Professor Deborah Tannen wrote an essay entitled Sex, Lies, and Conversation. In the essay, Tannen states that men and women have different ways of communicating in a relationship(422). For women, she claims communication is very intimate; they want to know what their spouse is thinking or how they're feeling (422). She argues that men don't seem to think communication is that important unless it's in a public setting (421). Tannen also claims that some women feel alienated when they think men aren't listening. She argues that men tend to not fully focus on the conversation, while women would rather have a more engaging conversation. I think these arguments are pretty one sided because she states that men are the only ones that have a problem …show more content…
You can go to any schoolyard or playground and you will most likely see boys and girls playing within their gender groups. Additionally, you can also observe that when girls are playing, they tend to be sitting in groups, engaged in conversation by telling secrets and feel it's the foundation of friendships, while boys are usually running around or participating in a more physical activity. Women want the men in their lives to be more like their childhood girlfriends and share their thought and feelings so they can feel a closeness to their partners. I remember when I was in elementary school, girls during recess would sit on the benches laughing and talking to each other, while the boys played tag, basketball, dodge ball, or kickball. However, I do believe we become more inclusive as we get older. We start to realize that we are the same. We can like same things, and want same the same things. When I was 15 years old, I hung out with a pretty diverse group of people. We came from all different backgrounds, ages, and genders. It didn't matter who you were, as long as your nice and respectful, you were able to hang with
In the Article Sex, lies and conversation, Deborah Tannen asserts that men and women communicate differently because of their different training. One of the many things that can lead to miscommunication is divorce during her argument she provides us the trend of the divorce rate. She also mentions that Men and Women communicate differently, because they have different goals, body Language and how they were raised, and lastly when it comes to communicating women show more character when communicating like eye contact, and the fully attention. The evidence of her case is backed up by several other authors who also support that communication is different between men and women the authors’ point of view and their research that Tannen uses to prove
In Deborah Tannen’s essay “ Sex, Lies, and Conversation” she talks about the everyday differences between male and female conversation. She talks about how males and females communicate differently and how they differ physically when talking. I agree with the author's idea that males and females communicate differently because I notice it in my everyday life.This idea is important because it helps you realize these differences. The show I chose “ The Big Bang Theory” demonstrates these differences between males and females.
In the essay Sex, Lies, and Conversation Deborah Tannen focuses on the differences and lack of communication between men and women though observations. She came to the conclusion that men were not lacking in their listening, but they were however listening in a different way than the women did. On the other hand, men aren’t the only people that have terrible communication skills. In many ways, these differences between the two genders can cause major conflict when not understood by the opposite side. A few examples of lack of communication may be when women don’t decide where they would like to eat, men who walk away from an argument rather than talking it out, and their decision making processes.
The article traces the origins of this phenomenon to childhood, where young boys and young girls tend to play exclusively within their own gender. Children's development is most influenced by the social structure of peer interactions. The differences in childhood socialization result in a lack of understanding of the communication styles of the sexes. Boys and girls bond differently.
Allowing Boys and Girls to play together may build life long friendships, which results in a happier life. It is often stereotyped that girls are not as strong or not as fast as boys, and in some cases this is true but sometimes it’s not. A sport called CrossFit has been redefining what it means to “Play like a girl”. At my school, Girls can play football but Boys cannot play volleyball. I believe that if you do not allow boys and girls to play together, they might not develop social skills with the
The section starts by discussing how each gender is socialized, at a young age, to use communication differently. Girls typically play house, school, and other role playing activities, which encourages expressive, feeling based, and personal communication. Boys, on the other hand, typically play sports, war, or cops. This type of play encourages competitiveness, activeness,
In contrast, men want to talk about their hobbies, and share their experience about playing game. And Tannen's state: "Boys must struggle to avoid the subordinate position in the group.(p.330)" They want to be higher then anyone else in the group. As we can see, women want to be support and support each other as they are the same and men want to higher, even want to be the highest person in the group. So these things above tell us the reason why men and women are very hard to understand each
In the article "Sex, Lies and Conversation: Why is it so hard for Men and Women to Talk to Each Other?" by Deborah Tannen, she talks about how men and women have different ways of speaking to each other. She explains that men and women have different conversation patterns which can have an impact on relationships. She explains the many examples of how men conversate between people and women conversate between people. She talks about studies that have been done to show the difference between men and women when they speak. I feel like Tannen is right about how men and women can't conversate between each other like how they would if they were talking to their own gender.
In the article, “Sex, Lies, and Conversation” Deborah Tannen points out in her research that most women share secrets to form friendship and stays in one topic for a long period of time. Whereas men do less talking while jumping from one topic to another and more doing things together. Tannen also says that most couples can’t understand each other after years of togetherness. Through my observations, this proves her point accurate because most men and women conversations are very different from
2- While women are usually perceived as a more sensitive communicator in a given relationship, in Amato and Previti (2003), they rated “lack of communication” less far away (6.1%) than men (13%). How could this ironic situation be understood? (p. 346).
As a child growing up I found it easier to play and communicate with boys although I also played and communicated with girls the communication seem different and harder to understand. Boys were like let’s play ball or let’s play with my toy trucks and the playing would commence on the other hand when I played with girls they would say would you like to play house I would say sure reluctantly because I didn’t like this. Then we would have to figure out who was the mom or dad of course I would be the dad and off to work I would go then enter just about as soon as I would exit and say honey I am home what’s for dinner. My friend would say pizza and we would begin eating she would talk and talk and I would listen. This was so boring for me and
Boys might fear to be too aggressive with a girl on the field and might feel more comfortable playing in the Same sex. Some boys are scared playing against a girl because they might trip them or injure them. So they just let the girl score a point. Sometimes a boy might fall into their crush and be embarrassed. Boys and girls feel more comfortable playing in the same
Then, you have the perception where females have to only take part in the feminine activities. It was strong stereotypes were girls was only allowed to be cheerleaders, dancers, writers and poets. While on another hand boys are the basketball, football and soccer players. The same way goes for the academics where better at reading and writing while the boys are better at numbers and chemicals. Majority of these stereotypes are not even legit especially when it comes to the academics.
Communication is key, misunderstanding and conversation is what every relationship you ever created evolved from. Debrah Tannen, the author of “Sex, Lies and Conversation”, entails multiple couple stories of men and women fighting purely because they’re misunderstood. None the less, everyone has their likes and differences, it’s not just men and women.
Problem: When men are silent, women think that men don’t love them; men often accuse women of talking too much and her continual talk about problems as a plea for solution.