Sex Without Love by Sharon Old Essay

1100 Words 5 Pages
Sharon Olds’ poem “Sex Without Love” wonders at the ability for two people to have sex and not involve emotions or pretenses of love. The poem argues that it is better to have sex without love under the premise that love is a false savior for people, and everyone is all alone anyhow. In other words, the claim is that personal interactions do not serve a purpose other than being a distraction, and they will inevitably end. However, the notion that attachment and love are false hopes for people and each person is all alone does not account for the inevitability of human interactions and the underlying importance of relationships. While the poem does not give its definition of being alone, complete isolation is virtually impossible and leads …show more content…
The participants do not engage in amateurish relations, but instead engage in the activity of sex with expertise. The poem’s descriptions label them as being individuals worthy of admiration.
One of the poem’s main premises as to why having sex is superior to making love is that the participants are not giving in to a “false Messiah” (15). People who claim to be in love or fawn over their sexual partners are missing the true point of the intimate act. The notion of a false Messiah, which is love and affection, argues that love is not a true savior for people, and it is more of an imposter of happiness. The poem states that when people extract love from the act of sex, each person does not mistakenly love the mediator of satisfaction, but instead focus on praising the true “God”. If one spends so much time admiring a person, he or she will ultimately be disappointed or lose time with the real goal of sex. In the words of the poem, to be attached to the person one is having sex with would mean to “mistake the lover for their own pleasure” (17). He or she would then fail in their endeavors to reach true satisfaction.
According to the poem, the reason why emotional attachment is a false savior is because everyone is ultimately alone. The poem says those who do not engage in deeper relationships know the truth of life, which is that every person is “alone in the universe / against its own best time” (23-24). Relationships are not what makes life important,
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