When I was a little girl, I used to love to draw in the dust on the back of car windows. One day, I drew “I <3 you Me Me” while waiting for the bus. My mom drove to the gas station and when she got out of her car, a woman came up to her and said: “I saw what was written on the back of your car, and I was wondering how it got there.” My mother explained that I had written it earlier that morning waiting for the bus. The woman teared up and said, “My grandson used to call me ‘Me Me’, and he recently passed away. I felt like that was written for me.” To this day I still feel chills when I think about it, and I’ve come to understand that I was put here to comfort others and brighten their day. I don’t really fancy the word “empath” because …show more content…
It’s not fashionable or cool to be nice in the modern day world, and I try hard to change that. In a society that would rather hold an impersonal conversation over iMessage instead of talking face to face, we’ve lost kindness and compassion. A simple “are you okay?” or “do you want to talk?” is a big step in the right direction of supporting our fellow humans. I’ve come to learn that there are basically three main emotions people feel: happiness, sadness, and fear. Happiness could be anything from excitement to love to overwhelming joy. Sadness is complicated because many other emotions end up being sadness when you analyze it. You lost a round of Mario Kart and you’re mad, well, why are you mad? Is it because you failed, and does failing make you sad? Anything pertaining to anger is sadness-based, but sadness can also be felt as heartbreak, longing, and confusion. Fear expresses itself in anxiety, jealousy, and hatred. Another thing I’ve learned about people is that we’re scared to be confident and believe in our talents. It’s a bad thing to love yourself and the things that you accomplish. Even while writing this, I’m finding myself starting to squirm at highlighting my thoughts and beliefs. Understanding how and why people feel these emotions aids in calming them down, but not every person is the
My aunt whom just so happened to be one of my role models passed away. I was devastated. Not only was I confused, but I was lost as well. A woman I looked up to was gone forever. I missed a few days of school and starting falling behind on work. It took me awhile to process my aunt's’ death. I finally realized that I have to move on. I knew that she would not approve of me being sad. I started remembering all of the positive memories my aunt left behind. I gained a tremendous amount of knowledge from her. Until this day, I carry what she taught me everywhere I go. I strive harder to make her
Ben-Shahar speaks correctly while discussing how individuals must give themselves permission to experience negative feelings before they reach the point where they can completely experience the positive feelings. Therefore, positive feelings are inadvertently blocked by negative feelings. Dr. Mathieu (2011) from Psychology Today, discusses how “providing so many positive solutions can inadvertently blame people for their suffering” (para. 3). Henceforth, whenever people see articles on being happy and social media posts where everyone has their happiest face on, they do not accept the it is okay to have negative feelings as well. Ben-Shahar discusses how many people feel inferior while experiencing negative feelings, but in reality every person except the dead and psychopathic experience the same feelings. Counseling Directory (2016) identifies that “we are continually setting ourselves up to fail” (para. 5). Furthermore, acting as part of the human race means that individuals are imperfect. Striving to reach perfection is the beginning of failure because of the impossibility forever block the
On May 11th 2013, my grandma passed away due to pancreatic cancer. A little later that year on September 25th, my mom received a call from my aunt in Guam that my dad had passed away in his sleep. Then on May 14th 2014, my grandpa passed from complications of an allergic reaction to a medication. So within a year, I was left to deal with three immediate family deaths, one right after another. Losing such important figures in one’s life could leave someone depressed and unmotivated to move on with their own life and to rise above those challenges is difficult, yet possible. During this time of hardship, I grew discouraged and saddened, but over time I became motivated to set aside these struggles and make a change.
It is a challenge for many who have lost loved ones and must learn to overcome their loss by using different coping mechanisms and symbolizations. Sebold shows how coping with grief is heard because humans hold emotional bonds with each other and as a result of The Lovely
As soon as my eyes woke up to the bitter cold of the night and stars covered by black blanket of clouds, I knew that this was it. I had tried to prepare myself that day, but I was at school when it happened. The moment the intercom came over the classroom, “Hailey Wooldridge needs to come the office, her mom is here to check her out,” my heart stopped. I was able to make it to the office without losing my composure, but as soon as my eyes met my mom standing there with tears in hers I lost it. Right there standing in the school office, the food gates of heaven opened up in my eyes and I could not stop the rivers from flowing. My best friend since kindergarten had died. All the planning of moving in together when we went to college was down the drain. The late nights of watching horribly filmed scary movies was done. My heart was broken, and the pieces are still not taped together properly. Two days later was her funeral. Her mother had asked me to say a couple of words about her during the service, but the thought of standing next to her lifeless body talking about her and not to her made everything seem surreal. By the power of prayer and numerous amounts of tears, I stood up from my seat and walked lifelessly to the podium that viewed hundreds of people waiting to see what I had to say. I do not know how I got through that speech without hysterically crying, but somehow, I talked like I was having a conversation with Serra once again. In front of me, I
Bowen,D.E, & Strickler,S. L. (2004). A good friend for bad times: helping others through grief. Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg Fortess
To empathize is to understand what another person is feeling, and to be able to view the world from their perspective. In Harper Lee’s To Kill a Mockingbird, Jem and Scout Finch learn how to display empathy under the influence of their father. Atticus Finch teaches Jem and Scout to empathize through his demonstrations, advice, and encouragement, so that they may influence the future of Maycomb County to know the difference between right and wrong.
Reading about the experiences leaves me feeling more empathic towards my clients with depression. Though I do speak about depression and suicide in my Coping with Loss group, which I facilitate, reading this book leaves me with a greater understanding of what my clients may be going through (especially when it is difficult for them to express themselves).
I never expected anyone to be this heartbroken over my death. Here I was 15 year old boy named Andy Hollows. My death was tragic, Leukemia is never easy to deal with. I was currently watching my mom wrap Christmas presents for my younger sibling. This is their first Christmas without me and I wasn’t too happy with my dad acting like a Grinch this time of the year in this exact situation. Lord knows my mom did not need it, nobody did in fact they were depressed, heartbroken, lost, and dull. I was always the one to cheer them up when they were sad, help Mom decorate for christmas, and help my younger sister, Ann pick out a ugly Christmas sweater to wear. I was interrupted out of my dark and useless thoughts by the door bell ringing.
While everyone around me was grieving, I stood and held on to her hand, hoping she would feel my presence and wake up from my touch. But some things are too good to be true. The reality was that I was holding onto more than just my best friend’s hand. I was holding onto her dead soul which became another victim of cancer. I had to say good-bye one last time. “You will always be my best friend,” I whispered slowly in her ears with my trembling chapped lips. With just that it felt like my emotions had escaped from me, as if I had taken a long deep breath and
Sometimes when you go through hardships you feel that you are alone and there is nobody there for you. Recently this past year I lost my grandfather I didn't really understand why it had to happen the way it did it was just a lot for me. When it all happened I just kind of boxed myself in this little corner. I didn't want to do anything I just wanted to be to myself. This really started to affect me in every way I just honestly went into a depression. Loss and Grief can be really depressing for a lot of people especially when it’s someone that you are very close to. I and my grandfather were very close he was somebody that I would see almost every day. For him to be gone where I can no longer be with him was very hard for me. It took me awhile
When I turned 11-years-old my whole childhood began to change my life went from being perfect to everything but perfect. One day I came home to hear the news my father, my best friend; my hero was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. Not knowing the struggle my family was about to take on I just began to cry. I had a million things running through my head what’s going to happen? Will everything be okay? Why him? What is going to happen? With all these things rushing through my head all I could do was cry not knowing this was least worse to come.
After Griff’s death I have just wanted to be alone. But when people don’t care that i’m absent, it hurts. I know it’s my own fault for becoming invisible, for isolating myself but for once i just want someone to notice when i’m down. Someone to actually care what is going on inside my brain, what i am thinking before i go to sleep. To be there when i’m crying and are ready to let go of life, love and time. I remember when I was younger and I learned about depression, anorexia, self harm and anxiety in health and I would wonder how people came to that point and I would think that I would never be or do any of those things. Yet here I am 20 years later, at 3 am sobbing to myself debating wether or not to take my own life. I have been writing poems a lot lately about Griff, my hobby and just life in general. I would like to share one that I wrote the day after I started my “hobby”. It goes like this “Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you. But the roses are wilted and the violets are dead. And the empty bottles are scattered around
It is a challenge being an empath. It implies that you can handle energy for other individuals. You feel everything, regardless if you are aware of it or not. Numerous empaths figure out ways on how to close down overpowering emotions.
One insight that I gained about my own experience in addressing grief is that it has made me a stronger person; in addition, I am truly able to be more empathetic with people who have lost someone or something important to them. Being empathetic is a strong skill as a social worker, as we are working with people who may have experienced a great deal of loss in their lives. At the age of 24, I have had to attend four funerals for my grandparents. Therefore, I have experienced a lot of grief for how young I am. Learning how to cope has truly made me a stronger person. I have learned to cherish all the fantastic memories that I have with each one of my grandparents. My partner lost his uncle this past February, which was one of his first experiences losing a loved one. Because of my experience with loss, I