The Bully, the Bullied, and the Bystanders by Barbara Coloroso

In this book the author talks about The differences between a bully, The ones getting bullied, and The bystander. Also the innocent ones feeling guilty and responsible for those being bullied. The part which caught my intention was when the author described why kids don't tell adults about their problems with bullies. I found all her reasons true especially the

Not all that long ago, it was dismissed as an unfortunate rite of childhood.” He then uses logos to further push his ideas. He begins to explain that bullying is not as big an epidemic as expressed. He continues on saying that educators are “divided on how effective they are on actually helping kids.” Cloud then provides statistics that contradict bullying as a growing problem. His essay then talks about how Thirty-seven percent of students do not feel safe at school and how this statistic “remained stable” for decades. His use of statistics helps him use logos, showing the reader his logical reasoning behind what he is saying. He then explains that many students are both bullies and “victimizers” saying that “the Josephson institute’s Center for Youth Ethics Found that 47% had ‘been bullied, teased or taunted’ at school but that 50% had been bullies themselves.” Cloud’s use of logos helps the reader understand and believe his

Some people don 't believe that bullying is such a big issue in the world, they think it 's just ‘boys acting like boys’ or ‘girls being girls’. However, when a bully is around they are the ones that draw the line and decide what is fun and what is a gesture that is “intentionally hostile.” A bully is a bully because they get what they want which gives them power; power which enables them to only see the good it brings them and not others.

Bullying is bound to happen anywhere at any time but occurs mostly within school limits. Kathleen Winkler defines bulling in her book, Bullying, as “...any kind of ongoing physical or verbal mistreatment, done with the intent to harm, where there is an imbalance of power between bully and victim” (Winkler 14). Bullying has an extremely important impact on one’s everyday life and can affect their life negatively getting to the point where they can no longer take the blow. To try and prevent bullying from taking place in schools, one needs to know how bullying effects a person, what the role of each person involved in the situation is, and have knowledge of specific methods on how to prevent it. Bullying in schools is a serious problem and a handful of school do their part to prevent it; others, not as much, which means there is room for improvements.

The bully is normally very well known; someone who is just as, if not more, guilty is nearly undetectable. This person is a bystander, and according to Tales of Bullying, being a bystander is just as bad as bullying. Bystanders just join in on the laughing. They don’t even help; they just watch bullying like it’s some sort of comedy show. Bystanders can also be people who are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. They can just as easily turn into a person who stands up to bullies, but they don’t. In the end bystanders are just as, if not more, guilty than the

When a person is initiating bullying, it often refers to verbal or physical harassment such as fighting, calling names and even black mailing. In fact, researchers and bloggers have mentioned labeling kids, as ”victims and Bullies” does not help discard the situation. It is known to cause children to identify themselves as “victims” and “bullies” and patterns may be repeated. Nonetheless, although social roles such as “Victims and Bullies” can be negative as far as labeling, it has helps understand the source of warning signs and aggressive behavior so it can be managed properly. For example, Warning signs such as constantly speaking negative, getting into a lot of fights, being aggressive and even coming home with scars and bruises. Average shows that potential bullying may occurs during the 4th-12th grade. During these situations some schools have requested organizations and awareness taught during classes to help educate kids on he effects and possible consequences of bullying.

The book states "Bullying is done on purpose, with the intent to hurt or embarrass you." This shows that there is no mistake about the act , they're trying to hurt someone. In addition, "...sometimes a bully will corner you in an empty hallway and actually carry them out. But bullying is usually done for others to see. Bullies don't just want to prove their power over you. They also want to make sure that other people know that they have some sort of control over how you feel and act..." So bully make sure someone knows to show that they are powerful and shouldn't be messed

Experts say that the old methods that were once used to help bring down the rate of bullying are now no longer effective because they are out-of-date. Ortiz states, “In the past, administrators often relied on individual conversations, sporadic motivational speakers and other piecemeal attempts focused on telling students not to be mean”. It is quite obvious as to why these methods are now considered to be very elementary and inefficient. As our society advances, our methods of coping with complexities need to advance as well. Luckily, school districts will implement ideas of having more in-depth approaches that stress on the importance of respect and peer-to-peer remediation. Schools all across the United States are taking a stand against bullying by focusing on crucial campaigns that strive on more inclusive approaches such as the “No One Eats Alone” campaign and the “Stop, Walk and Talk

She describes that confronting the bully, by fightback, sharing with friend and family for intervention, are different strategies used by victims. In some case the victim is unable to equalize this power over the bully. Which can prolong, ongoing humiliation dealing with issues, such as divorce in the family, drastic learning disabilities, as well as chronic illness potently can cause a breaking point. Having low self-esteem, depression, and suicidal and homicidal ideations. Some victims carry the hurt of bullying into adulthood. More or less victims tend to lose faith in other people for comfort and support. She contends “the adverse social and emotional consequences of bullying victimization do not support the idea that bullying builds character. Victimization may build character for a tiny proportion of the population.” (Kuykendall 2012). Bullying for the most part can be traumatic and painful should not be silently approved. Bullies hold social power than the victims. However attacks arise from frustration. Provocative victims are typically sincerely sorry and very apologetic after an attack, a reflection of genuine or low self-esteem. True bullies consume high self-esteem.

The role of bullying encompasses of what actually takes place in school environments and what goes on in communities, families and agencies where children are violent. The authors looks at “A Staging Paradigm” in which the authors divided the violence in patterns and five patterns: repetitive school disruptions (pattern 1), acute case of child aggressor or victim (pattern 2), highly submissive victim or aggressive young student (pattern 3), child with self-injurious or self-defeating behavior (pattern 4), and truants and dropouts (pattern 5). It was noted that bullies are allow to do what they want because bystanders would not intervene and this creates a humiliating experience for the community and the family not to have a peaceful environment ( Weisbroth 2012).

Bullying is a problem that is on the rise in society; however, many individuals have a distorted view of what bullying entails. Usually when someone thinks of bullying, they assume that it is a standard part of a child’s life. This view, on the contrary, is erroneous. Bullying is actually abnormal behavior, many times, leaving victims with a dismantled self identity. Since some people do not understand the consequences of bullying, the actions of the bully often go unnoticed and are perceived as “kids being kids”. The issue of bullying goes deeper than that nevertheless. Despite the erroneous views that many individuals hold towards bullying, it is still a distortion of normal behavior in children.

To bully is to use strength and power to intimidate or harm the ones who are weaker. In the documentary “Bully”, directed by Lee Hirsch, the theme of the film is how many teachers and parents actually do not know what is happening in the lives of the children that they care for. However, there are also so many children who are hesitant to tell anyone that they are being bullied. The film follows the lives of several children who are faced with bullying every day. This film also follows parents whose children have committed suicide. Their lives had become intolerable and no one noticed or someone noticed and they did nothing too late. There are teachers and administrators who are clueless as to what is happening and some just flat out do not want to

Children who are bullied are at risk for anxiety, loneliness, low self-esteem, depression, alcohol and drug use, running away, social withdrawal, and poor academic performance. The child that is a bully is. likely to get into fights or get injured from a fight, vandalize or steal property, drink, smoke, drop out of school and become a criminal. Whether a victim or the bully, both have unfavorable outcomes. To change the bullying culture there are some important things that need to happen. Children need a positive way to feel, this does not mean that all players win rather it means that strengths need to be recognized and encouraged. We need to teach children how to use their leadership skills to build others instead of tearing them down. Teaching our children to have empathy early can develop life skills of understanding and compassion, ultimately changing the way our children look at each other as well as how they respond to each other will change the culture. Writing in Fifty-Two Sundays, Michael Brown suggests “We, as a country, need to take the time to understand what is really happening in the bullying debate so that we can take action that will actually help the

Sarah is a kind girl, she gets good grades and is what society would think as quite pretty. However, on a daily basis, she is harassed from the time that she wakes up, until the time that she goes to sleep in tears. She has attempted to talk to other adults such as the teachers at the school. Sadly, the bully only got off a warning and Sarah was still tormented day in and day out. This short example shows that schools need to shine more light on the subject of bullying. Schools have “attempted” to take on this idea of bullying by plastering posters one walls along with counselors that try their hardest to help. Nevertheless, this cannot be enough to stop bullying at schools, can it? With the

This book prompt discussion on bullying and what you can do if you see it, experience it, or why people do it.