Conceptual Framework Of Forgiveness Essay

As I was reading the chapter on forgiveness in Psychology, Theology, and Spirituality in Christian Counseling by McMinn (2011), the personal life experience that jumped out to me was when I had to make the decision to truly forgive my ex-boyfriend and his parents for the emotional pain they caused me. After living in New Jersey for a month and spending time with my boyfriend and his family, working, and taking care of an elderly lady with dementia my world came crashing down on me. My ex-boyfriend’s parents discovered sin in his life and told me I could no longer pursue a relationship with him because of the sins he had committed. After finding out the sinful things my ex-boyfriend had done, I chose to forgive him. I also chose to give him a second chance at a relationship with me, but my effort to salvage our relationship was futile.

Forgiveness has a different context depending on where the person is from or what he believes. Religion places a great emphasis on the view of forgiveness.

Forgiveness have important medicinal effect on health. Researchers and study have shown that people who forgive have less chances of health issues like heart attack and brain tumor. “People who hold tolerance views of human nature and don’t seem to nurse grieveness unduly tend to have blood pressures in the normal range” (Callwood, J. 2007, p. 153). Writer in the above findings tells her readers the medicinal effect of tolerance. She beautifully explains the positive effect of forgiveness in contrast with unforgiveness where her contrasting finding says “Unforgiving people, some studies show, are three times more likely to have heart diseases as people who don’t carry grudges”(Callwood, J. 2007, p.153). Writer here is addressed to people who cannot or do not forgive and tells them how harmful holding grudges are to their health. She beautifully explains the finding by telling first the negative effect of not forgiving in comparison to

It is also vital to look at Wilson’s view on the practice of forgiveness and how if an individual decides to ignore it, it can place a road block in their process of change. She believes that God speaks about forgiveness for the following reasons:” (1) we are all sinners with whom to relate so we’ll need to become skillful forgivers (2) God makes forgiveness a centerpiece of our healing process because living in un-forgiveness is so much worse (Wilson, 2001).

In the book Rediscovering the Power of Repentance and Forgiveness, Dr. Leah Coulter seeks to challenge the conventional Christian approach to forgiveness. Conventional Christianity approaches forgiveness as a Christian duty, and, in many ways, this has been unfair to the victims who have almost been condemned for seeking justice rather than simply forgetting. She asks, "From an all too common Christian view, why must the weight and responsibility of forgiveness be placed on the sinned-against instead of the sinner's repentance?" (Coulter). Therefore, she focuses extensively on the idea of repentance and the duty of the sinner to repent. However, that is not to suggest that Coulter abandons the idea that forgiveness is a Christian imperative, but she attempts to place it within its Jewish context, and demonstrate how other facets of historical Judaism inform the practice of forgiveness and repentance.

Most religions are in support of forgiveness. Yet, the circumstances for permitting forgiveness vary across religions. Religions other than Christianity advocate forgiveness under certain conditions. As in forgiving someone can only be done if certain amends are made by the offender. Christian believers are more autonomous in the support of

“Those who use forgiveness in counseling because it helps people feel better often acknowledge the religious meaning of forgiveness” (McMinn, pg.

Hesburgh explains, “My whole instinct is to forgive. Perhaps that is because I am a Catholic priest. In a sense, I am in the forgiving business… I think of God as the great forgiver of sinful humanity” (169). Prager further explains these religious divides, “It is only meant to explain why to Jews it is so patently obvious that it is morally wrong to forgive a man who has burned families alive, and to Christians it is equally obvious that one ought to” (230). Buddhism also argues for forgiveness as well. Ricard states, “For a Buddhist, forgiveness is always possible and one should always forgive” (235). Lastly, there is an argument that without forgiveness it is difficult to move on to the future. Tutu succinctly states, “Without forgiveness, there is no future.”

Forgiveness has been defined in many ways by psychologists and researchers with no one universal definition. Hill (as cited in Maltby, Day and Mackaskill 2001) state that it is widely agreed that forgiveness involves a willingness to abandon resentment, negative judgement and indifferent behaviour towards the person who has hurt them Although research is recent, from the last 15 years, it has helped develop our understanding of forgiveness . Research has shown that forgiveness gives positive mental health and prevents the development of mental disorders such as anxiety, depression and stress. Two major models of forgiveness are Enright’s model and Worthington’s (2001) pyramid model to REACH forgiveness. Both these models involve steps and

Forgiveness, while not only Christian, is a belief and practice that almost all Christians hold. Jesus displayed forgiveness in a variety of parables such as the “Lost Son” in Luke 15 and in his life, like when he forgave his persecutors in Luke 23. If we are to aspire to live in a way like Jesus did, then forgiveness needs to be regarded as a positive step to take. Through a case story by Stacy Banerman, we can see how the absence of forgiveness leads to a cycle of violence that will continue as people seek to justify their blame. Stacy Bannerman’s tragic story about the effects of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) on her husband displays the unbearably hard aftermath of losing everything.

After reading your outline I got a little teary eyed at the conclusion when you said “Amaya understands now why I was always gone and she forgiven me which is what I needed…her forgiveness.” I like the happy ending! Your topic is very emotional and heartfelt. The outline is very organized, all your paragraph topics relate back to your thesis. Your introductory paragraph catches my attention and the purpose is clearly conveyed. I can’t imagine PCSing and then deploying soon after especially with a family. Your conclusion is well written and I like the ending on a positive note. Overall I think you have an interesting topic and can understand the message you’re conveying. Good Luck on your

In general, self-forgiveness is identified by a common ability to exhibit self-respect in spite of the acceptance of wrong-doing (Hall, J., Fincham, D., 2005). I never considered the distinction between interpersonal forgiveness and intrapersonal forgiveness. While they share many similarities, there is even greater evidence of the differences between the two. One significant difference involves the consequences of withholding forgiveness from self. It is likely that intrapersonal unforgiveness can be much more detrimental than interpersonal. Hall & Fincham state “ Self-forgiveness often entails a resolution to change” (2005). It is this process of acceptance of one’s own imperfections and sinful nature that catapults a desire for self-improvement and growth. This is a critical component of healing the soul and beginning the journey to spiritual and mental health. Also enlightening was the declaration that one can experience pseudo self forgiveness by failing to acknowledge any wrong doing and convincing him/herself that they are without fault. Finally, I was struck by the notion that self-forgiveness will typically

Asking for forgiveness and forgiving to many is the hardest thing to do but we must remember in the book of Matthew (18:21-22) Peter said to the Lord: “Lord if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?” Jesus said to him, “Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times.” In this paper, the chosen case study will give the reader a better understanding of what forgiveness is to Jesus. Forgiveness is a big part of the Bible and if Jesus forgives us of our sins we too must learn to be as forgiving as him.

Reconciliation is a communal activity that is, firstly, linked with God through the priest, unlike Jainism; secondly, repeatable as often as necessary, unlike Judaism; and is less of a physical balancing with the world and more of an atonement for the wrongdoings the sinner did unto those around them as well as done towards God, unlike Taoism. All of these religious atonement rituals, however, point to the fact that human beings are erring creatures that need to be forgiven of impurities in order to better themselves on a spiritual level. From China to the Middle East and as far West as the globe will spin, human beings share an inert desire to right themselves with whatever moral system they have in place through their own religious belief systems. In essence, there is a need for humans to both seek forgiveness from others as well as forgive one another in the

Forgiveness is a hard thing to give because forgiveness of another human being involves having you to forgive yourself. It seems a lot easier to withhold forgiveness and remain a victim. The forgiveness that I have given away or I have received has shaped who I am today, therefore becoming a part of me.