Marriage is an adjustment between two people getting married Communication can cause a relationship to succeed or fail. If you do not share how you feel, it can cause your partner to withdraw. Listening can save a relationship. Schonberg (2011) found that “affective affirmation –basically, behavior that makes your partner feel loved cared for or special plays a role in a happy marriage and those men need it more than women. There are several factors and problems that can cause marriage to either succeed or fail. It is important to discuss problem things left unsaid can cause your partner to with draw.
The first love language that Chapman talks about is “Words of Affirmation”. He says that one of the most common ways to communicate love is by building each other up with positive things to say. Solomon, the author of the ancient Hebrew Wisdom Literature wrote: “The tongue has the power of life and death” Chapman says that there is a “tremendous power” in verbally affirming each other as a couple and that they are best expressed when they are straightforward statements of
A marriage should not ride on doubts and fears, but on loyalty and honesty. With this in mind, it can be asserted that marriage is complex, requiring only the strongest bond between two people to happily
Affirmation is about acknowledging and encouraging each other and reassuring individuals of their worth and value. Affirmation is communicated through positive words, praise and gestures. This is important in all relationships, but particularly with children and young people who are still
On page 68 in Gary Chapman’s 5 love languages, it states “In addition to the basic love language of quality time, or giving your spouse your undivided attention , is another dialect called quality activities” (68). This particular quote resonated with me deeply because of its overall meaning. To me this sentence is saying that although it is important for one to give their spouse quality time and dedicate hours solely to them, it is also important to do meaningful activities with them. Moreover, sometimes I may have to do something that I might not necessarily enjoy doing, but more significant other enjoys deeply. This quote from this page has taught me a great deal.
Marriage requires effort and work. Many newlyweds come into a marriage thinking it is easy but do not consider the consequences of marriage that heavily rely on balances and partnership. Marriage is all about compromise. It is important to engage in a premarital program to allow both partners to learn what to expect within a marriage, how to face certain roadblocks, and to better communication when conflict is aroused so that divorce does not become an option. Gottman’s research (2009) has made a significant contribution to the study of relationship and marriage tying unity, harmony, and communication together to make relationship and marriage work. When a couple who does not have consummate love (intimacy, passion, and commitment), they often portray the six indicators of divorce: harsh startup, the Four Horsemen, flooding, body language, failed repair attempts and reflecting on bad memories (Gottman, 2009). Divorce often occurs within the first two years of marriages and almost half of divorces end within the first seven years (Bhutto-Ramirez, 2015).
The book “The 5 Love Languages, The Secret to Love That Lasts” by Gary Chapman essentially says that once the obsession of “falling in love” wears off, if you understand your partner’s “love language”, and they know yours, you can build a relationship where both of you feel you are loved. The 5 languages suggested are all actions that I believe many people already perform to show love, however he shows, through various clinical examples, that not everyone interprets the actions as acts of love. He implied that many divorces could be prevented if the couples improved their relationships by learning the love languages of their partners.
This book provides more insight on how communication is a tool you need to work on constantly to achieve happiness in your marriage. Communicating and listening to your partner will show that love, respect towards them, and help solve conflicts that will occur.
The 5 love Languages I have found that over the course of reading this book, we all need different things to feel loved. The 5 primary love languages people speak are; words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch, all of which vary from person to person. While reading this book I took it upon myself to work this book into my personal relationship to try and figure out what love language my significant other speaks, let’s just say I learned a lot! The 5 love languages, written by Gary Chapman, has taught me what a ‘love tank’ is, the importance of identifying your significant others love language, and what the true meaning of love stands for. My reaction to this book has made a dramatic and powerfully positive impact on my relationship, and I’m very happy I chose this book to read.
In “Understanding the Five Love Languages”, a book written by Dr. Gary Chapman elaborates and informs couples on the five different love languages, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Receiving Gifts, Quality Time, Physical Touch these are the love languages that each spouse has to learn how to speak their love language. In essence, this book Dr. Gary Chapman describes the five love languages. Presently, Words of Affirmation is receiving words of appreciation from his/her spouse. Next, Acts of Service is doing something for hers/his significant other, a simple act of service. Another, Receiving Gifts someone who is materialistic a simple gift that is giving to a spouse is an act of love.
The 5 Love Languages official assessment for teenagers is a 30 pair statement test. Now let’s talk about my results. According to the test, my primary love language is quality time with a score of 9. My secondary love language is acts of service with 7. Next, I got 6 on both receiving gifts and words of affirmation. My lowest score is 2 on physical touch. I agree on my top result which is quality time. As a person, I really believe that time is one the greatest gift you can give to someone. Simply because it can’t be bought and it is something that can’t be replaced. If you spend time with a person it means that he or she is part of your priorities and that he or she is important to you. I also see it as a required effort for your loved ones.
One of the main reason I feel that affirmations can cause you to be successful is mainly due to the reason that as I am utilizing this practice I can feel myself growing more confident about my dreams. I have always considered myself to be highly motivated and a person who is determined to achieve my dreams. The only problem was
Another author who specializes in concept of achieving ability to communicate better in the relationships is Susan Page. She has a master?s degree in theology and has directed women?s programs at the University of California at Berkeley. Page is an expert in conducting relationships workshops, she is mostly concern with learning communication rules. The communication rules are very helpful for the relationship to last for a long period of time. Learning those rules will help people give more to the spouse they love. People communicate every day, learning how to talk to each other could be very helpful for a healthy relationship. By implementing the right techniques to resolve conflicts and start understanding each other will help couples achieve their goals. Fallowing Page?s rules gives couples ability to resolve conflicts, arguments and understand what they might want from their life. Susan Page gets her expertises from workshops discussions, interviews with happily married couples and her own personal experiences. Page statistically found out that many couples have poor knowledge on how to communicate with
A Prominent saying state – “Good Communication is the key to a healthy relationship or marriage”; whether it may be verbal or non-verbal. Many marriages end up in divorce, because of neglecting to communicate