Sibling Rivalry

In life people are often compare each other for relative success, and so often and conveniently siblings are compared to each other. We see this comparison in Christiana’s Henriquez’s novel, The Book of Unknown Americans with the characters of Enrique and Mayor. Between the two brothers, one has clearly accomplished more great feats in his parents’ eyes, him being Enrique. Throughout the book the accomplishment of Enrique is felt acts as a burden towards his younger brother, Mayor. Mayor, try as he might, is not his brother and this is seen through Mayor failures to meet the standards of Enrique presented in the book. There is a sibling rival between the brothers created by their father Rafael Toro. An advancement of knowledge on the subject of sibling rivals can help us to further understand the situation of the brothers, by examining the studies of some scholars on the effects older siblings have on the younger siblings. Rebecca Webber’s “Two Sibling, One Spotlight” focus on how the older sibling set the goals for the younger siblings. Zeng-yin Chen and Ruth X. Liu work “Comparing Adolescent Only Children with Those Who Have Siblings on Academic Related Outcomes and Psychosocial Adjustment” research allows for an insight of real life academics of only and children with siblings generalized results in an academic test; presenting a significant difference between the two. Jensen, Alexander C. and Susan M. McHale “What Makes Siblings Different? The development of Sibling Differences in Academic Achievements and Interest” argues that more academically successful older siblings generate higher expectation of parents to push the younger sibling to achieve similar academics goals. Though most of the data indicate that the older sibling usually outperforms the younger siblings – academically - I will argue, this sibling rivalry is not a negative but rather if anything is positive for the younger sibling.

My brother, sister, and I fight all the time, but sometimes we get along. Everyone fights with people. Just turns out that sibling fight a lot more. In the book The Watsons Go to Birmingham-1963 by Christopher Paul Curtis two African American brothers fight a ton. When Kenny and Byron fight or disagree it means they have differences. Even though it might not seem like it, they also have similarities.

During the 1950s and 1960s, which is the time period of the novel, the average number of offsprings each couple had was larger than it is today. The 21st century siblings have less competition for parental affection, which creates a better bond between the siblings, and a more appealing look in front of peers and adults, instead of having an irritable disposition. The smaller probability of multiple siblings leads to adolescents that are capable of handling relationships with peers, since they weren’t treated with any injustice, that they’d think to embody on

In general, most people do not like to get themselves involved each others problems, especially when there is problems at home. For one reason or another, the sibling who witnesses another sibling being treated poorly, such as getting yelled at, does not want get

What is the joy of having a sibling? Is it that you always have someone to beat up on? Or is it you have someone to express all your feelings to, knowing they aren’t listening or understanding it? Siblings can sometimes be there for you, for anything that you may need. Siblings are supposed to get along, but there are a big handful that don’t. Many siblings fight over redundant things such as who gets the higher quality clothing items. This rivalry shows up in the short story, “The Scarlet Ibis” by James Hurst--and it does not have a very satisfying ending.The story is full of symbolism and it teaches us to cherish every little moment with our siblings and be grateful that we have them in our lives.

Rivalry is often associated in competition including sports, events, and mostly a trait that seems siblings are born with. The urge to be the best at something or to be noticed is commonly seen in children, especially the ones similar in age that always strive for attention. In this story, Wolff includes

My mom and her boyfriend at the time, would continue to argue nearly every day. It got to the point, to where I tried running away from the apartment multiple times, of course, I never succeeded. At the age of 10 I experienced fighting between my dad and step-mom. In the beginning I thought it was only a 1-time thing. But as it continued, I realized it wasn’t. Me, having to deal with fighting before, stepped- in to break up the fight to protect my siblings. The fights were always verbal, but I didn’t want my siblings to witness what I have had to many times before. I would take my siblings downstairs, my little sister being 3 years younger than me, and my brother by 10 years. I hoped it would at least help them, instead of developing a corrupted

It is common for parents and their children to have disagreements and to have arguments but sometimes these disagreements can turn into abuse. Children usually use violence to try to “control or bully them” (Parenting and Child Health, n.d.) This violence usually occurs when the child “frightens, threatens or physically hurts them. It can involve using abusive language, pushing, shoving, kicking, throwing things, or threatening with knives or other weapons” ((Parenting and Child Heathen’s.) Children may abuse their parents due to the normalization of that parent getting abused by the other parent within their household. The child may use the parent that abusing the other parent as a model for the way they should act towards their parent as well and justify their actions simply as something that they observed in their household. The violence that children commit against their parents affects that subsystem because it leaves it broken. There is a strain within the parent and child relationship that forms a direct result of constant conflict and abuse between the child and parent. Sometimes, in child-child relationships, an older sibling may become “more aggressive” with their younger sibling because of the abuse that they have witnessed and been exposed to. (Fantuzzo, Mohr, 1999) The children can become socialized by the parents to believe that

When I was younger my brothers and I would fight over the attention and gratitude of my parents. From reading the Stories of brothers in the Bible I have discovered that brothers have been fighting ever since the beginning of time. Through the stories of Cain and Abel, and Jacob and Esau I have determined that Brothers stories are one of childhood ignorance and desire to obtain everything. Once adolescence has turned to adulthood, brothers seem to reform there ways toward each other due to the realization that you don’t need to have everything to obtain happiness.

The issue of sibling rivalry in families is one of the main topics within Bettelheim’s article.

The impact of parent-child relationship, marital conflicts and the nurturance environment on child development has been a focus of literature since a considerable time period. Recently, researchers have concentrated on the role of sibling relationship quality on the overall development of an individual (Brody, 1994). This area is studied by examining a number of factors such as sibling warmth and conflict, the number, age and gender of siblings, personality of individuals along with the role of parents and several other facets. The findings are inconsistent and there are a number of variables which are seen to affect the behavior and the development of an individual.

“Sibling relationships in particular are among the longest lasting and most influential relationships in an individual’s lifetime” (Shalash 288). Relationships with siblings definitely affects emotions. Emotions vary when it comes to siblings; they can range from anger and jealousy to joy and gratefulness. Siblings can go from calm and loving while spending time together to fighting physically or verbally within moments. With multiple siblings, favorites are often chosen by parents or siblings so the other siblings may feel like an outcast. When two families are combined different routines can cause great conflict. If a child faces conflicts continuously with their family it can make complications for their love life.

However in some cases, several individuals consider their siblings as opponents or rival in getting the things that they want. Some think that their sibling hinders them from achieving their goals and prevent them from being fortunate. That is where sibling rivalry takes place. (Stein 2002)

When there is more than one child in a family, there can be sibling rivalry whether through fighting, jealousy or comparison. It is common when this issue arises that it can develop even more through adulthood. Sibling rivalry happens day and night and is very hard to deal with. Sibling rivalry is when one child or more try to compete with one another or try their best to be like each other. Rivalry is very different than fighting. It is rooted in the heart of a child who is trying to win love and affection from one or both parents.

The family unit across the globe is valued by almost all cultures as the most important social structure in which humans form the tightest bonds. Now significant evidence to suggest that within the family structure the relationship and interaction between siblings is the most impactful relationship of a human’s lifetime. Researchers have only recently become interested in the unique relationship between siblings. Siblings have been found to advance one another’s social, emotional, and cognitive development (Mcguire and Shanahan, 2010). Researchers are now are posing the question, “Are our relationships with our siblings the most important of all?”