The Brides Come to the Yuba City

In North America, people will argue that love needs to happen before marriage but, historically, this is actually a very new notion. Mr. Smolinsky was in shock when his daughters wanted to marry for love. He asked his wife if they even looked at each other before the engagement and she replied, “’Maybe if I had the sense of my daughters in America, I would have given you a good look over before the wedding’” (76). This implies that if she had the choice, she would have married for love or perhaps a different man at least.

Arranged marriages are very popular amongst many countries and cultures. It is the tradition of someone’s spouse being chosen for them, usually by their parents. Unfortunately, a decent amount of these marriages occur with the person being forced against their will, or the bride being a child. Arranged marriage, as seen in Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet,” is an important topic in literature and modern-day culture.

In our society, we wouldn’t consider arranged marriages as a normal thing we are, use to consensual heterosexual serial monogamy. But in some countries, they do consider arranged marriages normal. In India, arranged marriages have been apart of the Indian culture since the fourth century and many consider it a central fabric of Indian society (Arranged Marriages, Matchmakers, and Dowries in India, 2000). Pakistan also considers arranged marriages as normal in Pakistani culture elders of the family are considered wise and they are the ones who help pick out a spouse a family member (Arranged Marriages are the Part of Pakistani Culture, 2012). Japan still practices arranged marriage but now less than ten percent of marriages are arranged compared to half a century ago when about seventy percent were arranged(Tying the Knot, 1998). In China, they have marriage markets where parents line the pathways share with other parents their clippings they have on their child, hoping to find a good match for their child (Epatko, 2015). Still, today many countries consider arranged marriages normal.

Mahasweta Devi’s short story, “Giribala,” is about the life of Giribala, a girl of Talsana village located in India. Born into a caste in a time when it was still customary to pay a bride-price, Giri is sold to Aulchand by her father. From this point on, we see a series of unfortunate, tragic events that take place in Giri’s life as a result of the circumstances surrounding Giri’s life. There are many issues in Giri’s life in India that Devi highlights to readers. First, the economic instability of the village leads to an extremely poor quality of life for the lower, working classes. Next, the cruel role of women determined by men in society is to either satisfy the sexual desires of men or to reproduce offspring who can work or be sold off to marriages. There are also other social norms and beliefs which discriminate against women that will be discussed.

When examining both Robert Browning’s, My Last Duchess, and Charlotte Mew’s, The Farmers Bride, the reader witnesses the poems positions of marriage in the natural world. Within both works, it is quite evident how each relationship is vastly different from the modern world, yet parallel it at the same time. Whether it be: the interactions between the two people or the conditions of the marriage, it is made more than apparent that both can be applied to modern conceptualizations of marriage.

Mahadeviyakka was the first women to leave her husband, this act was unheard of at this time and held the consequence of banishment or even death. During this time, women were treated like property instead of human beings, while men held all the power. Marriage was a deal made by two men trading value for value. Whether it be property, crops, money, etc these deals were made prior to a marriage for the sole purpose of a business agreement.

Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni highlights the differences between Indian and American culture in her collection of short stories, Arranged Marriage. Each tale utilizes a different narrator, whether it is first or third person narration, to highlight the struggles women face in all arranged marriages. Many of these women live in America, yet India’s strict moral code still burdens them. In “Doors”, Preeti struggles to balance her American beliefs with the Indian beliefs of her husband, similarly to Anju, who wonders if her life and pregnancy would be different if she lived in India throughout “The Ultrasound”. In “The Word Love”, a woman must confront her situation and push her boundaries. Divakaruni shows the highs and lows of arranged marriages, proving that I would not thrive in a commitment made without my input.

The book mentions about the mental confusions, insecurities and the effort to understand their spouses. The writer has expressed simple and usual emotions of a womanhood, fidelity and family. A tint of Indian culture is reflected in each chapter indicating how a bridegroom and groom select each other, the nature of an Indian woman and how she takes up challenges in her life, reconciling the roles of a daughter, an ex-wife, a wife and a mother, the strength of the human spirit and their passion to survive and fight for a good life. It also features the distinctive qualities of Indian relatives highlighting their interest in an individual’s marital life and how offensive it is to the society to find a married woman talking to an unknown man. The book also focuses on the pain of a mother to see her unhealthy

In the short story “Saving Sourdi” it shocked me at first to know that some marriages are still arranged here today in America. I had to read the story back because to understand the struggle Nea and her family has from moving from the homeland to America trying to attain the American Dream. Nea’s and her sister had a great relationship while they were growing up but because Sourdi is older and more mature she harsh realities of the world before Nea. Nea is to young to understand such changes in the world because from a young age she was promised happiness but lost hope as she moved from place to place. Having a sister I can relate to Nea anxiously want to drive to her sister house in the middle of the night to make sure she is alright.

In this story there is an ongoing struggle between following the rules and expectations of a strict society to marry the proper person, or get

In the book, Arranged Marriage, by Chitra Divakaruni there are multiple stories that demonstrate arranged marriages from within the Indian culture. In some cases, arranged marriages work out better than others. However, in the short stories in her book, most don’t work out positively. In the short stories, “The Bats” and “The Disappearance”, the arranged marriages don’t work out. Chitra Divakaruni’s viewpoint on arranged marriages is clearly negative, due to violence, and the effect on children.

Is marriage an oppression for women? In the patriarchal society, marriage is deemed as the ultimate destiny for women. Marriage is their priority because singlehood is not praised. In fact, if a woman is not married by a certain age, her family makes it their responsibility to find her a husband. Her aspirations and pursuit of a career represent obstacles if they hinder her from marriage. Unfortunately, women are influenced that their lives are not complete without marriage. Therefore, Mrs. Mallard did not love her husband, but was only adhering to society’s norm.

This joint family, like any social organization, must face problems such as acceptable division of work, relationships and specific family roles. These familial relationships are managed on the basis of a secular hierarchical principle. In fact, all Indians owe respect and obedience to the head of the family, who usually is the father or the oldest man of the family community. In The Gift of a Bride: A Tale of Anthropology, Matrimony and Murder by Nanda and Gregg, it is explained that, “females [are] placed under the perpetual guardianship of first their fathers and elder brothers, then their husbands.” (Nanda & Gregg 22) Thus, all the spending decisions, studies and profession, or marriage, are exclusively the responsibility of the father after the possible discussions with the other men of the family. Age and sex are the basic principles of this hierarchical system. The eldest sons enjoy greater unchallenged authority than their cadets. Of course men have more authority than women, but older married women have an important role within the family. In fact, the authority of a woman depends on the rank of her husband inside the group. Traditionally, the wife of the patriarch rules over domestic affairs and has considerable power over the other women in the community, especially her daughters- in-law.

There is no hint of displeasure on her face as she diligently carries out her duty as an ‘ideal wife’. Also why should she have any objection for ‘as long as she lives, a woman’s God and master is her husband’. This scene emphasises the nature of a traditional marital relationship in Indian culture and the presumed duties of a woman as a wife. The text of the Ramayana is considered to be sacred and is followed religiously by people. If it happens to call a woman’s husband her master and God, its influence on the psyche of the people, especially the women, is self

Arranged marriages are set up by friends and family, and sometimes by a matchmaker that sets up the marriage. But the bride’s father has the most responsibility in arranging marriage for his daughter, and is the one who approaches the father of a potential bridegroom. Important aspects when considering a possible match are financial status, caste, and the bride and bridegrooms horoscopes matching. The role of astrology is important, and if a Hindu priest finds that the horoscopes of the potential spouses do not match, they will not marry, and must begin the search all over again (Livermore, 2009). India’s view of marriage first and then love is very different from the Western view where love comes before marriage, seems to be successful. The