The Home For Perfect By Erica Naone

“Being a victim is supposed to set you free; it acquits you of any agency, any sense of responsibility to the person who did you harm. It’s not your fault, they say. Leave him, they say. Nobody ever tells you what to do if leaving isn’t an option.” Imagine how a woman, especially in the 1920’s, felt to be in this position.

Women abuse is a problem that plagues society in numerous ways. It is a problem that lacks proper definition in today’s society, and as a result has many misconceptions regarding the subject. It has been a problem that has been going on for centuries and has only recently been discussed as inappropriate and a disgusting act against women. The stereotypical family of a mother, father and children, loving, caring and happy with each other is always depicted on television. Real life relationships and families range from happy and loving to extreme dysfunctional in today’s society. Not every relationship and family experiences the “haven in the heartless world” (Momirov, 2011), many experience more heartless world within the family. This paper will focus on women abuse within the family. The purpose of this paper is to explore women that are victims of domestic abuse and the social structures that create the social problem women will face for the rest of their lives. This paper argues that neoliberal state policies create the social conditions that force abused women to stay in abusive relationships. This paper covers women abuse through three main parts. Part one of this essay will

Many women and men seek intimate relationships in order to fill their emotional needs of security, safety and love. Their journey starts off with their loved ones spoiling them with flattering gifts and emotional words. The love they feel is so wonderful and deep that they believe that nothing can come between them. They are so happy and convinced that they will live happily ever after with the one they love. Unfortunately, the fairytale they have dreamt about was only temporary and soon comes to an end. The love story they have ones longed for turns into a horrible nightmare. The emotional words they were once spoiled with turn into howling screams and name-calling. The flattering gifts turn into physical abuse. This relationship is referred to as domestic violence or intimate partner violence. This happens when a partner or significant other declares power, authority and control over the other partner. To maintain this authority and control, the abusive partner uses emotional, physical or sexual abuse over his victim (Alters 27). Victims will desperately look for an exit out of this relationship, but only to be blocked by numerous walls of the despair, fear and misery. Many people are convinced that victims have the option of leaving, but they are too weak and they choose not to. What many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers. In most cases the outcomes of leaving are

Life is a gift in which many have the great experiences that come with it. As children, most have loving parents, helpful teachers, a good education, and friends that encourage us to fulfill our dreams. We become teenagers who think we know it all, strictly care about having a good time, and make memories that we can carry with us throughout our lifetime. Eventually we must grow up. We get a job, marry someone, and start a family. If you haven’t noticed already, I am describing an ideal life that many don’t have the privilege of living. Adult years begin to tear you apart and build up stress. Learning to live a life on your own can and will lead to tears and mistakes. Although everyone makes mistakes some can be more

Nowadays, a large number of people migrate to the United States to work and achieve the American Dream. According to the Article “What is the American Dream?” by Kimberly Amadeo, “The American Dream was first publicly defined in 1931 by James Truslow Adams in Epic of America. Adam’s often-repeated quote is, ‘The American Dream is that dream of land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for everyone, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement.’” There are many people that can have different perspectives when it comes to the topic of the American dream. Even though many people assume the American Dream is dead, it is a very controversial topic. The American Dream may have many different points of views, but it really does exist, after all, it takes an ambitious person to strive for success through hard work, dedication and determination.

Another demographic group that is abused, is one that many people don’t often think about when they think of domestic violence. “A quarter and a half of all domestic violence victims are men” (Kevan-Graham). Females aren’t the only victims in the world of violence, but as feminist picked up the “anti-abuse”

Women will continue to suffer from domestic violence unless there is some sort of intervention to help them. When dealing with this population, it is essential to create a safe environment where the woman can talk freely about the abuse without any retaliation from the abuser. When someone comes into a therapeutic session, everyone deserves to be treated with respect and care. This in turn will create a sense of hope that a different type of life can be possible. Also, knowing that there is a support system can help the woman begin the process of change. Despite this, the process of leaving the abusive partner is slow (Warshaw, n.d.)

Domestic violence is a very important social problem that we must educate ourselves on because it has such a profound and negative effect on the individual(s) being abused. They are affected mentally, emotionally, physically, and I know from experience that the scars can run very deep. Being in an abusive relationship for three years was devastating to my self-image as a teenager, and because of these feelings of inadequacy, my decreasing esteem allowed me to stay in such a dangerous scenario. Healing from the negative effects of that relationship has been a difficult journey for me, and I can only imagine how much more difficult it must be for women abused for years on end. To this day, I struggle greatly with the ability to let go of my own "control"

Every minute twenty four people are victims of abuse in the United States, that’s more than 12 million women a year. People seem to wear a mask until they are behind closed doors. Abuse has affected the victim and suspect both and there are many reasons for everything.

Every choice that an abused woman considers to do with regards in seeking help or ending the relationship involves a variety of risks. Time and time again, the common question arises, “why doesn’t she just leave?” Most often abused women, at great and potentially fatal risk, do leave their abusive relationships. However, there is a multitude of barriers, including increasing abuse and the potential for re-victimization by the system that does not respond accordingly, and most often force many women to return to their abusers. A woman may become vulnerable as she goes through the stages of leaving her abuser. There are many reasons why a woman becomes vulnerable; guilt, denial, and fear may be among a few reasons, though no matter what the

The CDC reports that nearly half of all men and women in the United States have been psychologically abused by a romantic partner, while around a quarter of women and 1 in 7 men have been physically abused [2]. This is a dramatic difference from areas like the United Kingdom, where 8.2% of women and 4% of men have been abused [3] One in three people experience abuse by a romantic partner by the age of eighteen [4]. In 2015, 87% of hospitalized abuse victims in New York state were women, and were admitted more often than male victims [5]. This can likely be partially attributed to traditional gender roles, which assume that men are “stronger” than women and are “weak” if they are hurt by a woman.

I agree some women who experience abuse have become so accustom to the bad treatment that it is their norm. The abuser has the tendency to separate the abused from family member to ensure that the victim remains dependent on their abuser and without them their life would not be the same. Determining how to change the mind set of the abused would takes a lot of work, not only by the interventionist, but also family and friends. Unfortunately women that has endured abuse for so many years has a difficult time adjust to time without their abuser.

According to statistics found by the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, Every nine seconds a woman is abused by her husband or intimate partner. At least 1 in every 4 women and 1 in every 9 men have been beaten, coerced into sex or otherwise abused in their lifetime. Most often the abuser is one of their own family. Domestic violence is a problem that somehow affects every one of us in this room at some time and is actually the leading cause of injury to women -- more than car accidents, muggings and rapes combined.

Every year in the United States, One in four women are victims of the domestic violence; however, this is only based on what has been reported to the department of justice (Stahly 2008). While men are also victims of domestic violence, women are more often the victims. Moreover, 90% of domestic violence is male initiated. In severe cases domestic violence ends with victims being murdered. More specifically, domestic violence resulted in 2,340 deaths in the United States in 2007, and 70% of those killed were females (CDC 2012). Many people think that victims have the option of leaving and many people blame victims for putting up with the abuse; what many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers, these reasons include, isolation, having children bounding them with the abuser and lack of financial support. "It 's never pretty when you leave an abusive and controlling relationship. The warden always protests when a prison gets shut down," says Dr. Steve Maraboli (qtd from web). Whether a victim stays or leaves their abuser, the outcomes of both situations are not always as easy as many people predict. In some situations, the outcomes of leaving may be very dangerous for both the victim and her children.

“Every year in the United States there are over 3 million incidents of domestic violence. That means that every nine seconds a women is beaten by her domestic partner” (Findeley). There are many women that stay silent when being abuse by their partners. The consequences of staying quiet when obtaining abuse can be dangerous and can also lead to death. Many women do not recognize the importance of the fact that there is in speaking out if they are being abuse by their partner. No woman should take domestic abuse by their partners. Every woman deserves a healthy relationship; A healthy relationship involves trust, respect, and consideration for the other person. Domestic abuse has gotten worse during the past years and is still rising up. One can see that domestic abuse can occur everywhere. Domestic abuse is considered a crime and woman should not keep silent when being abuse.