Personal Statement : Domestic Violence

Hello, my name is Dee and I am a survivor of domestic abuse. A good friend asked me if I would write a piece about domestic abuse. He said it would be therapeutic for me and beneficial for other women who have been abused or are being abused, and I think he is right. So here I sit wondering where to begin, after about an hour of emotional flashbacks. And when I do think about this I wonder how on earth could I have let it go on, and for as long as it did. And more-so, what did I ever do to deserve it. I was never abused as a child. Never beaten or abused emotionally or mentally, never called names, or cursed at, and I suppose I grew up thinking this was how it was for everyone. I was only 19 when I met my abuser. I already had a son, and had been out on my own for 2 years. Life was hard, bringing up a baby, surviving on living assistance, living in ghetto like neighborhoods. I had always aspired to be a journalist, but my dreams were broken when I became pregnant right out of high school and was forced out of the house to care for my son. I met my abuser one day when I was down town shopping with my son. He came into my life like a "wolf in sheep 's clothing", and was just about as nice as he could be. I suppose I was somewhat lonely since I never got to go out very often. He soon moved in with me and helped me with my son, helped in the house, and helped financially so things were definitely looking up. Or so I thought. He was from an abusive home himself, and years

During those years he would kick, choke and even left her partially blind. Rosaura had threated to report him but he used his title to intimidate her. After writing police and city officials nothing was ever done and he was never charged (Cheema, 2016). This is probably a huge reason why many officer involved domestic violence victims do not report their abuse. John’s reasoning for why he believes domestic violence occurs within law enforcement families appears to be accurate with the exception that there was no evidence pertaining to the environment that a sheriff grew up in as playing a factor in domestic violence.

As a determined student looking forward to obtaining a doctorate in psychology with a focus in domestic violence. My passion will influence me to travel where all diversity constructs itself which is in the nation’s capital, Washington D.C, to indulge in my career. Within my experiences as a scholar in a Washington conference and a former volunteer at a crisis center the ticket will take me to graduate school in preparation for Washington. It is my goal to provide my assistance to those in need of upmost prestige’s psychologist and feminist advocate.

Many women and men seek intimate relationships in order to fill their emotional needs of security, safety and love. Their journey starts off with their loved ones spoiling them with flattering gifts and emotional words. The love they feel is so wonderful and deep that they believe that nothing can come between them. They are so happy and convinced that they will live happily ever after with the one they love. Unfortunately, the fairytale they have dreamt about was only temporary and soon comes to an end. The love story they have ones longed for turns into a horrible nightmare. The emotional words they were once spoiled with turn into howling screams and name-calling. The flattering gifts turn into physical abuse. This relationship is referred to as domestic violence or intimate partner violence. This happens when a partner or significant other declares power, authority and control over the other partner. To maintain this authority and control, the abusive partner uses emotional, physical or sexual abuse over his victim (Alters 27). Victims will desperately look for an exit out of this relationship, but only to be blocked by numerous walls of the despair, fear and misery. Many people are convinced that victims have the option of leaving, but they are too weak and they choose not to. What many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers. In most cases the outcomes of leaving are

An individual who is responsible for subjecting their intimate partner to domestic violence is often controlling, manipulative, aggressive, violent, and dangerous. It is important for an individual who is experiencing any form of abuse should contact authorities to prevent any further abuse in the relationship. While the victim of domestic violence is constructing a plan for a safe escape, the victim will choose a domestic violence attorney. A domestic violence attorney is a lawyer who specializes in family law.

A relationship is formed when there is a mental connection creating a bond between two people. There are multiple types of relationships that being said, a relationship between two people can have different meanings. Although relationships come in different types, it’s important to understand that all relationships have boundaries that must be acknowledged. In this paper, I will cover healthy vs. unhealthy relationships. I will discuss factors followed by a unhealthy relationships and what triggers the perpetrator to act on domestic violence and the reasons why victims (women) choose to stay. I will also go into detail on how culture has an impact when making decisions regarding a marriage. Finally, I will wrap up with health concerns that women may encounter due to verbal, physical, and emotional violence. Other concerns that need to be considered when in a relationships that goes unhealthy will also be covered. My reason for choosing this topic is the amount of interest I have in learning more about severe conditions relating to relationships. Often times I see and hear about people in relationships that are more of a threat in their life rather than a partner and continue to remain that way.

Domestic Violence is a type of abuse. It involves injuring someone; usually a spouse or partner but it can also be a child or other family member. It includes physical violence, sexual violence, psychological violence, and emotional abuse. The frequency and severity of domestic violence can vary dramatically; however, the one constant component of domestic violence is one partner’s consistent efforts to maintain power and control over the other. Abusers use fear, guilt, shame and he wants to keep the victim under their control. The abuser may use many different types of abuse to assert this power, and the overall framework in which the abuse occurs may follow a pattern called the cycle

To understand the cycle of domestic abuse, one must understand what constitutes and is considered

The cycle of abuse starts when an individual is abused and then the perpetrator feels regret. The guilt leads the perpetrator to ask for forgiveness and engages in positive behavior towards the victim. The victim does not leave the abuse because he/she “perceives few options and feels anxious terminating the relationship with the abusive partner, feels hopes for the relationship at the contriteness of the abuser and does not call the police or file charges.” In addition, after the victim forgives the perpetrator the couples experiences a honeymoon stage. During the honeymoon, stage the victim is optimistic about the relationship’s nonabusive future. After the honeymoon

While I know what a healthy relationship consist of, it made me realize that even more women than I originally thought are probably victims of an abusive relationship. There are some women that I work with now or over the past few years that everyone in the office thinks their spouse is a “jerk” or that they deserve better but never really thought of them as a victim. A lady that I worked with recently would have to call her husband and talk to him during her lunch hour because he believed that she was cheating on him. He would also control what she wore and would not like when she would have make-up on. Her spouse would think she wore make-up to attract other men. I knew the way he would treat her was not right but never once thought she was involved in an abusive relationship. Abusive relationships to me are relationships in which one is forced to participate in unwanted sexual advances or activities and physical abuse such as hitting, chocking etc.

Her research finds that, “Intimate partner violence is experienced by at least 1.3 million women each year, who make up 85 percent of the victims.” (McVay 4). Further stating that programs continue to be funded that are ineffective for these women that are experiencing the abuse. Shockingly Kristie also found a link between attachment and partner violence, showing that “…the influence of insecure parental attachment bonds creates an individual who often develops anxious adult romantic attachment patterns leading to a greater propensity to enter into a violent intimate relationship.” (McVay 4). Understanding that these predispositions occur in childhood is pivotal in understanding how these things blossom and continue to grow throughout life within a person’s character. That parent-child relationship plays a role into all other intimate relationships. In fact, “personality/behavior problems all stem from early developed attachment patterns.” (McVay 17). Analyzing adult attachment patterns showed why some people cling to violent intimate relationships as well. Proving that just as “…infants struggle with dissociation and rejection from their caregivers, so do adults suffer from separation from their intimate partners.((Feeney, 1999) Mcvay 19). Another important aspect is defining just what intimate partner violence (IPV) is. “(IPV) is perpetrated or threatened physical, sexual, psychological, emotional, financial, or stalking violence, which includes willful intimidation perpetrated by a current or former intimate partner against another.” (McVay 54). This proves that intimate partner violence is not only physical but also emotional. It is something that negatively affects the partner, it is hard to detect, and can affect anyone, sometimes even without them recognizing it. After her study, she found that if the relationship doesn’t pose extremely dangerous

There is a certain level of myth regarding what society views as a healthy or unhealthy relationship. While the latter is seen through rose-colored lenses, the former conjures images of violent drunks who beat their partners. Unfortunately, it is not always so obvious. Very often, abusive relationships have

I would shut my eyes because I knew what was coming. And before I shut my eyes, I held my breath, like a swimmer ready to dive into a deep ocean. I could never watch when his hands came toward me; I only patiently waited for the harsh sound of the strike. I would always remember his eyes right before I closed my own: pupils wide with rage, cold, and dark eyebrows clenched with hate. When it finally came, I never knew which fist hit me first, or which blow sent me to my knees because I could not bring myself to open my eyes. They were closed because I didn’t want to see what he had promised he would never do again. In the darkness of my mind, I could escape to a paradise where he would never reach me. I would find again the haven where I

Relationships always start off good and usually we hope they stay that way, but that is not always the case. Men and woman soon find themselves in abusive relationships filled with pain and regret. Movies and T.V shows give us vast examples of abusive relationships such as intimate terrorism.

There is a cancer plaguing the land, which is slaughtering the very fabric of every relationship in its path. Abuse comes in a myriad of forms, and the aftermath has a negative impact that is unending. One may ask what is abuse, or what does an abuser look like. Particularly, this cancerous condition is not discriminatory against any social class; hence, an abuser can be of any race or gender. Moreover, it comes in a myriad of forms. Nevertheless, the most prevalent ones perpetrated in relationships are verbal, emotional, and physical abuse.