The Oppression Of Motherhood

How does a person come to decide if they want to be a parent or not? The formation of procreative identities in men and women is a complex topic with many influencing factors. Tamara G. Coon Sells set out to distinguish what some of these factors were in her study of 14 unmarried, childfree graduate students (2013, p. 133). Analyzing the narrative submissions of her sample, she was able to pinpoint 5 different themes impacting the development of both men’s and women’s procreative identity: biological, deterrents, fear, hesitation, and pressure (p. 144).

The discussion that has debates like no other is that of feminism, either you are for it or against it, but could there be more to the black and white that has been created? We live in a country that is said to have equal opportunities for all, often using this as an insignia to push our standards upon others. In order to understand and approach the topic of feminism, I have to understand what is feminism exactly and how is it perceived; just because we think we know what something is, does not mean that is how it is perceived socially.

For centuries women had had to bow to men they were taught never to speak unless called upon or spoken to. That their sole purpose in life was to be a homemaker; a servant to the men in their lives fathers, brothers, sons. As time progressed women began to fight for their right to receive equal rights, education and vote. But that wasn’t enough in the year 2013 women still made eighty cents to every man’s dollar but that all changed one day. Women who were sick of being oppressed had risen up against the male chauvinism within society of the united states.The first measure was to take all men out of all positions of decision-making power immediately, and of any kind of social, professional position whatsoever. The men of society were

“With what price we pay for the glory of motherhood” (Isadora Duncan). In Defense of Single Motherhood, by Katie Roiphe, is an essay arguing why being a single mother is better than the traditional two parent method. Although Rophie has a moderate expression of ethos, her poor use of logos, and her struggle with pathos concludes this is a weak argument.

The right to have children is understood in very different ways and people’s ethics and values are put to the test each and everyday when they find out they not only must take care of themselves but the lives of another human being. The Universal Declaration of Human Rights adopted this statement regarding the right to bear children “men and women of full age, without any limitations to race, nationality or religion, have the right to marry and found a family”[1]. This concept has been viewed in multiple ways and according to ethical theorists; they agree that no rights are absolute. However, it is said that for women at least, there is a fundamental privilege to have children. The right to

The modern world is in the midst of reconstructing gender roles; debates about contraception, reproductive freedom, and female inequality are contentious and common. The majority now challenges the long established assertion that women’s bodies are the eminent domain of patriarchal control. In the past, a woman’s inability to control her reproductive choices could come with ruinous consequences. Proponents of patriarchal control argue against reproductive independence with rhetoric from religious texts and with anecdotes of ‘better days,’ when women were subservient. Often, literature about childbearing fails to acknowledge the possibility of women being uninterested in fulfilling the role of motherhood.

As women continue to struggle for equality in today's society, there is an ever growing notion born out of patriarchal ideology, that a mother has the sole responsibility of caring for and nurturing her children. In the somewhat jocular but pragmatic story “Bad Mother” by Ayelet Waldman (2010) she points to the imbalance between societal expectations of mothers and fathers when she comments:

Patriarchy is a term that can be described as male dominance, making women inferior to men. Men and women always played in different roles in society, which causes controversy if we still live in a patriarchal system today. Men were always seen to be the alpha males and breadwinners of the family to ensure there was a steady income while women were known to be housewives taking care of the family. Being a woman in America has brought so much awareness to oppression and how women have been oppressed by men for years. Black women have been oppressed by white supremacy and they are constantly being stereotyped. “Women are animals, less than human, unable to think like men, born merely to breed and serve men.” Oppression can cause radical conflicts

A significant point in Bems’ (1993) chapter in Lens of Gender on gender identity was the concept of the self-fulfilling prophecy when it comes to the treatment and development of young boys and girls in society. The first point discussed is how the ‘maternal instinct’ is not so biological as much it is women being confined to the private sphere, in turn having the most interaction with children. This point stood out as I was reading because I have known from a young age I did not want children. Many told me that my opinion would change when I grew older, and when you have your own child being a mother comes naturally. As I reflected I was reminded of the point later made by Bem (1993) that “adults in the child’s community

Turkey, a country with quite different from South Korea and Sweden maternity policies.In Turkey women are the sole providers of childcare and it is expected culturally that males have limited involvement. With this specific research Soyseçkin and Fe(2016) focused on nineteen working middle class mothers in the capital city of Turkey, Ankara. Soyseçkin and Fe did fieldwork in this Turkish community, performing in-depth interviews. Theirs results concluded that the option on whether or not the women would decided to have a child centered around her career and life choices. Following the women’s marriage if she was to consider

The oppression of women has been brought into light in the recent years but it was the norm in many societies in early history especially in premodern east Asia. During that time, the roles of men and women in society were determined by great scholars that had the power to get their voice to be heard and set general rules in society. In China, scholars like Confucius, Mencius, and Mozi had great impact on the way people divided the roles between men and women. The overall oppression of women in premodern east Asia can be seen through quotes from great scholars about how women should be obedient to men, should not make important decisions in their families, and are not spoken of equally to men in society.

Women like me are viewed “as social deviants who are stigmatized and stereotyped” (Veevers 1980, p. x). The discourse also produces the idea that a desire to not become parents is a sign of “social immaturity and emotional maladjustment” (Veevers 1980, p. 4). These classify as mental abnormality which explains the reaction seen from mine and my partner’s parents. Through this surveillance of our behaviour they identified that we were resisting what is normal. Their responses were an attempt to persuade us to avoid becoming abnormal and potentially having to face wider social rejection. My parents do not have power over me, however their response and repetition of the current discourse, that encourages having children, means that disciplinary power is exercised. This disciplinary power operates to ensure that people self-regulate their behaviour to remain

The definition of gender roles is a set of societal norms dictating what types of behavior is generally considered acceptable based on the gender of a person. Additionally, if you don’t seem to accept this standard, there can be huge consequences. For example, in India, women are viewed as a burden and a “extra mouth to feed.” Her status promotes the idea that men can treat them in a subdued manner. If they don’t comply to these requirements, then a woman is murdered by her husband or his family by being set alight by a flammable liquid, which is usually known as bride burning. Herland, by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, also uncovers the harsh inequality of women. Gender roles shouldn’t be real and they were forced on us by society.

Feminist perspective developed with the ideology that women face large amounts of inequalities in a patriarchal society. They aimed to address and rid the social world of this oppression of women by men. According to Bishop, (2015) “oppression occurs when one group of people use different forms of power to keep another group down in order to exploit them. The oppressor uses the power; the oppressed are exploited” (p. 133-134). Oppression must be by individual experience and not grouped into being the same for all. This includes understanding the original ideology of feminist theory being critiqued as only considering the experiences of middle class, white women. That black women, of lower class experienced oppression much different from the other women. Women are oppressed, thus has to be understood in a different construct that women are similar in some sources, experience of oppression but also experience oppression very differently from one individual to another. Feminist theories have further been expanded do its continuation throughout society and decades to encompass many more issues and arenas than just men and women relationships. Now it seeks to understand and address oppression based on culture, race, class, etc and not only for women but for all. Therefore, Bishop (2014) outlines five components that seem common to all forms of oppression and serve to maintain its presence in society.

They argue that this media driven debate pins working mothers against stay-at-home mothers in order to “divert the dialogue away from the real issues such as affordable health care, quality childcare, gender and racial equality, fathers’ roles in parenting, media effects, fair wages and benefits, and family-friendly work arrangements” (204). They state that in this culture of mother-blame, mothers have been blamed for causing problems in regards to childhood development such as, “epilepsy, colitis, asthma, ulcers, arthritis, anorexia nervosa, and a multitude of more severe problems in children” (207). However, they argue that it is now “accepted that these disorders are in fact not caused by poor mothering…” (208). Another issue with the Mommy Wars debate is that it portrays a universal kind of woman – white, affluent, and heterosexual – ignoring the fact that there are many different kinds of mothers of all backgrounds, sexualities, and economic statuses – which can make those who are not reflected as the “average” mother, feel inadequate. The authors further argue that these messages that working mothers are harming their children are what discourage women from economic participation and achievement and can have a negative impact on a mother’s perception of herself - which in turn can affect her performance as a parent. It seems that the