The Definition Of Self Identity

1591 Words7 Pages
Self-identity is what defines a person. Be it physically, emotionally, or psychologically, it is what one decides to put out and show to the world. Psychotherapist Leslie Bell connects self-identity with the concept of splitting. Splitting is, “...a tendency to think in either/or patterns and to insist that one cannot feel two seemingly contradictory desires at once” (Bell 28). She weaves this phenomenon into the stories of three distinct women. In addition, Bell argues that splitting eliminates a woman’s possibilities of living a truly free and liberated life. She insinuates that splitting is a contributing factor when it comes to one 's self-identity; however, it has no role in determining this aspect of a person. What truly contributes to a person 's self-identity is their past and outside influences, not the phenomenon known as splitting. The first woman Bell mentioned in her study, Claudia, frequently hooked up with men but felt regret and worry about what people around her thought about her actions. Claudia is a successful postdoctoral researcher, and has no significant reason to feel hesitant when it comes to the topic of sexuality. It is more a matter of what others think about her, and her religious Catholic family. Not only that, Claudia 's mother 's loss of her true self due to being with her father left a lasting impression on Claudia 's view of what a relationship is. Imagine seeing the figurative death of a person before one 's eyes, of course it leaves a
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