I opened the pills. It was one of those pill bottle things that you need to push hard and twist. The pills were red and white. I got a handful of them. I took a gulp to clear my throat. The clear cup of water was next to me. I looked in the mirror and I was thinking. Should I really do this? Am I going to let go of my life? At the age of 15? Here we go…..*sighs*
Age 12. I was a happy girl until I found out my dad only had less than a year to live, due to cancer. I did everything with him. He taught me how to live life and taught me things. How to ride a bike without training wheels, how to cook ramen noodles, and how to read a book. My mom always works. So I barely see her. She tells me goodnight and after that I sleep. I wake up and I don’t
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We got to see my dad but he looked so depressed. I could see it in his eyes. I fed him hospital food. It was hard for him to even sit properly but he was able to budge. Me and my mom were sitting in the chairs next to his bed. My parents were both sleeping, but I was just on my phone texting Piper that my dad's alright. A few seconds later I hear my dad coughing. I tried to wake up my mom. She's a deep sleeper so I went to go get a doctor or someone. A doctor came and he got his stethoscope and put it on my dad's chest. Finally my mom woke up after all the nurses and doctors came in. I was against the wall and I was just staring at my dad. I could just see him struggling to breath. The heart monitor keeps beeping, then all of a sudden it was just a straight line. The noise of the machine was filling the room. My head was pounding and everything was unclear. One nurse got the paddle thing that shocks the person for them to be alive again. They put it to 200. It didn't work then they tried 300. Beeeep…… all I could hear is my mom crying and crying. She was yelling at everyone.
“YOU DIDN'T EVEN
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She’s on the the ground pounding the floor. Screaming at everyone saying it was everyone's fault of my dad's death.
*The next day* My mom was in her room. At 2:00 in the afternoon. I could hear her sobbing and crying. I was just in my room on my laptop looking pictures of our family. I was really hungry. I went downstairs and made ramen, for me and mom. I went back upstairs and knocked on my moms door.
“Mom, do you want some ramen, I cooked some food for you.”
“NO, DO YOU SEE ME? I'M TRYING TO REST AND OF COURSE YOU HAVE TO RUIN EVERYTHING! GET OUT OF MY LIFE”
I was in shock of the word that came out of my mom's mouth. I went back into my room and ate my ramen noodles. Slowly, just staring at the wall. It was 5:00 in the afternoon. Our house was a complete mess. Clothes everywhere, food, And just everything around the house. To be honest I don't even know how all these stuff get in here. For the past few days my mom was just in her room sobbing, having my dad's clothes on her bed smelling them. I was scared to walk in the room because I know she would yell at me and scream these horrible things that I know she don't mean. I took a deep breath. *opens the creaky door, while
As i got home from riding on the school bus i ran into my driveway then into my house.I had let out a strong yelp for my mom i heard no response back, i was confused and thought in my head ( were had my mom gone i know she doesn’t have work to day neither any arrens today,then where could my mom be?)Just as i was about to let out another yelp my sister came down stairs,she knew exactly what i was going to ask her.
I had lacrosse practice on the hottest day of summer. The best day was going to jump off a cliff and die. Practice was done and I was hungry for food. I got in my mom’s car and asked my mom to go somewhere and get some food. We went to Taco Bell. I finished and was ready to go home and get a shower. We were going down the road and suddenly my mom got a phone call from my aunt. As soon as my mom started to talk to my aunt she started to cry and break down. She
Have you seen my husband? Is all my mom was shouting as she held my hand tightly, running back and forth through the hospital? A receptionist sent us to a room, which felt like coming into an isolated mausoleum. The cold air enveloped my entire body, ice has replaced my spine and numbness is all my fingers felt. The room was somber dark, dead silence; the only sound heard was the heart machine ... Beep … Beep. There wasn’t anything more traumatizing then seeing my father lain on the bed, unresponsive, tubes coming from out mouth and nose. The sadness and desperation in his eyes broke my heart. All of sudden the heart monitor went off with a loud buzzing sound. A nurse jumped out of nowhere “Code Blue”, in matter of seconds 4 nurses and a doctor surrounded my father, my mom and I mindset was at a shock, like were able to see what was happening but couldn’t do anything our body was some glued to the floor. The doctors and nurses tired to help my father but it was too late,
I procrastinate for an hour or two but then push myself to do my homework. After 3 hours of hell, I finally completed all of it and decide to take a shower. Once I get out, I get out my speakers and begin to play 'I like it when you sleep for you are beautiful yet so unaware of it' probably one of the best albums ever released. Over all of the loud music I hear a loud bang from downstairs. I quickly shut off the music and wait to see if I will be able to hear the noise again. Yep, there it is. I swiftly open my door and walk downstairs and see my mom on a rampage. She screaming and throwing things and I am bewildered.
While standing in the laundry room, I watched my mother pace back and forth from the living room to the kitchen in a panic, waiting for a phone call which she knew may never come. Mom bolts to her bedroom to look in the hiding spot where all of the lethal medications my father was taking were hidden. The Medications powerful enough, if I took even one, my heart would stop within an hour. Mother and I knew exactly what he was going to try to do. He was going to try to kill himself.
They (my family and doctors), for the first night, weren’t sure if I would make it or not. I was touch and go, because my oxygen level couldn’t be stabilized. I would be on oxygen and my level would be normal, but as soon as they took me off, my level would fall again. However, they had to stabilize me before they could do any kind of surgery. During this time, I think my dad as well as everyone involved got a taste of what it means that any moment, any day could be anyone’s final moment. My dad stayed every night with me. The first night, my heart quit beating twice. The first time, my dad said, “She’s a fighter, she can get through this.”. Then it happened again and my dad fell on his knees saying, “God, please don’t take her now!”. I ended up practically living in SICU for 3½ weeks, just trying to become stable enough, so I could make it somewhere else. Both my mom and dad had to become durable power of attorneys, so they could decide what my treatments would
You could tell my brother was screaming as much as he could with his small little lungs. I quickly ran over to our tiny bathroom wondering what was going on. There you could see my little brother using all his force to hold up my mom who had fainted on our cement floor. Even with the two of us repeatedly yelling at her to wake up, her eyes stayed closed. I began to really worry. I ran over to her bedroom and scurried through my blanket looking for my phone. As my sister dialed 9-1-1, I ran back into the bathroom where my brother was sobbing. My sister had already called my aunts and cousins over. They were all trying to help wake her up. They called out her name multiple times. They also hovered rubbing alcohol under her nose, in hopes of her waking up. I let my brother know that everything was going to be fine and that the ambulance would be here in no time to help my mom. I was shaking as I sat next to my brother helping him hold up my mom. My older cousin took our spots and helped sit my mom up.
Everything bad that could have ever happened is happening now. So I responded mortified, “ Why?”. My dad said that she was with my grandfather at the hospital. Now, I know my mom is fine but what about my grandfather? My first reaction was maybe he asked her to go for one of his doctors appointments. I thought hard about what was happening, then
I couldn't believe what was happening. My dad turns to the doctor and says "What do you mean ICU?" That's when she tells us I have bleeding in my brain and that I can't eat or drink and need an IV right away. I'm still so mad at my dad to this day because he promised me I wouldn't need an IV. After they get the needle in, they put a bunch of medicine into me and said that it would make me a little weird. "A little weird" wasn't even close to what it did to me. I thought I was going to have to get moved in a mental hospital after taking that medicine. I couldn't spell or talk and when I did talk nothing I said made sense. People were constantly texting me and I didn't know what I was typing so everyone responded with "what is wrong with you?" Honestly at this point I had no idea. My boyfriend was still here and was laughing at me because of how crazy I sounded but I was honestly scared and thought I was going to be this way forever.
When I woke up a walk down stairs and I was wondering where my mom was because we are supposed to go to 6 flags today. I was so excited I couldn't wait. Then I ran up to my mom's room and there she is sleeping in her bed. I yelled WAKE UP we are supposed to go to 6 flags today. She said oh I forgot then we both jumped in the shower before we left. Then we were on our way to 6 flags. We left at 8:00am so she said we would be there at 10:00am. ZOOM!!! the car went by us in a flash. We barely saw it. Then my mom gave me a large box when we stopped at kwik trip. She said I couldn't open it till tomorrow. Then we got back on the road. I was listening to the music for most of the ride. Then there it was my favorite song was on. I told my mom to crank it up.
My mother and I did not have the best, mother daughter connection. We did not communicate as one would imagine. She did her things and I did mine, but one night something just wasn't right. As every normal day I would get up get ready for school come back home make food for my siblings do my homework and go to bed. That night it was all going so well until I got home, I was not feeling well, I felt anger within me and I didn't know why but my mother started screaming about some shoes on the floor some dishes and she just kept going and going I couldn't take it anymore, we started arguing so loud my siblings went to their rooms to hide I was so mad my teeth started chattering slowly and rapidly, a waterfall of sadness ran through my cheeks.
I had one uncle shot and killed on his way home from work. I was beaten up bad about that, but i was okay. Then i had another uncle who was killed in the midst of getting robbed, and i honestly wanted to give up on my life. I was really trying to hold myself together by playing baseball and trying to get this out of my head. The more i tried the harder it got for me. I had one more uncle who couldn't take the pain of losing his brother, so he hung himself and was in a coma for 2 months. That's when school was getting tough because i had to be in and out of the hospital, i was missing work from all my classes and i thought no one understood what i was going through.
Yesterday had been an awkward moment for Jane. How can one simple pill change a person behavior? She couldn't accept the truth that the pills can be magical, it's practically not possible science. "I think those two are pulling some kind of a weird joke on me. I don't find it very amusing." She laugh to herself. "Magical lust pill. Ha..they're not fooling me, I'm falling for their childish games."
It was a bone chilling January night; my mom received a call at about 11:15 PM, a call that changed my life forever. My Aunt June was on the other line. She was crying so hard my mother could barely understand her. Through the sobbing my mom finally understood that Brian, my cousin, had been in a horrible accident and she didn’t know how bad it was. My mother jumped out of the bed after she hung up the phone. She screamed up the stairs at my sister and me; it was a nerve shrilling scream. I could hear fear in her voice. My mom was always yelling at us growing up if we forgot to do something. She would even get us out of bed to finish something that wasn’t done completely. This particular
We all got into the car and immediately my sister was bombarded with questions. “Is he ok?”, “What happened?”, “Who is with him?” She answered each one to the best of her knowledge. She told us that his heart had stopped and started back up again, and that Mama (my Mom) and Papa (my Dad) were at the hospital with him. The car ride there was a very scary ride, because we were all so frightened by what had happened.