Process Essay – How to Name a Cow

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Process Essay – How to Name a Cow

Naming your cow may not be an easy task. While some claim to be well versed in bovine nomenclature, many first-time cow owners are not. It may be true that cattle should not be named because a growing attachment to your cow may hinder economic gain—if you plan to eat your cow, don’t name it.

Most cow lovers need not worry about any of this. Their cows have become welcome household pets. They have put down their steak knives and decided to dine with them, not on them. Such docile animals have now become a part of the family, and owning but a few cows has eased the problem of naming a vast herd of cattle.

I once knew a family in Loma Rica that tried to name all their
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Traditional names are simple. So if you own a traditional cow, name her Bossy, or Bessy, or Daisy, or Lulu, or Buttercup, or Bertha, or Bubba, or Beauregard. Also keep in mind that traditional names vary geographically. For instance, I found that Brunhilde, Lore, Lotte, Rosa, Thilde, and Lisa are commonly given to cows in Germany. Other common European names include Peppo, Maxi, Moriz, and Marla. (A foreign name will add spice to any pasteurized cow.)

Another easy approach to cow christening is naming your creature after a famous or inspiring figure. Music, sports, or movie stars are a great source. Classic examples are Elvis, Jordan, and Winona. Or how about celebrities Aristotle, Einstein, or Thurgood Marshall? If you have several cows, name them after the characters of the infamous O. J. trial: Shapiro, Ito, Cochran, Kato. “This is my cow, Juror #12.” What better way to keep tradition alive?

From flowers bloom excellent cow names: Rose, Violet, Dahlia, Marigold, etc. However, it is wise to avoid cruel names. Don’t breed animosity by naming your animal Big Mac, Milk Shake, Sir Loyn, or Rump Roast.

Parents sometimes select an ample supply of potential names for their offspring, and more names are introduced by friends and relatives. What better use of this surplus than towards your cow? In fact, this is just one reason so many people are investing in cows—cows are an outlet for the names
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