Secure Attachment Style: Low Avoidance, Low Anxiety

As an adult people with dismissive avoidant attachment have the tendency to emotionally distance themselves from their partner. They deny the importance of loved ones and detach easily from them. They can shut down emotionally and are able to turn off their feelings.

Those with insecure attachments tend to have lower relationship satisfaction compared to those who are securely attached. Those who have a secure attachment style provide a caregiving role, their behaviors are responsive and sensitive, non-controlling and show interest during interactions. Secures are affectionate with touch, enjoy physical contact (intimate & sexual) and are willing to ask for support. Individuals with an insecure anxious attachment are more self-focused and always looking for approval and support from their partner regardless of low and high stress situations. Anxious attachment individuals are also over caring and hyper vigilant. Lastly, individuals with an avoidant attachment value independence and have low levels of self-disclosure. Avoidant individuals are less likely to use touch to express affection and are uncomfortable with intimate sexual contact. In short, being aware of your attachment style and your partners can shed light on marital conflict and possible solutions and corrective behaviors to better marital

They are not bothered by small issues. When a person has a secure attachment, they are capable of developing very trusting, and lasting relationships. They usually have good self-esteem also. They are comfortable sharing with their family and friends. Securely attached adults tend to have a good view of themselves, and their relationships with others. They feel comfortable balancing intimacy and independence, without any issues. This style of attachment usually results from a history of warm and responsive interactions with relationship partners. They often talk about experiencing more fulfilling relationships than people with other attachment styles. Being reliable and consistent, people who are secure may seem boring at first to those with other styles because there is little drama in their love lives, but secure people have a stabilizing effect on those with less secure styles and they report the highest level of satisfaction in their relationships.

Each attachment style is divided along two dimensions – the fear of abandonment and the fear of closeness. Bartholomew and Horowitz define fear of abandonment as the model of self which describes the belief of an individual to be either “worthy of love and support or not” (1991). They also define fear of closeness as the model of other which describes an individual’s

The insecure/preoccupied anxious attachment style preoccupied, and they seek approval from their partners. They tend to extremely clingy; consequently, pushing the person away with their self-doubts and insecurities. Individuals who have fearful/avoidant attachment style tend to have suffered abuse or sexual abuse, and they want close relationships, nonetheless they cannot bring themselves to be intimate with other people.

There are several different attachment styles. Secure is an attachment style when an individual feels confident and has trust in their relationship. Avoidant is an attachment style when an individual is unsure about getting into in a relationship. Anxious attachment style is where individuals demand closeness and have trust issues.

Attachment theory was originally proposed by Bowlby (1969) as an explanation of interpersonal relationships, with particular focus in his work on the parent-child relationships which are formed in early childhood. He noted that this was an evolutionary need within us as humans to form close attachments to improve our rate of survival (Bowlby, 1969). He later also theorized that these attachment styles would persist throughout life into adulthood (Bowlby, 1988). Further work on attachment theory by Bartholomew & Horowitz (1991) expanded on attachment styles and looked at the continuation of attachment style into adulthood. Using interviews with participants and the participants close friends they found evidence for four types of adult attachment styles: Secure, Preoccupied, Dismissing and Fearful (Bartholomew & Horowitz 1991). Further support for adult attachments styles is from Mikulincer & Shaver (2004) showing that attachments styles persist from childhood into adulthood demonstrating bowlby 's later hypothesis

The current literature review draws from a plethora of different sources that discuss attachment, and its implications toward future criminal behavior. Marshall, Hudson & Ward (1996) described the implications of secure or insecure attachment on future relationships, intimacy, and sexual deviancy. These researchers found a connection between insecure attachment, negative internal

After taking the quiz, I was surprised to find that I have a secure attachment style. I personally do not think how I was raised contributed to this at all. The way I was raised was very avoidant. My parents didn't encourage me and I did not share my feelings with them often, or at all. I was constantly afraid of being made fun of by them so I didn't share my opinions or thoughts very often. I did not like it when they were mad at me, so I would try my very best to always be on my best behavior. I have been with my boyfriend for almost four years though and I feel like that has really effected my attachment style. He is very supportive and is aware of my needs to be reassured, so I do not often worry about him leaving me or not paying close

Barbara M. Newman and Philip R. Newman (2009) stated, “Infants who show an anxious-avoidant attachment avoid contact with their mothers after separation or ignore their efforts to interact” (pg. 153). Children will show less distress at being alone than other children, resulting with rejecting others. As the child get older, they will become distant and avoid connections with peers, and have a harder time forming relationships. Children with resistant attachment explore very little in their surroundings, and is very suspicious in front of strangers. Barbara M. Newman and Philip R. Newman (2009) stated, “Infants who show an anxious-resistant attachment are very cautious in the presence of the stranger” (pg. 153).

She experimented to find the way to determine the quality of attachment by measuring the intensity of separation anxiety, the child’s inclination to explore the room, the response to a stranger, and the way the way babies react with their caregivers return after leaving the room for a moment. Ainsworth concluded that the quality of attachment ranges from secure to insecure. Secure attachments show positive emotional bonds, like being upset when the caregiver leaves and wanting to be near the caregiver when he or she returns. Secure attachments lead to babies being more flexible and curious. As they grow up, the child will be better a problem solving and social skills.

Those that experience the other end of the spectrum, the avoidant attachments will be more likely to be in relationships of a casual nature, have no regard for personal relationships, may lie and cheat, not giving the relationship any value or merit at all. This type of behavior usually occurs in those that were not given care, commitment, or closeness from their caregivers. They can sometimes be aggressive, jealous, needy, and have an intense fear of rejection. They don’t feel that they can have a trusting or healthy relationship so it’s as if they try to sabotage it from the very beginning. They fear their partners may reject them so they tend to become the aggressors. Again, this behavior is characterized by the lack of attention given in theory formative years. With a better understanding of how our style initially developed, we can better learn how to modify it. An example would be a child who was initially in a household where the attachment was cold and rejecting, where the parent did not put the child first and acted like they wished the child had never been born. At some point due to divorce the child now ends up in a warm and responsive, supportive household where she is paid attention to and doted on. Her first years, although not the best , would certainly have a negative effect at first since this is all the child would have known but then going into another loving,

Attachment styles are ways people interact with themselves and with others. There are four types of attachment styles: secure, avoidant, ambivalent, and disorganized. The different types are determined by the way the individual thinks of themselves and of others. The ambivalent attachment style has a poor view of self and elevated view of others.

For example, I had friend who is ambivalently attached. She tends to desperately seek for attention from others. She was completely insecure and self-critical. She seek approval from others because she was afraid of being rejected from others and yet, she did not even trust others. This attachment style has completely affected her relationship.

Anxious/Preoccupied Attachment Style. Anxious adults would be preoccupied with the idea that the other person is not as attached as he/she is and would think what the reasons are and would be anxious about this situation. I suppose Bridget Jones from “Bridget Jones`s Diary” fit this category. High anxiety and low avoidance are typical for this category (“Attachment Styles: Overcoming Fear, Embracing Intimacy At Last”, 2012). Sometimes, they think they would scary