Rainbow Rowell, In Eleanor And Park, Tackles The Issue

Divorce is not only difficult for parents, but even more difficult for the children. It can hit hard and fast but can also be built up from long term damage and stress on the marriage. Children can view their parent’s divorce in multiple ways. They can visually see it, or they can hear it. Children may also not view the divorce at all. Divorce can be sudden, confusing, and hidden. It can be a quick and relieving process, or it could be slow and painful. The relationship could be fought for night after night with little progress being made. The marriage could be fought verbally or even physically. Hurtful words are thrown to bring an end to the relationship and caring words are thrown to keep the marriage alive.

However, even the parents themselves do not seems to take into consideration the devastation that can impact their children. Some researchers argue that people do not terminate their marriages for reasons of escaping a disruptive relationship or abuse but only for a quest for personal growth, (Amato, Sep. 2001), then the issue should be the concern for the well being of the child and what that separation and subsequent divorce would affect the children. That same research also included a longitudinal study and incorporated evidence that indicated that a majority of recent divorces were not preceded by an extended period of

Retrieved from http://go.galegroup.com/ps/i.do?p=PPPC&sw=w&u=oakv28633&v=2.1&it=r&id=GALE%7CA14710446&asid=7ab637047d6fda8554d9590a67f5b3b3 This article explains how does divorce effect children in numerous negative ways. In general fifty percent of marriages ends up in divorce and no matter what the case is, children always need and want both parents. Children often feel like they are no longer being wanted by their parents or children feel that maybe they are the cause of their parents getting a divorce. They often feel rejected.

American novelist, Barbara Kingsolver, in her excerpt, “Stone Soup”, taken from, High Tide in Tucson: Essays from Now or Never, recounts the outrageous view that society has on divorced families/homes. Kingsolver’s purpose is to impress upon readers that it is okay for families to stem away from the traditional, “Dad, Mom, Sis, Junior”, family. She creates a persuasive tone in order to get rid of stereotypes and judgments of marital issues held by her readers and society. Through the effective use of anecdotes, appeals, and passionate diction, Kingsolver establishes her claim that blended families can get through life happy and perfectly fine by themselves or with close friends and family.

The statistics for divorce in the 1990's suggest that nearly sixty percent of marriages end in divorce. Given this startling figure, the assumption can be made that many children will experience some effects caused by the life-changing event called divorce. What is it exactly about divorce that causes negative consequences for these children? In what ways will these children be effected? Will these effects show outwardly? I will attempt to uncover some of the complexities surrounding these psychological questions in the following text. The unsettling fact is: young children of divorced parents face great psychological challenges due to the environmental conditions and changes associated with divorce (Wolchik and Karoly 45).

This paper discusses the correlation of children with divorced parents and their ability or inability to have intimate relationships in their futures. In most cases, it depends on the age of the child at the time of the divorce. Studies showed that marital problems, including but not limited to divorce, was associated with negative social, emotional, and physical affects in the children’s lives. Most articles included have different types of specific details, but all generally have the same outcome, being that children with divorced parents love differently than those that have parents happily married. Similar studies surveyed college students and discovered that children with fathers, who divorced and remarried, did not have a close relationship, which made these children more likely to avoid relationships. This literature review discusses the impact that divorce has on children who have or do not have relationships because of what happened to their parents’ relationships.

In today’s society, divorce is on the rise and has been for the past few decades. As the rate increases, so does the rate of remarriage. If there is a child whose biological parents divorce and remarry, the increase of stepfamilies occurs as well. This concept is the concept of what the reading this week connects to in the stepfamilies chapter of Floyd and Morman’s (2014) book. This chapter has truly spoken to me as a child of a remarriage by the age of 8 and 14and how difficult it was growing up dealing with two different stepfamilies. Reading this chapter this week gave me some more insight into how I have communicated within my stepfamilies.

According to Oxford Dictionaries (n.d.), Divorce is ‘”the legal dissolution of a marriage by a court or other competent body; legally dissolve one's marriage with someone.” Throughout the twentieth century, the family dynamics have drastically changed. During the course of the twentieth century the family unit has been impacted by the countless amounts of marriages ending in divorce (Hiller & Recoules, 2013, p 77). For one to be able to fully understand how the topic of divorce relates to marriages, families, and blended families one must examine the cost of divorce has on the family unit. The core of this paper will examine the cost of divorce and the effects it has on the children within the family unit. The paper is organized as follows.

Smells of fried chicken, collard greens, and peach cobbler wafted up from the Church kitchen and filled the sanctuary in preparation for the wedding celebration and mingle with the scent of purple, pink, and white flowers. White ribbons hung neatly at the end of each bench, pink to mark the bride's side of the church, and white to mark the groom's. Two teenage girls, meeting each other for the first time just a week previous, sat motionless on a front pew on the groom's side of the church, aware that they were strangely connected to each other and that this day marked the addition of new foreign relationships. As both stared blankly forward at the spectacle unfolding before them, the bride in her white gown, the groom in his tux, the pageantry, the play, one of them expelled a deep sigh that resonated for the both of them as she matter-of-factually stated, “Gee, I hope this one works.” The other girl nodded in agreement. The marriage resulting from that wedding only lasted for three years, and the groom would go on to marry again. The nodding head girl was me and the prophetic girl was my step-sister from one of my father's previous marriages. Divorce is considered one of the most stressful and traumatic events in a person's life. In the Extended Family Life Cycle, Constance Ahrons outlines the effects of Divorce on a family system and on the individuals within that system.

Landsford talked about multiple aspects of how a divorce affects a child. Throughout the article Landsford mentions the importance of not having much conflict amongst the parents because it impacts the child the most. Not only does conflict cause issues with the child, but so does many other things like income and love from the parents. When there is consistent negativity the outcome could be a result of a child being disobedient and rebellion. Landsford’s conclusion about divorce overall suggest that divorce can be difficult for the child to get use to doesn’t usually impact the child in a positive manor. Many children have struggles in school, friendships, and even relationships with the parents (Landsford 2009). Children at a young age may

Johnson et al. also conforms another task which is to form intimate and differentiated relationships with peers. They are also jointing the workforce and developing working identity and gaining financial independence. However, according to Hughes (n.d) the emotional turmoil of their parents’ divorce can make it difficult for them to focus on a career or form friendships. Hughes added that making life-altering decisions in this stage of the life cycle can be extremely difficult for the men and women of divorce.

These include academic deterioration, antisocial and delinquent behaviors, anxiety, low self-esteem, and depression. Early promiscuity, relationship difficulties, and illicit drug use are also noted. Other studies correlate resiliency in adulthood as one product of living in a conflictual family system”(Rich et al., 2007 p.164). The effects of divorce vary depending on the situation and the child. “Hess and Camara found that many children of divorce suffer severe emotional consequences such as depression, anger, anxiety, and withdrawal, any of which, if prolonged, can have a negative impact on the child’s overall emotional development. It is also reported adjustment problems in the area of cognitive, emotional, and social development among children of divorce as well. In addition, parental separation has been found to be particularly stressful for adolescents”(Bornstein and Walters, 1988 p.248).

One of the biggest effects of divorce is the effect it has on our children. Most couples get married and have children shortly after, and all decision made by the couples directly affect their children. Studies show that divorce has one of the most negative effects on children. Children living in single parent homes are more likely to be pregnant as teenagers, drop out of high school, abuse drugs and have behavioral issues. Furthermore due to the high dropout rates of single parent children they often have hard times finding jobs due to their lack of education. Often times we will see that children from broken homes will also have issues maintaining long term relationships as well. Studies show that children who parents are divorced or separated marriages will end in divorce as well. One last scary effect of divorce is that 92 percent of inmates in California State correctional facilities are products of single parent homes; in other words at some point when they were children their parents either divorced or became separated.

Divorce is a plague that is destroying numerous families across the United States of America. Sadly, when husbands and wives divorce, the children are often caught directly in the middle. Throughout the years divorce has been becoming more and more common. In the 1920's it was a rare find to know a person whom had been divorced, today it is a rarity not to know of one who has been, or will be divorced. Divorce has numerous effects on the structures of families, and many devastating effects on the children that must experience it, although sometimes necessary, divorce radically changes the lives of adolescents and adults alike.

Kelly (2003) is critical of some early literature by Wallerstein and Blakeslee (1989), arguing that these were biased and influenced public perception, with a ‘persistent emphasis on pathology’ (Kelly 2003, p 240). Other studies on divorce are more robust and ‘challenged the belief that divorce alone was the cause of children’s poor well being’ Kelly (2003 p.240) citing Cherlin et al (1991). This may account for the greater acceptance of the variety of modern families. Because divorce is so common, children no longer wish to be typecast as ‘children of divorce’ (Flowerdew & Neale, 2003, p. 158). It is these stigmas that could have negative connotations for the child as well as the parent; these stigmas in themselves may prevent children from adjusting if they feel that they are being judged.