Personal Narrative Essay About Suicide

How I changed from this semester to the end of the semester is that I am not turning in late work anymore because I have learned my lesson with all my teachers. I used to turn in a lot of late work and they would not count it as a grade.

I never in my life imagined that I would go through something traumatic as suicide. I say that because I am a very happy person but sometimes even the happiest person is also hurting on the inside. I remember the day and time when the whole scenario occurred. I was home alone and very distraught with where my life was headed. I was in a mentally draining relationship and I felt absolutely low of myself. This was rare for me because I am a very outgoing individual, who barely cares about what others think about me. I was feeling excessively lonely, angry, tired, misused and drained from my current situation. It was like I felt all these emotions at once but nothing I would do could ease the pain. Suicide played in my mind all the time in this difficult period. Death seem so much easier to deal with but I was terribly wrong.

Problems with my parents were the main reason why I fell into depression. I used to cut myself and I tried to kill myself more than once, I felt that I didn’t matter but I tried my best to continue. In

I learned that our thinking can make bad decisions. Our thoughts can change with comparing things. We can say no to one thing, but if it is compared to something else that can change our mind. The comparison can make things look different in our mind to make us make a different decision. The information that I learned is important because it helps you to look at things differently now. Sometimes it is best to stick with your first choice or decision and can cause an irrational decision.

I started to hate myself soon after, always used to say to myself “Why am I like this?”. This one day has changed that, my dad said; “Be yourself and everyone would like you.” So that day I thought about what

Some people dwell on things and allow them to swallow up their lives. I’ve learned that some things just aren’t worth it. Second lesson, family comes first. I’ve learned the hard way too many times that your family will always support you, and have your back. Even though they did not always agree with the decisions I’ve made, they never stopped supporting me nor stopped loving me. Third lesson, do what makes you happy. Everyone always speaks about having money and a luxurious job. I would prefer to make decent paycheck and wake up happy with the job I have, than make a bunch of money and dread waking up every morning to go to work. Lastly, be grateful. Be grateful for the love you have received; be grateful for the times your parents yelled at you because it means they care, be grateful for the memories you share and overall be grateful for the life you’ve lived.

These thoughts would overwhelm my brain daily. I told my parents about how I was feeling, what they said was “you have the choice to be happy or to mope”. This was the worst thing I could possibly hear. The summer before grade 12, I acted on my suicidal thoughts, leading me into the psychiatric ward for a couple weeks. Soon my parents got educated about what was going on, it was hard for them to understand but soon became extremely supportive. The beginning of grade 12 I had my second attempt, my final attempt happened the summer of 2016. During this time I would see psychiatrist, and I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder. This diagnosis made me feel better in understanding why I feel the way I do and that I am not alone in this. I went through medication after medication until I found the right suit for me. I slowly but surely started feeling better. I began to go to a day hospital for mood disorders called STAT in February 2017 for five weeks, learning so much about myself and learning strategies to help me with my symptoms and learning to cope with them. I have become a strong person, fighting each battle as they come. I made it so far, and I am truly proud of myself for

This might be one of the hardest things, I will do in group because I have learned so much about myself. I have no idea what you went and are going through on a day to day basis. I can not begin to imagine the feeling you had about me when you came home to the first search warrant. You could have felt; disappointed, sad, hurt, shocked or let down.

comes back full force. My straight A’s start to drop to D’s and E’s, I quit all my after-school activities, stopped talking to everyone, and started to skip school almost everyday. I had always struggled with depression, but it had never been this bad before, I felt like I was drowning and she was pulling me down with her. I struggled a lot with my depression, I had to go to the emergency room twice during the school year for suicide attempts, I just wanted to give up on everything. During this time things kept getting worse and worse, tension kept on building between my mom and me and I still hadn't seen my dad. I remember that night so clearly as if it was yesterday. My mom and I had been arguing all day, We were in my room and kept on arguing

“All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten” is a book written by Robert Fulgham. I do agree with this book’s “rules”. I simply think that they would work in the real world. If we all tried I’m sure we could make the world a better world. It would take time but the payoff would be amazing.

Contemplating suicide, alone for 6 years starting at age 10 who was meant to be out enjoying “the best years of her life”, is an incredibly difficult thing to wake up to and think about every day. I hate being labelled and knowing I cannot control these things hurts. Spending weeks, months, years in and out of hospitals is probably one of the most difficult times. Especially, not being able to understand why I was doing these things. People wouldn’t necessarily ever see and/or hear about a 10-year-old attempting suicide. Unfortunately, I was one of those rare 10 year olds. It was hard not being able to understand why I wanted to die or hurt myself every day. I landed myself in BGH over 35 times and McMaster 5 different times for each stay spanning from 2-4 weeks.

I was blamed for our struggling times. To others this would just be a statement and they would question why I allowed it to affect me; however, it became my prison. I would seek refuge in my room only to have endless nights. I spent hours staring at myself in a mirror, observing the way I act and talk. I would release my inner inhibitions and return to the decoy that everyone knew. All the crying allowed me to release the pain that slowly built up, but that only made room for more unhappiness.

But in spite of all the negatives that came from this nightmare, one positive came from it. I learned something, I learned that you shouldn’t take the things that make you happiest in life for granted because it could all be gone and change suddenly, in the blink of an

Waiting in line to go through customs I didn 't want to think about all all the things I would have to do. Support myself financially, find a place to live, figure out how to start college. It all seemed overwhelming. I immigrated on my own to US when I was seventeen. The transition was difficult, and I considered returning back to India. Even though it would have been easier to return, staying provided better opportunities. As I grappled with my new environment and struggled to acclimate. Two experiences played a pivotal role in shaping my character. First, the support I received from family and friends. The second, my work with adolescent youth. Through these I understood the importance of support and the joy of providing it. The

My life has been a crazy roller coaster with many events that have affected my life all in different ways. There have been times where my life has been at its highest peak in the world then it falls down, right into a deep valley. From the time my lovable younger sister came into my life to when my grandpa had a near death experience, I have learned many valuable lessons through the rough times as well as the more happy times. When I was a young girl, my mom had always told me the same thing over and over again. I never really thought about how a few words would have a deep effect on me in a short amount of time.