Envision spending time with friends at your favorite hangout location. You’re laughing and having a good time. All of a sudden something catches your eye, and bring your happiness to an immediate halt. You see your significant other spending time with another person. You were completely unaware that your spouse was meeting other people. What would be your reaction? Most likely your feelings are hurt, and your confused. After experiencing what you have just seen, do you believe your relationship will be the same now? Many relationships fail due to certain stresses and strains produce commonly in relationships such as – hurt feelings, ostracism, jealousy, lying and betrayal (Miller, 2012). While Some stresses and strains can produce a healthy …show more content…
Traditionally, lying has been viewed as a sinful, undesirable act. Despite the frequency with which lying occurs and the many forms it takes, individuals continue to interpret lying as fundamentally wrong, immoral, and reprehensible (Kaplar & Gordan, 2004). Intimate relationships are not built on “truth and nothing but the truth”. Most individuals around 92% admit to have lied to a romantic partner or can recall an occasion where they were not completely honest with their partners. (Cole, 2001) Deception can be defined as an deliberate behavior that creates an impression in the recipient that the deceiver knows to be untrue. Lying is the most straightforward example of deceptive behavior (Miller, 2012). What drives a partner in an intimate relationship to lie and deceive? Tim Cole states that there are three interrelated explanations – reciprocity being the first. Reciprocity involves the adjustment of resources exchanged based on the provision of others contributions (Cole, 2001) – a tit for tat. In personal relationships, evidence indicates that reciprocity is strong and it involves the exchange of both positive and negative resources such as affection, respect, hostility, and criticism (Cole, 2001). Apply reciprocity to the use of deception, apparent dishonesty from a partner could be seen as the withdrawal of an important relational resource. Meaning a partner will view their …show more content…
People involved in romantic relationships most often expect to have certain needs met exclusively by their romantic partner. Infidelity, affairs, and other forms of sexual and emotional betrayal violate such expectations of exclusivity (Whisman & Wagers, 2005). When a person in a relationship violates their partner’s expected exclusivity they will try to keep the relationship secret from their partner. Thus, discloser of betrayal often involves feelings of being deceived, which are likely to result in disillusionment and further relationship problems. Betrayals almost always have negative, and sometimes lasting, effects on a relationship. Indeed, they are routinely the central complaint of spouses seeking therapy or divorce (Miller,
Television psychologists and pop culture self-help gurus tell us that marriage is hard work; marriage is compromise; marriage is a choice between being right, and being happy. All of these statements are true. What these experts don’t tell us, however, is that marriage is also about putting on blinders, or looking on the bright side, or one of a hundred other trite phrases to explain the art of self-deception. In marriage, there are times when we may find it necessary to look the other way from our spouse’s faults or indiscretions, in the interest of self-preservation. For if we examine these problems too closely, our darkest, most secret fears may come true. Therefore, it can seem easier to focus on the positive. In her poem “Surprise,” Jane Kenyon uses denial, selective perception, and fear of betrayal to illustrate the self-deception that can occur in marriage.
Lying is a common habit that everyone has had experiences with. I have lied and have been lied to numerous times. Everyone has. However, not everyone exposed to a certain lie is aware of it’s true power. In her essay “The Ways We Lie”, Stephanie Ericsson criticizes our bad habit of lying. She explains many different types of lies and even gives examples to show how harmful they can be as “our acceptance of lies becomes a cultural cancer that eventually shrouds and reorders reality until moral garbage becomes invisible to us as water is to a fish” (128).
In Stephanie Ericsson’s essay, “The Ways We Lie”, she discusses the different circumstances in which people lie and describes the types of lies that are commonly used. The author argues that some lies aren’t very severe, and often times are necessary, whereas others can prove to be harmful in the long run and can exact harsh consequences. ( 315 ) Ericsson uses examples in which these lies are presented such as with business acquaintances, politicians or friends and even a priest who breaks ethical code. Ericsson poses the question that if she decided not to lie, if she would be less tolerant of lies told to her. (322) So why do we lie and allow people to lie to us? Does society encourage us to lie or is it
As we all know, lying is a constant part of many people’s lives, whether they realize it or not. Now and then, we’ve all lied to our parents about our homework being completed. (Even though your homework is not done because playing video games or texting your friends is more interesting.) Honestly, lot’s of us have told a lot of white lies or maybe even a whopper of a lie, and we all have varied views on when we should or shouldn 't lie. Such as Brad Blanton, an author of a book about lying and the article, “Honestly, Tell the Truth” who believes in the concept of radical honesty: telling the truth at all times. (excluding a matter of life or death) By cutting out the white lies we tell throughout the course of our lives, there will be less lies to, as Blanton states “unnecessarily complicate our lives.” I agree with Blanton and his opinion that we honestly need to tell the truth and that if we cut out most if the lies we tell, our lives will be free of the aftermath of a lie: damaged relationships and unnecessary amounts of stress. I believe that lying is burdening to the liar who usually fights a losing battle, for he will most likely be found out. I also believe that if we excessively lie, this pattern will become a habit and a problem that will be hard to get rid of in the future. I consider lying to be harmful and damaging to relationships and to negatively affect your character and lower your moral standards. Everyone has lied occasionally, if not frequently, but if
Honesty and deception both play valuable roles in all parts of personal lives and society. Richard Gunderman stated, “To tell the truth is to live authentically and responsibly, to really live.” Living honestly is a way to have less stress to your life, proven by Richard Gunderman in “Is lying bad for us?” However, dishonesty seems to at an all time high with the growth of communication as stated in “On Bullshit” by Harry Frankfurt. In addition, lying can provide incredible short-term benefits discussed by Stephanie Ericsson in “The Ways We Lie.” Gunderman’s claim on authenticity is valid because most cultures see honesty and trust as two of the more lauded values. Telling the truth relieves stress and adds trust. Yet, there is a seemingly
When someone in the relationship is having an affair it’s hard to forgive and move on but there is no magic potion to fix it back together it takes teamwork. The divorce rates are skyrocketing as the years go on. Most marriages don’t even think about seeking help to improve their marriage and they wait too long to even consider help. Marriage is something that people do when they are committed to each other and want to be happy and in love. Many things change this along the way throughout the marriage and solutions to these marital problems are available. Many people think that their solutions are going to work, but they haven’t tried marriage counseling, its easily one of the most effective ways to save marriages.
Lying has a negative connotation in society. Once word goes around about an individual being a liar, the brutality of ostracizing commences, as if the world doesn’t possess enough pressures already. Yet, everyone lies, and lying can have positive benefits. We lie to protect our loved ones, to protect ourselves from harmful individuals or situations, and to avoid information going into the wrong hands. However, there are lies, such as rumors, that are used to destroy others identities, social life, self-concept, and those who habitually need to lie to feel more reassured of themselves as individuals. Lying’s powerful capabilities are bittersweet to say the least, but within justified moderation, they can pull that three-week-old unidentifiable murky colored gum off from the bottom of your shoe.
We are told from a very young that we should tell the truth, and that lying is wrong; an immoral action which we should not engage in. Yet lying is a large part of daily life, whether it be our lying to others or others lying to us, around us, or lying in ways that affect our lives. Oftentimes, the lies we tell are for social gain; for the purposes of esteem, affection, or respect. We lie as a way to manage others impressions of us. Studies have found that women are generally more intimate in their interactions, which would suggest that they lie less. However, might women lie more to benefit others, as opposed to self-centered lies? A study by DePaul et al. (1996) set out to answers questions about the frequency of lying, types of lies told,
A significant form of interpersonal communication that plays an enormous role in relationships is lying. Lying has evolved into a frequent practice in today’s society. Even though, lying seem to be fond upon, we all have done it multiple times for not just our benefit but for others. In relationships, lying is turned from a negative to positive act depending on the circumstances. It seems as if, you lie in attempt to help another person it’s celebrated than if you lie for your benefits. Lying is known to only mislead or give a false impression in which the false hood can only cause negative acts. Why does one enange in lying if the outcome is negative? The most found reason that people find themselves lying is because of the truth. It is said that many people lie because long-term the truth is worse than the short-term lie. Lying is judged off its cost and benefits. In each situation, there will be outcomes when it comes to the lies being told. Lying to those you have impersonal connection with has less of an impact than those you have an interpersonal relationships. Those that has an impersonal relationships is nearly never affected by the lies told because normally they do not see that person as often as those with the close bonds. I understand that lying can be beneficial in relationship of any kind, but I personally feel that the truth is preferred. There are two consequences that puts strain on the relationship. Termination is the last step in a relationship; there are
There is someone who exhibits a desire to have a nice car, high paying job, and even gorgeous family of their own. At the same time, one has the ability to live those dreams. Two young girls who live in impoverish, drug infested neighborhood only dreams to be famous. Even though Mia lacks the right potential and talent, Vanessa can deliver the total package deal to succeed. Both girls have always been the closeness and best of friends believing in each other equally. Enviousness to one’s success, wealth, and lively nature can be demonstrated in ruined relationship.
For the most part, I have to agree with the critical theorists: learning barriers do exist. In wealthier nations, men are still more likely to earn higher salaries for the same positions as held by women. Wealthier families have the means to pay for quality educational experiences and have endless opportunities to continue educational learning opportunities. Demographic factors, such as age and sex can determine who qualifies for educational opportunities. While the government funds the education of our younger children, there is a limited amount of funding available for adults to advance their education. In their pursuit of the American dream, many less fortunate families do not have funds available to participate in educational
This type of cheating is devastating to both the people in the relationship The person cheating may believe that no one will find out, however, that is usually not the case. Especially since they know what they did. Cheating has long term affects on trust and communication in all future relationships. Other people can be affected by the cheating, friends, family members and coworkers.
Management has experienced remarkable shifts in the way that organizations conduct business particularly in the last century, due to the evolving workplace as well as tremendous changes in the roles of leaders in organizations. Early managers often relied on authoritative tactics to get the job done, which we have learned from history does not work very well for many modern organizations. In this paper, I will be analyzing the management approach my organization takes and whether this is the best approach to meet organizational goals and whether or not my organization may benefit from adopting a different approach or combining multiple approaches.
Both man and women will also lie to cover up their brothers, sisters, nephews, bosses, best friends, and of course their loved ones, but in a dissimilar way. I have noticed a bunch of cover up lies that best friends construct for each other including those that have to do with drugs, alcohol, job, school, and other. The person that man would usually lie for is his boss because he/she is the one who is signing his paychecks. His boss might ask one of his/her employees to tell other people that he/she is not in today. There might be a situation when women would have to lie to her sister in-law about her brother going out with another girl. It might be tough to lie about that kind of issue, but if her brother is asking, she will probably do it. Another lying subject is more likely to occur when a man has to lie to his girlfriend's or boyfriend's parents just like I did. For example, once bunch of my friends were going camping for a weekend and my girlfriend's mother wouldn't let my girlfriend go because she is a very strict. I had to lie to her mother that my parents were
No criminal situation should be treated the same. Consequences for crimes should be developed based on several factors. It is safe to say what works for one situation might not work for another. There are different concepts when it comes to dealing with juvenile offenders. Those concepts are treatment (rehabilitative) and punishment (punitive). The treatment or rehabilitative concept is defined as follows: The idea of rehabilitation lays on the presumption that criminal conduct is brought about by some component. This point of view does not deny that individuals settle on decisions to infringe upon the law, however it asserts that these decisions are not a matter of pure "free will." Instead, the choice to perpetrate a wrongdoing is held to be resolved, or possibly intensely affected, by a man 's social surroundings, mental improvement, or biological makeup. Individuals are not all the same—and along these lines allowed to express their will—but instead are distinctive. These "individual differences" shape how individuals carry on, including whether they are prone to infringe upon the law. At the point when individuals are portrayed by different "criminogenic risk factors, for example, an absence of parental love and supervision, peer pressure, antisocial values; they more likely to be included in wrongdoing than individuals not having these experiences and traits. “Punishment, in criminal law, any pain, penalty, suffering, or confinement inflicted upon a person by the