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Revision Memo On The Classroom

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Revision Memo

I used the feedback from tutoring, model assignments, and Grammarly. I used Grammarly to check for any grammar, spelling, punctuation, passive voice errors; and to improve sentence beginnings. I used a thesaurus to replace any weak phrases, to receive better transitional phrases. One large scale change that was made throughout the revision is reorganizing my sentences in order to get a better flow and connection between the sentences, this change was suggested by a tutor in the Writing Center. One piece of feedback that I received that I disagree with is to write out the essay before revision, This was implicit from the instructor, I do not think this is effectively important unless there is a small time schedule. One …show more content…

Moreover, there is an environmental focus. People are anxious about their irrational fears as a result of the environment, they develop their fear. While I believe that an irrational fear can have a mental reason. Nevertheless, it connects to an environmental reason, due to not having control of a situation, something that is not only mental also environmental, simultaneously.
On the “environment” side of the argument strongly believes that irrational fear is due to the environment in which people develop their fears. One defender of this argument is Allegra Ringo, the author of the article, “Why Do Some Brains Enjoy Fear?”, claims that to actually enjoy a terrifying situation we must acknowledge that are in a safe environment. It is the fight-or-flight response experience, but in a safe environment that drives people to scare themselves. According to Ringo, a number of people enjoy terrifying situations due to the aura of confidence obtained after it is over. She talks about how it is only recently that people are scaring themselves for fun. Before then, it was a way to control behavior, encourage an agreement between groups, and to prepare kids for life. But, self-scaring is not for everyone, either considering psychological or personal reasons (Ringo 2). Since irrational fears can practically become linked with anything to a fear response via classical conditioning, if a child is too young to understand that some threats are fake,

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