Power, Decision-Making, And Decision Making In A Family

As displayed in these stories, there is not always a mutual agreement within the family about several situations. Even I have faced conflict within my family, while I was growing up a time or two. Whether the issue involved something that you felt wasn’t fair or it was simply because you were told to do something in which you did not want to abide; the fact remains in every culture, family, life, or relationship, there will come a time where a conflict will arise.

The film, Precious, is a powerfully charged story that delves into the family dynamics of a 16-year-old girl and her struggles to survive an onslaught of treacherous experiences. Throughout the film, the viewer is enveloped in a dramatic web of extreme situations, experienced by the main character, and those to whom she is close. The themes of domestic violence, rape, incest, drug addiction, gambling, poverty, social justice, social services, housing and education are laced together throughout the story. Particularly poignant attention is paid to various systems that help shape the experiences of the characters. The social services industry, and its associated workers, educators and administrators, set the foundation for the social themes that are highlighted by this film.

On a crisp autumn day in 2016, while hidden away from the cares of my daily routine in my family room, I was called upon to elaborate on an important aspect of my life. It took some time for consideration to determine how to best portray a journey I have taken in managing conflict, as I am not a young woman. Decades filled with the blessings of being the mother of disabled children, years lived as a single parent, as well as the process of maturation, tempered by the fires of adversity, have molded me into who I am today. As I reflected, I wondered if would I know how to deal with conflict as I do now without the life experiences I have had? Certainly not! The following paragraphs will describe my primary conflict style and why I use it, how I have changed constructively in this area, how the other four styles of conflict management may serve me, and where I hope to arrive as I continue to make my way along the journey of my life.

Interpersonal conflicts are inevitable. Different texts suggest not how to avoid conflict, but rather how to effectively communicate when involved in one. However, the “rules” of constructive communication can completely change in conflicts between people in long-term, interdependent relationships. This paper will focus on analyzing a conversation between a mother and her adult son, while applying ideas from William Wilmot and Joyce Hocker’s Interpersonal Conflict, Deborah Tannen’s I Only Say This Because I Love You, and the “Conflict Styles” lecture.

Dumlao, Rebecca. Botta, Renee.”Family communication patterns and the conflict styles young adults use with their fathers.” Communication Quarterly. Vol. 48 no. 2 Spring 2000: 174-189.

The second parents that I interviewed was Terry and Ross Kunkel. Even though they were both present, Terry answered the majority of the questions. The interview was done at their house in Bluffs. Terry and Ross are both retired; even though Terry has gone back to working part time for the village. They have two kids; Linsey and Harley. Linsey is I’m assuming in her upper 20’s and has her own family with two kids, and I just learned, she is also expecting twins in October. Harley graduated in my class and just turned 21 a few months ago.

1. Question: Share some of the background of your interviewee (or couple). What was this person’s/couple’s story?

Marriage: Despite her independent streak Skeeter is constantly pressurized to marry, is often made to get ready by her Mother and look beautiful for her dates with so called handsome well established men. The marriages of various characters in the movie, Skeeter’s parents, her friends, Minny, Stuart’s parents are all nearly shown with problems that are intertwined with gender related power

I interviewed John and Cindy about their marriage and the challenges they’ve faced together as a married couple. I am encouraged by their relationship and have decided to use their relationship as a model for my second interview. John and Cindy have been married for almost 5 years. In addition to this union, there is McKenna, Cindy’s son. They are a blended family, of course, and are part of the more modern structure of families in our society.

In conflict we often make the mistake of using our power to focus on the relationship or on the issue/  outcome we desire.  The result is that we often attain one at the expense of the other.  Our power may enable us to achieve our goal but damage or destroy the relationship.  Alternatively, we may sustain the relationship at the expense of our needs or desired outcome.  The ideal may be maintaining a healthy relationship while at the same time achieving our goal, but this requires a subtle and complex use of different kinds of power or perhaps not using the power at our disposal.  This requires wisdom, self control and self discipline as well as skilled interpersonal behavior.

Loyalty is one of the simplest moral traits to understand. Either someone is loyal, or they are disloyal—there are not many shades of grey in between. For this reason, loyalty is one of the most desired traits in our friends, family, and partners we have in our lives. Loyalty weaves hidden bonds among people that in some cases can never be broken. Such is the case of Pak Chesang, devoted servant of Nulji, 19th king of the Korean kingdom of Silla.

Conflicts in the family are usually considered as an undesirable symptom of a problem that need to be solved by family members. 1 In the family relationships, the parent-adolescent relationship represents an involuntary association, an imbalance of power and resources, and an obligation for the parent to function as caregiver.

p.65). In conflicts relational goals need to be realized and managed because they are the center of all conflicts (Wilmot, 2007. p.67) but they are not easily recognized internally or externally, and they are interpreted differently by each party (Wilmot, 2007. p.67). In the reviewed conflict, the parents feel that the children are becoming more independent, and do not care what the parents think or need. The children believe that the parents do not consider the things that are important to the children to be important. Basically, each seems to seek the respect from the other units. The way that each will react throughout the conflict will express how that person believes the other is thinking about them. They will react to an image that they have created of the other person that probably is not accurate (Wilmot, 2007. p.69). Because relationship goals are not easily determined, these goals will escalate.

If we talk about Christianity point of view Holy bible lays down “Wives submit yourself into your own husbands as unto the Lord.”

The person I chose to interview was my parent’s. My dad and my mom have been married for twenty-one years.