Wedding Speech For A Wedding Speech

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Ladies and gentlemen, if there's anybody here this afternoon who's feeling nervous, apprehensive and queasy at the thought of what lies ahead…… it's probably because you have just married David Watson. To those of you who don’t know me yet. My name is Conner and I would like to thank David for finally confirming that I am actually the BEST man! I’ve actually looked forward to this moment for a long time. It will be the first time I’ve been able to speak for five minutes in David’s presence without being interrupted by his motor mouth. Now it’s not that I’m saying that David is loud but he doesn’t know how to shut up. With David, you very definitely hear him before you see him. It’s great to see that everyone is enjoying the wedding today, but I have to say that being best man you get to see behind the scenes – and let me tell you it isn’t pretty. Tears, hissy fits, chucking lipstick and mascara all over the place luckily, I’ve heard that Sam was better behaved than the groom. Quite clearly, no expense has been spared in creating this wonderful occasion for us all to enjoy. And by the way, please don't worry if you have heard any unusual noises during the speeches it's only David’s wallet groaning in agony. Looking around this packed room, it's surprising just how far some people are prepared to travel to eat free food. It's a good job David didn’t choose the menu, otherwise you would have been very disappointed to have come all this way for chicken nuggets and juice boxes.

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