Secure Attachment Style Analysis

The attachment style that an individual exhibits as an infant can affect their adult romantic relationships. An attachment pattern is established in early childhood attachments and continues to function as a working model for relationships in adulthood. This model of attachment influences how each of us reacts to our needs and how we go about getting them met. The ability to recognize one 's attachment can help someone to understand their strengths and vulnerabilities in a relationship.

Those with insecure attachments tend to have lower relationship satisfaction compared to those who are securely attached. Those who have a secure attachment style provide a caregiving role, their behaviors are responsive and sensitive, non-controlling and show interest during interactions. Secures are affectionate with touch, enjoy physical contact (intimate & sexual) and are willing to ask for support. Individuals with an insecure anxious attachment are more self-focused and always looking for approval and support from their partner regardless of low and high stress situations. Anxious attachment individuals are also over caring and hyper vigilant. Lastly, individuals with an avoidant attachment value independence and have low levels of self-disclosure. Avoidant individuals are less likely to use touch to express affection and are uncomfortable with intimate sexual contact. In short, being aware of your attachment style and your partners can shed light on marital conflict and possible solutions and corrective behaviors to better marital

They are not bothered by small issues. When a person has a secure attachment, they are capable of developing very trusting, and lasting relationships. They usually have good self-esteem also. They are comfortable sharing with their family and friends. Securely attached adults tend to have a good view of themselves, and their relationships with others. They feel comfortable balancing intimacy and independence, without any issues. This style of attachment usually results from a history of warm and responsive interactions with relationship partners. They often talk about experiencing more fulfilling relationships than people with other attachment styles. Being reliable and consistent, people who are secure may seem boring at first to those with other styles because there is little drama in their love lives, but secure people have a stabilizing effect on those with less secure styles and they report the highest level of satisfaction in their relationships.

Each attachment style is divided along two dimensions – the fear of abandonment and the fear of closeness. Bartholomew and Horowitz define fear of abandonment as the model of self which describes the belief of an individual to be either “worthy of love and support or not” (1991). They also define fear of closeness as the model of other which describes an individual’s

The insecure/preoccupied anxious attachment style preoccupied, and they seek approval from their partners. They tend to extremely clingy; consequently, pushing the person away with their self-doubts and insecurities. Individuals who have fearful/avoidant attachment style tend to have suffered abuse or sexual abuse, and they want close relationships, nonetheless they cannot bring themselves to be intimate with other people.

From class, I have learned four attachment styles, and these four attachment styles are: Secure, Avoidant, Ambivalent, and Disorganized. We have seen a lot of different people who share different attachment styles. Also, there are people who fall all over the place within these relationship styles. However, the one that I found myself to be the most is the secure style. For example, in my relationship, I am a secure person, and I believe that my boyfriend is also secure. He is not one hundred percent secure, but he falls in that category the most. All relationships do go through some type of issue before they can finally make it. I have discovered that our relationship styles are secure based on how we treat each other. When something is wrong, we talk it out then we move on. One real

There are several different attachment styles. Secure is an attachment style when an individual feels confident and has trust in their relationship. Avoidant is an attachment style when an individual is unsure about getting into in a relationship. Anxious attachment style is where individuals demand closeness and have trust issues.

You have excellent points about the secure attachment style! Secure relationships are built on trust and confidence in one's self and others. I liked how you displayed a scenario about how a secure relationship is handled under stress. Instead of avoiding Bill, Sally confronted him with the issue. If she had another attachment style, she would have blown up in his face or stop talking to him and shut him out. However, since she has a secure relationship style, she confronted him about the issue with controlled anger. Secure people can become angry but their anger springs from hope. This confrontation will help them resolve the situation and relieve the tension between them!

Hendrix (1992) explains that since our memories from childhood are usually dim, it is often necessary to analyze present behavior patterns in order to understand how we moved through the early development. Based on that explanation, I came to the conclusion that I developed a secure attachment. One reason I believe I develop secure attachment is because I have the tendency to trust people easily, unless they have proven otherwise. When I meet a new person I often make a good first impression of him and assume he is a good person. It is usually often a person said or did something questionable that I start to mistrust him. Secondly, my parents would tell us how easily I got over after becoming upset with someone. I could not be mad at people for a long time. According to my parents, I would get spanked or scolded for poor behavior and I would leave the room sad or crying only to return a few minutes later and start talking with my parents like nothing had happened.

Main and Solomon devised the fourth attachment style which has been discussed in the John Bowlby theory. (Main and Solomon -

While attachment styles displayed in adulthood are not necessarily the same as those seen in infancy, research indicates that early attachments can have a serious impact on later relationships. For example, those who are securely attached in childhood tend to have good self-esteem, strong romantic relationships and the ability to self-disclose to others. As adults, they tend to have healthy, happy and lasting relationships. For more information, see this article on attachment styles.

Fraley (2002) completed a meta analysis of studies concerning attachment in order to investigate the level of attachment pattern’s continuity throughout life. The study indicated that there was a certain stability of the attachment pattern, and that the stability is independent of time. Even though it is theorized that a secure pattern will be likely to stay unchanged, it is still indicated that experiences such as bad relationships will be able to change the attachment pattern (Fraley,

The results that I got from the close relationship survey is a score of 3.89 on my attachment-related anxiety and my attachment related avoidance score is 3.00. This puts me in the secure region. The influences that made me have the secure attachment style is how my parents and grandparents would spend a lot of time with me when I was a baby. I was always around them and always taken care of. Especially my mother whom would pamper me a lot when I was a baby. I remember when I was younger, I was so scared of the dark that I would always go to my mom to calm me down. The style of when my parents took care of me when I was a baby influenced my secure attachment style.

He also suggests that 0-5 years is the critical period for a child to develop attachment with the primary caregiver. The primary care giver often time can be their mother. It is very important for a child to develop attachment in these years otherwise failure to do so can cause the child to suffer from irreversible developmental consequences. Such consequences can be reduced intelligence, increased aggression and attachment disorder.

At the beginning of the course the class was introduced the concept of attachment styles. Attachment styles are the types of behavior displayed in relationships shaped by a two-part set of basic assumptions, conclusion, or core beliefs about one’s self and others. In laymen’s terms it is how one person interacts with another either God, spouse, child, friend, or even self. There are four different types of attachment styles and they are: secure, ambivalent, disorganized, and secure. The relationship style that all should aspire to be a secure attachment style, however I would classify myself as having an ambivalent attachment style. This is the attachment style where I believe I am not worthy of love since I am flawed. It also takes the assumption that I will not be able to get the love I need without being angry or clingy.