The Fear Of Love : Parenting Difficult Adopted Children, B. Bryan Post

My mother was all I had in this world. It has been two weeks and I

Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) was first introduced just over 20 years ago, with the publication of DSM-III (American Psychiatric Association, 1980). In the DSM-IV. The disorder is defined by aberrant social behavior that appears in early childhood and is evident cross contextually(1994). The disorder describes aberrant social behaviors in young children that are believed to derive from being reared in caregiving environments lacking species-typical nurturance and stimulation, such as in instances such as maltreatment or institutional rearing. (First, M., & Tasman, A. 2010) . In cases of RAD two major types of abnormalities have been cited; these include an emotionally withdrawn/inhibited type and an indiscriminately social/disinhibited pattern (First, M., & Tasman, A. 2010).Conditions in in foreign orphanages and institutions such as, multiple caregivers, maltreatment, abuse, neglect, and others contribute to the inability for internationally adopted children to form secure attachments. All of these factors contribute to internationally adopted children being at a higher risk to develop attachment disorders such as RAD and other behavioral problems.

There are three main types of stress that exists in childhood. These are positive stress, tolerable stress, and toxic stress. Positive stress often caused by brief events experienced by the child, such as disappointment or frustration, and is crucial to developing a healthy response to stressful environments. Tolerable stress is caused by an event which has a profound impact on the child’s life, such as losing a parent or a serious medical condition. Tolerable stress

Attachment in Adopted Children; Research shows most all adopted children particularly over the age of 5 years old will likely develop some form of an attachment issue. Attachment is an emotional bond that will typically develop between infants / young children and their caregivers. When a child feels a attachment security it will help stimulate trust, social emotional and conative development in a child’s brain, this will help to shape future responses and reactions thru out a child’s developmental stages of growth. A child with some form of attachment disorder problem will have difficulty connecting to others and managing their own emotions. This will result in a lack of trust and self worth, a fear of getting close to anyone, anger, and a need to be in control.

The study of the developmental implications of early trauma for children is essential for understanding appropriate expectations and interventions for children to help foster and adoptive families and child welfare workers maintain appropriate expectations for children who have been adopted and better equip them to meet their children’s unique needs. Considering that children who have experienced traumatic removal from a primary caregiver are likely to exhibit behaviors that lead to placement breakdowns and therefore more traumatic removals from caregivers, it is essential for positive long term outcomes that the initial placement and child’s existing connections be preserved (Newton, R. R., Litrownik, A. J., & Landsverk, J. A., 2000). Additionally, foster parents who hold appropriate expectations and understand causes and reasons for a child’s behavior is predictive of placement stability (Butler & Charles, 1999).

There were no reported changes in this area. Mr. and Mrs. Gailliard (MHS) describe Clarence as quiet. Clarence continues to get more sociable. Clarence had some interactions, however separates himself from peers.

Such toxic stress can have damaging effects on learning, behavior, and health across the lifespan. Learning how to cope with adversity is an important part of healthy child development. The most effective prevention is to reduce exposure of young children to extremely stressful conditions. Research also indicates that supportive, responsive relationships with caring adults as early in life as possible can prevent or reverse the damaging effects of toxic stress response (Center on Developing Child, nd). By establishing clear lines of communication between adults and children, and home and school, parents and teachers can help to shape children’s perceptions in informed ways. During times of trouble, when emotions run high, parents and teachers can help children develop the skills necessary to manage their feelings, to confront unpleasant or adverse realities, and to acquire greater emotional stability. In order to support children in better understanding their world, adults may have to help them come to terms with circumstances that are frightening, confusing, overwhelming, or possibly unrelated to their past experience. By providing a safe and supportive environment and a healthy acceptance of all that is good in life, a calm and ready-to-listen adult can facilitate children’s well being, and help to alleviate the fear, dismay or confusion they may feel. In doing so, it is important to honor and nurture children’s sensitivity. Although parents and teachers cannot shelter children from all adversity, they are well positioned to help children learn about the imbalances in the world, to better comprehend their impact, and to find thoughtful ways to strike a comfortable and meaningful balance of their own (Foster & Matthews,

Three books and authors dealing with the subject of adoption are Beating the Adoption Odds by Cynthia D. Martin, Adopting in America by Randall Hicks, and Twenty things adopted kids wish their adoptive parents knew.

In The Road to Evergreen by Rachael Stryker is an interesting eye catching ethnography that emphasizes on the psychiatric disorder on adopted children called RAD, also known as reactive attachment disorder. Reactive attachment disorder “Describes children who are considered to be unable or unwilling to bond with parental (most often mother) figures” (Stryker 3). The reason why these particular children are unable to form a bond with their primary family is because in their past relationships formed with their birth parents, if any, have been either neglected or abused in both a physical and or mental way. So, in the end, the child is left with RAD and their new adopted families are the ones who have to get help for them in hope for a noticeable

The article “To Love, and Maybe Lose, a Foster Child” by Maghan Moravcik Walbert relates to marriage and family because it is about a child in a foster care system and a family trying to get the child by going through court systems. Their biological son is very attached to the foster child and sees him as his own sibling. The family buys the foster child everything he needs for like his birthday, Christmas, and first day of school clothing.

In the last four decades, the concept of the American family has undergone a radical transformation, reflecting society¡¯s growing openness. Among all segments of society, there is a greater acceptance of a variety of family structures ¨C from single parenting to blended families to same sex parenting of children. The introduction of openness into the process of adoption offers new opportunities for children in need of a parent or parents and prospective parents wishing to create or expand their families. Meeting the requirements to become eligible to adopt no longer means being constrained by the conventions of an earlier generation.

The neuroscience behind the effects of children in a constant state of stress clearly outlines the importance of intervention. Stress, especially toxic stress as outlined by the third article, negatively impacts all areas development, including mental, emotional, and even physical health. The developmental effects last far past children. Even infants are not immune from stress and tension; exposure to violence can and does impact children into adulthood. To help children in conflict, it is important to recognize that these children have existed in a constant state of stress and, once they are removed from the environment, their body remains in that flight or fight state. It does not go away just because they are no longer in danger. Children

Children enter the world as part of preexisting systems. They enter parental systems and families that already have rules, roles and boundaries, and more are made as children grow and the family develops. These transitions can be confusing and challenging for all members involved leading to feelings of fear, anger and even helplessness. Members within the family

According to the article, “Stress and Child Development” (2014) by Ross Thompson, stress is defined as “a complex psychobiological process with biological, emotional, mental, and behavioral consequences, all of which influence one another” (Thompson, 2014, p.46). Thompson’s research provided insight into helping children who suffer from stress, and cope with this stress through neurobiological processes, including two-generation and multi-generation intervention, which includes parents, teachers, relatives and grandparents or anyone who provides care for these children. Thompson’s research found that children who grow up in a loving environment are less stressful, and when confronted with stress, these children cope with stress better than children who live in a non-loving environment. Thompson suggested that stress is brought on when an individual feels threatened or when her or she feels surrounded by, or in immediate danger, thus, emphasizing how a child’s social experiences plays a key role in the development of a child’s neurological systems as well as his or her biological system (Thompson, 2014). Thompson’s research of Hurricane Katrina found that children whose parents could no longer provide care for their children faired much worse than children whose parents provided care, as it relates to stress. Thompson’s study of a Romanian orphanage found that the sooner a child was adopted into a loving environment, the sooner a child learned how to cope and

Facilitating Developmental Attachment: The Road to Emotional Recovery and Behavioral Change in Foster and Adopted Children by Daniel A Hughes