The Importance Of My Life

How does it feel to be adopted? Has life been altered as a result of being adopted? These questions have never fazed my view of being adopted. Awareness of being adopted began as far back as I can recall and has never been a taboo family topic. Adoption didn’t affect my life in any sort of way as a child. As I matured, the realization of the impact being adopted has had on my life has evolved. This insight created a new level of gratitude for my family and my life.

One bright and sunny summer day I thought to myself today is the day. I was finally going to be adopted. At the age of fourteen, I had been looking forward to this day for many years. I often thought to myself "No one is going to want me" "I'm too old to be adopted now", but one lucky couple wanted a teenager.

As individuals grow older, face encounters, and endure numerous experiences, they have a tendency to eventually discover an inclusive sense of security in their daily life. When people keep a blind eye open to anything outside of their comfort zone, often times they see no reason to think about how different their lives could have been if particular events had not occurred. These were some of the same thoughts that drifted into my mind as I prepared for this assignment. Through it all, I became further captivated with the notion of how different my life would have ended up, had I remained an only child in my family. For this study I will define an only child as an individual who does not have any siblings.

Not until I was sent overseas and saw how the rest of the world lives did I fully understand and grasp how lucky I have been. This was the first time that I remembered actually thinking about how hard it would be if I grew up somewhere else in the world. I started to put myself in other people’s shoes and think how much my life would be different if I was African American, or if I grew up Muslim instead of Christian.

So far in my fourteen and a half years alive my life has been a complete roller coaster of many different situations and experiences that are good and bad, up and down. I always say to myself like why did I do that, what if I could of done something or even how come I am the way I am. I thought about it, if I had to live my life over again I would.

My life began when I was born unto two people who loved me but could not keep me. About three months after my birth, I was found by a policeman in the middle of a large park in Nanchang, Jiangxi and brought to a local orphanage that is still supporting orphans to this day. As sad as the beginning of my life sounds, I was one of the lucky ones. Many unwanted children are discarded in ways that ensure their deaths, bumped around to different temporary homes, or brought up through orphanages until adulthood when they are sent to live on the streets. I was placed in two different foster home, both sets of foster parents loved me and looked out for my health. 16 months later I was adopted by wonderful American family and brought to live in Eugene,

Without the circumstances that life has given to me, I maybe would have not done the things I’ve accomplished. I could have never been introduced to the clarinet or a volleyball. I could have never learned to enjoy school to the fullest. The friendships that I’ve created would have been affected, good or bad. The meaning of many things would have changed. I would never appreciate the little in life. I would have never choose the colors I’ve decided to choose today. I could have never believed in God. But most importantly, I would have never become the person I am today if life were to be

I don't have a wall with marks demonstrating my growth throughout the years, my room isn't painted some stereotypical shade of blue I picked when I was five, and I haven't known my closest friend my whole life. Occasionally, I see people with certain things and think, "Wow. You are so fortunate. I wish I could have that." However, then I bounce back to reality, and even though I may have spent my entire adolescence moving around, making friends, just to lose them a year later, I have gone to places that many people long for. On the off chance that I never lived in California, would I have been able to visit Disneyland or the beach practically anytime I wanted? Probably not. On the off chance that I hadn't lived in Virginia, would I have had the ability to nourish my interest for history by going to the various historical museums in D.C. frequently throughout the summer? Probably not. Would I have possessed the opportunity to visit the Alamo if I didn't move to Texas? No chance! I have encountered numerous things that the average seventeen year old can't say they have

At a glance my life, specifically my early childhood, looks and will continue to look pretty easy. An upper-middle class, suburban, white kid, with two loving and supportive parents, grandparents to match - it all seems just peachy. On the outside it looks like everything has come easy to me, school, sports, friends, etc. No bumps in the road, all smooth sailing. However, from my point of view - on the inside - quite the contrary is true. I am where I am today because of one, very specific, reason.

When I was a young child, I would always think about why I was adopted. I thought about the way my life was before I was adopted and why I put in the rough situation. Never did I think that someone could actually go through the things that my siblings and I endured. I often considered what my life would be like if I was never adopted or where and what I would be doing right now. I still remember that day in the courthouse when I was officially adopted into a new family.

I was young when my parents were proved unfit to raise my siblings and me. As a result, I was placed in the Foster Care System. I was passed from family to family, making me feel insecure in who I was. I would constantly try to gain approval from others, always hoping I would be worthy of someone’s attention. Eventually, my aunt and uncle decided to adopt me.

Lastly, I regret being born and it’s not what one may think. Sometimes, I am suicidal and depressed but it’s a bigger picture here. Does one ever think something would have been better if one would have never gone? I tend to think if my mother never had me, she wouldn’t be struggling and stuck like she is now. When my mother had me, she was naïve. Really, she was just a kid too, barely turning seventeen. She never got to live life like everyone else and had to grow up fast. That woman was basically on her own. Of course, she had the help of my grandma and uncle but she was in a way shoved out that door and it never opened back up. If I was never born my mother would have a lot more opportunites. She would have been able to focus herself and been a lot more successful. Instead of trying to make a way for five kids and an overgrown man-child, she would have the appreciation and love for herself as mother, child, and wife. Maybe she wouldn’t have had the disappointment she has in me and I wouldn’t carry the burden I have on my back.

One day I would go to prep school again, and then kindergarten and then perhaps I will become an infant one more time. I am writing this to record all of my memories while I am still living.

It was May 30th 1997 in the third world city of Medellin, Colombia, a single mother was finally finishing her long day at work in a local bar while being nearly nine months pregnant with a baby girl. When she was finally finished she realized her water broke. Of course she Panicked with no one around to help, and absolutely no money to afford a hospital the young woman rode her bike to the nearest mid-wife facility. There she gave birth, without any pain killers, in an uncomfortable dirty bed to that baby girl. This girl today has had the opportunity to live around the world and experience many different cultures and meet all kinds of people. She lives in a nice community and goes to a private college where she is working on her undergraduate degree. Without the challenges, the experiences, nor the sacrifices of my family I would have never become the person I am today. I would not have been as independent and ambitious, as understanding and compassionate, and I would have never chosen Social work as my professional practice.

For years, I convinced myself that the story of my life began when I arrived in America at eleven months old. I tumbled through the clichéd white-picket-fence childhood, never realizing how impossible it was to completely discard the first year of my infancy. While I had always known about being adopted from China, I did not fully comprehend the weight of this detail until my late teenage years.