Sweetwater Case 5.07

This story captured my interest with the first chapter with a very dangerous situation and ending the chapter off with a cliff hanger, before going back in time to an earlier date. After the first chapter it goes back to show who Rennie is and his family past, how he got in that dangerous situation. Norah McClintock captured my attention with the setting of the story and the many characters with unknown backgrounds. My favorite character In the story is the corporal father McLean because of his care and growth over the course of the story. The host family has a mystery to them, there is death in the family

it retells the story too much and needs fixing but i think that i have almost done this with my final copy, please e-mail me on kippa_dog@hotmail.com if you can think of a better way of putting it.also, make sure that

The style of this story is simple and very engaging. It is simple because the text uses small words and it is easy to understand. With it being a mystery book it gives the readers a chance to be connected to Mike and Kate as they found out who the real suspect is. The book would be considered a classic mystery book, because there are many clues with more

Could you please make the amendments, remove my highlighted text, proof read and spell check your work and re-submit this unit by 19/10/15.

I really like how you researched Francisco Jiménez, the author of “The Circuit,” and I feel like it can help someone reading the story better understand the story as a whole. I also really liked how you related different parts of the story to parts of the author's life. Just one think you may want to change is to place commas inside of the quotes rather than after the quotation marks. Well done!

It was well written in predominantly complete sentences with correct grammar. A few sentences could have been split up or benefited from a semicolon, but this was negligible. It was a great piece.

Your writing skills are flawless. We mean it. You must have a savvy style and a firm grip on grammar.

The first step in the analysis was to categorize each patient by whether or not they passed the clinical threshold during their treatment and if their change was reliable. Clinical cutoff scores and Reliable Change Indexes (RCI) for the PHQ-9 and GAD-7 were obtained from past research [@Delgadillo2012; @Griffiths2015; @Kroenke2001; @Spitzer2006]. Clinical cutoff scores for the BASE-6 were obtained from unpublished pilot research and corresponded to the clinical cutoff of the commonly used OQ-45 measure.

The only thing I can mention is that the story could have done with one more run through for errors. The errors I found were easily spotted. They were not many, but it was enough to be worth mentioning.

I feel that she did a great job pointing out the differences. She wrote how her mother disregarded her feelings, didn't listen to her, and never spent time with her. In the end she wrote how: "Instead of following in my mother's footsteps, I have learned from her mistakes." This was a good transition, and then she gave examples of how exactly she parented differently. She also threw in a comparison of her relationship with her mother, and the television show Gilmore Girls. I feel this was an effective comparison, because the two relationships are exact

Your stories description of these two children trying to handle the death of their mother whilst also trying to understand the complexity of emotions and pain that brought on was very creative. I also feel that trying to write that kind of intricacy of human emotion is always a worthy goal and enjoyed reading Leslie and Dale’s heartfelt attempts at trying to keep living and loving each other.

I honestly love this story and found it very relatable. It hits home for me. Throughout the story you give the reader a sense of connection between Edi and LJ. You can tell she wants the best for her brother yet she is tired of him depending on her to bail him out of situations. I see that she doesn’t want to be a part of the reason why he goes down the wrong path that’s why she helps him out. The tone of the story and the language you used displays Edie has respect for brother for example” I tried to hold on to some kind of connection we have, something that would prove that we were more than blood relatives living our lives during two separate time periods.” What I loved the most is the fact that they have their own thing “Waking me up by

5. I think the story is depressing. "Shocks you, my husband!" cried Georgiana, deeply hurt; at first reddening with momentary anger, but then bursting into tears. "Then why did you take me from my mothers side? You cannot love what shocks you. These couple sentences were stated in the novel, in my opinion, it shows that the novel contains sadness and makes it very depressing when you read it.

Craft wise, I thought that your use of internal dialogue and explanations balanced well with you telling of the actual story. I felt that your memoir had a good mix that left the reader understand exactly what you went through physically and mentally.

I loved the themed of your story. Your story was extremely visual and I could see the young woman going through this house trying to find those wonderful treasures. You did a great job showing that your character has been struggling to survive in this untamed world. Your story was gritty and raw and love that about your story.