The Relationship of Mothers and their Expectations of Daughters in Amy Tan’s "Two Kinds"

About a year later, Mr. Chong and Jing-mei's mother wanted her to play in a talent show that was going to be held at the church. Jing-mei was going to play a piece called "Pleading Child." Her parents invited just about everyone they knew to come and watch their daughter in her moment of glory. When Jing-mei's time came to play her piece, she was so proud of the way she looked that she wasn't even worried about how she was going to sound. She walked up to the bench, sat down, and just started playing away. Then it hit her. She didn't know the piece, and just about every note she hit was wrong.

In addition to setting, the author uses symbols to strengthen the theme of the story. In the story, the mother buys Jing-mei a piano on which to practice. The mother and Jing-mei have different perspectives on what this symbol means. To Jing-mei, the piano symbolizes her mother trying to change her into something other than herself; however, the piano symbolizes the American dream to her mother. Eventually as Jing-mei ages, she could see her mother’s idea on what the piano means and learns to appreciate the piano. When Jing-mei is a woman, “[she] realized that [“Pleading Child” and “Perfectly Contended”] were two halves of the same song” (Tan 9). As Critic Cynthia Becerra states, “the self-realization completes this rich vignette, it is not without pain and loss.(Becerra)” This realization shows how she learns that her mother only has high aspirations for her. The symbolical piano helps the theme by showing the contrasting views between the mother and the daughter in their relationship.

She was my mother,” (31).  Jing-Mei says this to her aunts after her mother had died, and she had to take your position in joy luck.  She felt like she never really knew her mother because of their miscommunication.  Suyuan Woo, Jing-Mei’s mother, had many hopes and good intentions for her daughter. While Jing-Mei wanted to be herself and still please her mother, Suyuan wanted her daughter to be a child prodigy. Always wanting the best for her daughter, Suyuan hoped Jing-Mei would one day become an extraordinary pianist.  Although Jing-Mei played the piano, she never put forth much effort into the music because her best was not good enough for her mother.  Nonetheless, she stopped playing the piano.  “I could only be me,” (154).  She could not be something that she was not; she could not live up to her mother’s expectations.  This symbolized one of Jing-Mei’s songs, “Pleading Child.”  Suyuan continues to put all the pressure on Jing-Mei so that she will not become like her mother for all the reasons she had come to America; hopes for a better life.

“Two kinds” is a story, a Chinese girl whose life is influenced by her mother. Her mother came to America after losing everything in China. Jing-Mei’s mother was immigrated early to America from China who has “American dream”. Her mother had high expectations on her daughter and did not care how it could affect her. It made Jing-Mei become a stubborn and rebellious person. “In the years that followed, I failed her so many times, each time asserting my own will, … for unlike my mother, I did not believe I could be anything I wanted to be, I could only be me. (104) She expressed her anger by going against her mother's expectations in ‘who I am’, it inferred that such tendency come from her childhood experiences. Jing-Mei was frustrated because she could not satisfy her mother.

Also, their relationship is shaped by the pressure Suyuan puts on her daughter. When Jing-Mei was growing up, her mother had the need for her daughter to be smart, talented, and a respectful Chinese daughter. This pressure put on Jing-Mei resulted in misunderstanding between mother and daughter. Jing-Mei constantly believed, “that she was disappointing her mother,” because she felt as if she failed at everything her mother wanted her to do. She believed she could never be as perfect as her mother was. Therefore she doesn’t think she is worthy enough to take her mother’s place at the Joy Luck Club “They must wonder now how someone like me can take my mother’s place” (Tan, 27). Jing-Mei does not understand that her mother wanted the best for her; Suyuan wanted Jing-Mei to challenge herself because that is how one builds up character. Suyuan thinks her daughter could do anything she proposed to do but never put enough effort into anything “Lazy to rise to expectations” (Tan 31). Furthermore, Suyuan forced Jing-Mei to learn how to play the piano and then perform at a recital. Jing-Mei rebelled against her mother and refused to learn how to play the piano well. So, at the recital she ends up forgetting the music notes. Jing-Mei blames her embarrassment on her mother and states,

Some may see the mother trying to live her life through her daughter. She invests time trying to make her daughter a prodigy because she was her last hope. The mother lost two children in China and moves to a new country. Coming to America, she felt that immigrants have to prove that they are as talented as or more talented than Americans. This belief is supposed to be the basis for the determination, that the mother has, for Jing-mei to become a prodigy.

In her short story "Two Kinds," Amy Tan utilizes the daughter's point of view to share a mother's attempts to control her daughter's hopes and dreams, providing a further understanding of how their relationship sours. The daughter has grown into a young woman and is telling the story of her coming of age in a family that had emigrated from China. In particular, she tells that her mother's attempted parental guidance was dominated by foolish hopes and dreams. This double perspective allows both the naivety of a young girl trying to identify herself and the hindsight and judgment of a mature woman.

Early in childhood Jing Mei dreamed of finding her prodigy and being a famous Chinese American, mostly because of the views and actions her mother placed on her. Her mother believed you could be anything you wanted to be in America. (pg 405) Her mother was always pushing new tests and talents on Jing Mei. She even went as far as having her daughter Jing Mei models her physical appearance and actions after a child-star Shirley Temple. Her other was always testing her with many different things trying to discover Jing Mei’s talent. Later Jing Mei started to feel like her mother was just trying to make her into someone she was not and started to just fail and not try to do anything right hoping her mother would give up. When her mother died she had realized what her mother had been trying to do. Her mother had only wanted her to do her best. She had then to realize what her mother had

In the article,” Why Chinese Mothers are Superior," author Amy Chua describes how parenting is approached in Chinese culture as compared to "Western parents." She compares Western and Chinese parents on how they approach their children’s' upbringings. She gives examples from her experiences raising her own daughters. Chua's daughters were not allowed to attend sleepovers and could not score grades any lower than an "A" in school classes. Chua also forced her kids in learning a piece for the piano. In separate story, author Amy Tan discusses the mother-daughter relationship in Chinese-American culture in "Two Kinds." This story is told from the viewpoint of an American-born Chinese girl named Jing-mei. Her immigrant mother, Mrs. Woo, believes that being in America is freedom and wants her daughter to take advantage of that freedom. Her mother has her try several activities in an attempt to

At the end of the story, Jing Mei switches her narration from that of a child to that of the adult allowing the reader to see the "adult" perspective on her life. No longer is the relationship between Jing Mei and her mother antagonistic. With the offering of the piano, the mother tells her, "You have natural talent. You could have been genius if you want to" (Tan 1). Jing Mei states that she couldn’t. Then her mother states, "You just not trying" (Tan 1). Her mother bore her no anger or sadness when she made these statements and Jing Mei gave no argument in return.

Another aspect of cultural conflict is that humility and obedient are considered as the traditional virtues of the Chinese culture. Children should unconditionally obey their parents because parents have the ability and willingness to teach and control their children. For example, according to Jing-mei’s mother, Jing-mei has to practice piano assiduously. She would not be punished if she devotes all her effort to playing piano. We can clearly see this point in her mother’s word in the quarrel, “Only two kinds of daughters, those who are obedient and those who follow their own mind! Only one kind of daughter can live in this house. Obedient daughter” (461). But Jing-mei cannot understand this, because she is not familiar to Chinese culture. As a consequence of Jing-mei cannot understand her mother, she does not cooperate and has rebellious attitude against her mother. In the story, Jing-mei decided, “I didn’t have to do what my mother said anymore. I wasn’t her slave. This wasn’t China. I had listened to her before and look what happened. She was the stupid one” (460). As described above, Jing-mei cannot understand the humility and obedient of Chinese culture, even they are recognized as the

Jing-Mei feels differently though, “Unlike my mother, I did not believe I could be anything I wanted to. I could only be me,” (359/80) and she was correct for she had no natural musical talent. Jing-Mei has a desire to please her mother, but an even stronger one to choose her own life. She pacifies her mother by going to piano lessons but puts in no effort. Jing-Mei is “…determined to put a stop to her blind foolishness,” (356/48) but her mother’s desire to create a prodigy to compete with Aunt Lindo’s daughter, keeps her focused on the impossible. That is, until Jing-Mei escalates this conflict to its breaking point in rebellion. Stunning her mother, she shouts “Then I wish I’d never been born! I wish I were dead! Like them,” (359/77) referring to the twin daughters her mother lost in China. Sadly, the mother’s desire to have Jing-Mei conform to her expectations creates a constant battle between mother and daughter, and, in rejecting those expectations, seeing disappointment in her mother’s face all too often causes Jing-Mei to feel, “something inside me began to die” (353/18).

The short story, “Two Kinds”, written by Amy Tan, is written from the point of view of the character named Jing-Mei. There are three experiences which demonstrate her viewpoint. In the first experience, Jing-Mei is being told by her mom about the “American dream”. At first, she strives to pursue this prodigy. Her mom would test her every night after dinner. Through Jing-Mei’s eyes, she starts to realize that it was not the life she wanted to live. Lines in the story illustrate this when he says “I won’t let her change me, I promised myself. I won’t be what I’m not.” (p.406). In the second experience, Jing-Mei performs in a talent show. Her mother forced her to learn how to play the piano. After seeing a little girl playing the piano

Unlike Chinese culture, Jing-Mei starts to revolt against her mother. As a result of her mother

Pulling a child off the path of their dream can cause them to rebel. Rebellious children can be almost impossible to deal with. Jing Mei’s mother decides Jing Mei will take piano lessons and makes arrangements with a retired piano teacher named Mr. Chong exchanging housecleaning services for weekly lessons. Jing Mei shows a lot of anger when her mother tells her of the lessons. “Why don’t you like me the way I am? I’m Not a genius! I can’t play the piano. And even if I could, I wouldn’t go on TV is you paid me a million dollars!” (32) Jing Mei takes the lessons and after a year of daydreaming during practice