved out of my dads and we moved into a new home. I started a new chapter of my life, high school in a new home with my mom by my side. Now my mom had to take on the father and mother role at the same time. She had to pay all the bills provide me with transportation, cook, clean and work all at the same time financially supporting herself and I. Some days were extremely long and some felt like they were never ending. I would always remember waking up and my mom never having been there because she would always be working. Hustle while people are sleeping, I always thought to myself. I would only see my mom just for a few hours everyday. Usually I have to cook for myself and do everything by
All families experience their share of good times and bad times, I can remember so many wonderful times. Obviously, there were bad times, my parents fought a lot of the time too. I can remember being snuggled in bed, dreaming of lollipops and cotton candy gum drops, only to be woken by the sound of faint arguing through the walls; I never did let them know I heard. There were several occasions I can recall being scoped into my mother’s arms and packed into the car, we were running to my grandma’s house. It always went the same way in these situations, we would arrive at my grandma’s, my father would come and speak to my mother, and then we would go home again. I never really understood it; It was my first lesson in adulthood,doing things
Learning that my dad had decided to move out and divorce my mother came as a huge surprise to my family, no one saw it coming. My mother and I fell into the grasp of depression. She lost so much weight dropping down to 110-115 lbs., her face lacked color and her body was so frail. She would force a smile when my sister was around but I recognized the pain in her eyes because I felt it too. I found myself suppressing my emotions so that I would come off as OK, so that my mom wouldn’t have to worry about me, so that my sister didn’t realize that
Still not thinking anything of it, I just assumed she wanted me home because we were having a family dinner, my dad included. It was a normal dinner, with discussions about how our day went and jokes going around the table. Then directly as we finished eating and all the plates were cleared, I was about to go upstairs to my room when my parents said to sit down and that we needed to talk. I thought this was very strange and I thought to myself maybe this is it. They said the expected, it isn’t your fault, just sometimes things change and don’t work out, nothing will be different and so on. I sat there in silence, until they said they were getting a divorce. Once they said that word, divorce, it hit me. I could feel myself starting to fall into tears, so I just got up and left the table. I couldn’t listen to another word, because it was heartbreaking and I had never felt this sort of pain before. As I said earlier, I had seen it coming for years, but never expected it to actually happen. I began wondering why, why now, in the middle of my highschool years where there is already so much stress. I was angry and I didn’t have anyone to blame, but them. Even though I was very mad at both of my parents, I took most of my anger out on my dad. I was always closer to my mom and I could tell she tried her hardest to make it
My parents’ divorce has made the biggest influence in my life because it helped me determine and strengthen my identity. The experience forced me to grow up because of how close I was to the fire. When the divorce hit at age 17, I was not ready. My parents have always been my world. They always made sure that they upheld a stable environment for me. But my world came crashing down. I quickly began to learn things that I did not want to know and I started to slack off and hide away from social activities. After the first few months of the transitional process, I was being treated like a 35-year-old roommate more than an innocent child. I was given some independence. I was left alone more often while my parents spent time elsewhere. I had to
Throughout 2013 my mom and dad just couldn't seem to get along. I knew everyday when my father would get home from work; it was about to be World War III. Their relationship became more and more toxic. My dad, who I once loved and adored, became someone I didn't even know anymore.
My parents’ faces wore dark and grave expressions that told me there wasn't any good news to be shared. They began the conversation by telling us that what was going to be discussed was confidential and that it should not to be discussed with anyone besides them. After their warning we began to talk. They started off by saying we should not be alarmed or bothered by the information we will hear, but that it happens and sometimes things don't work out. After all of their preliminary words they told us the news. They told us that our close family friends, the Parkers had decided to get divorced. This was a shock for my brother and I and it shone on our faces with closed mouths and wide eyes. The room was so silent it was like there was a funeral going on in my home. They took a brief pause before they started talking again, but there was nothing to be said, only things to think. After the initial shock I thought of my best friend Tyler and what this would be like for him. I couldn't even imagine how this would effect him, but unfortunately I would find out only a short time later when my parents made the same decision. Shortly after the news was shared my parents reassured us that everything would be okay and they left us in the family room dumbfounded. I couldn't believe it. The same parents who were always joking and having fun together were getting
Claire and I had just come home after tennis practice. When we walked into our apartment we saw that our mom had made a huge fancy meal for us, and I had a small feeling that something was up. My mom looked at me with eyes that looked somehow guilty, but everything seemed fine I guess. After we finished eating we were very tired, so Claire and I went to our separate rooms. Not long after laying down, my dad came in and told me we needed to talk about something. He wanted to talk to me and Claire separately, so we walked downstairs to a private community room in our apartment. He had never done this before and I didn’t know what was wrong, so my heart began pounding loudly in my chest. When I sat down and he told me the news, the pounding stopped. My heart sank. He said that our family couldn’t afford to go to Cathedral anymore, so my sister and I would have to switch schools and attend Sartell High School that year. I walked upstairs slowly afterwards and fell on the floor in my room. I stared at the ceiling waiting for Claire to be told. I don’t think I really believed what my father said to me at the time. I tried not to think. I just
This lead to the choice of moving out of state, from literally all of the rest of our family is, and to Ohio. The move happened right before I started preschool, so I was around four years old at the time. We found a relatively cheap farm style house, in Liberty Center. Liberty Center has a population of around 2,000 people, so we got to know most of the town and everyone at school. Aside from being thousands of miles away from the rest of our family, we lived a generally comfortable life for six more years. When I was about ten years old, my mother had been diagnosed with breast cancer. We were all told everything would be okay, and that the cancer would be taken care of. For the next couple of years, things started to take a steady decline in events. After my mother’s cancer treatment, she caught a staph infection and became sick again. After being released from the hospital, my mother was transferred to a nursing home for treatment and physical therapy. She was there for many months and came home for holidays. In the beginning of April, 2009, she was cleared to stay at home permanently. She was still hurting even at home, and through many nights I could hear her screaming in pain downstairs in the middle of the night. Exactly two weeks after she
Devastated, I ran to my room gushing my eyes out. All these emotions going through my head of how my life would be without my parents in the same room or even house. From what I remember it all started about mid-June, the weeks before that were crucial. My parents would always argue over how to deal with a situation between me and my brother, Skyler. They hardly spoke to one another, but when they did they would just start bickering. I remember, one night after dinner they both went into ''their'' room with the door locked yelling at one another. Skyler and I didn’t know what to do, so we went downstairs and tried to figure out what was going to happen. With a scared tone I asked if mom and dad were going to get a divorce?" He answered back '' No, they love each other, they wouldn’t do that to us." That following night, was a school night everything was quiet except for my crying. I couldn’t sleep; all I was thinking about how it's going to affect my family.