The Story of Us Essays

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Using the Gibb categories give three examples of defensive and or supportive behaviors that Ben and Katie used in the film.
“The story of us” is an excellent movie that portrays the roller-coaster of marriage in a humorous and cleaver way. The film reiterates the key concepts we have learned in our interpersonal communication class, in particular chapters ten and eleven on conflict management and improving communication climates. According to Gibb people feel defensive when they perceive that they are under attack. When defensive responses arise in interpersonal communications, it is the relationship itself that becomes defensive. This is evident in the Jordan’s communication patterns, the majority of exchanges between Ben and Katie
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In the story of Harold and the purple crayon, when Harold wants to go for a walk in the moonlight, but there is no moon, he draws one. Similarly Ben’s views of marriage and relationships is unrealistic, he states

that he has always imagined life to be like this "Two people meet, fall in love and then 50-60 years later one of them dies and then a few days after that the other dies because it just can't live without each other (Reiner Rob, 2001)".
Defensive behavior from one party in a relationship evokes defensive behavior on the part of the other. This dynamic cycle of defensiveness can intensify as described In Gibb’s second category of defensive behavior, control in the film this is exhibited in the scene when Ben and katie return from a romantic holiday in Venice. Their first night back, they compose a cuddly letter to their two kids, who are off at camp. Within minutes, the conversation is dotted with grace notes of dissatisfaction, which grow steadily louder until they've drowned out everything else. Should Ben and Katie have sex now, or after they finish the letter? Was Katie more spontaneous in Venice? Was the vacation a charade? ''I just don't want us to get to the point,'' says Ben, ''where we can't make love unless there's a concierge downstairs.''(Reiner Rob, 2001)". The argument isn't really about sex, of course. It's

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