What I Really Me?

When I was younger at age 8, is when my family would say “You will not always be so skinny, enjoy it while you can” Being 8 years old, I thought my family was crazy and was just trying to scare me. As I got older I ate whatever I wanted, assuming I will always have a fast metabolism. Little did I know, it was about to go down hill. At age 16, I realized my weight started to increase. The higher the scale went, the more depressed I became. I did not like how

I think part of the reason I’m upset is because of you. Like I have never ever allowed myself to open up to anyone. I don’t like the idea of someone knowing everything about me and not knowing if the friendship will last, because if it doesn’t that person will live their life knowing everything about me. I remember that’s what we’d argue about, me thinking this wouldn’t last. Ever since September, you changed dramatically. You used to want to know everything that was going on. Now I try to tell you a story or try to tell you what’s going on, and you have no interest. I’ll be like “I broke my leg” and you’ll say “oh damn, feel better.” I’m not saying that’s wrong I’m saying I miss having a person I tell every little thing to. I said I feel like

I was in the first grade when my weight increased significantly with no clear reason. After being tested for several different health conditions, we found out that I had been born with insulin resistance. This was a very hard time for my family and me because we had to figure out how to change our lifestyle in order to accommodate my new circumstances. But we did, and as my health increased I began to lose weight. However, after a while, I began to resent taking my medication and wanted to be able to eat all of the other foods my friends were able to enjoy.

When I was sixteen, I got my first job. I remember being beyond excited to start making my own money and have extra money for gas. The girls I worked with at work often talked about diets and cleanses, as many girls do. However, given that I was already falling into a dark hole, I probably should have removed myself from the situation. When work would get slow, I would look the calories up in certain foods we served. I began being able to recite

Anyway, I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. I hate that I’ve been so distant lately. I just haven’t felt like talking much, so I’ll go ahead and tell you right now what is going on. I don’t know exactly when it started,

There would be periods, usually a week-long, where I wouldn't eat. I would later get hungry and start binging and hide food in my room. My mom and dad would find the stashes of food tucked away, and I'd be grounded. I felt so ashamed that I'd stop eating again. It was a vicious cycle that I

Shatana Dalton was born on March 7 at the Women’s Hospital in Greensboro, North Carolina. She grew up in a small country town not far from Greensboro, called Madison, in Rockingham County. Within this town, there was a smaller community named Goodwill in which she and her entire family was a part of. Goodwill was in reference to the church she went to every Sunday as child, Goodwill First Baptist Church. Shatana and her older sister played sports as recreation, well only one sport which was soccer. It was ironic that both Shatana and her sister fell in love with soccer since both of her parents played softball. Nevertheless, none of this information answers

Around the age of ten is when things started getting weird with me. Whether it was my personality or it was my physical appearance. Around this time is when I started to dance with my older sister Katie. I never liked it as much as she did. I hated the make up that we had to wear before we preformed, and I hated that you had to get your hair into this tiny bun on the top of your head. Back then I had no hair which made it ten times worse. After five years of dancing, I gave it up and started to focus on school more. Obviously with me not doing a single thing during that time period and being a very picky eater, I started to gain a lot of weight.

What defines you as a person depends on you. You define yourself by how you act, what you say, and what you do in life. It seems quite simple, yet people still have a rough time finding their identity. Especially, when you are younger. In the adolescent years they learn countless new lessons from life and are slowly finding who they are as a person. The experiences adolescents go through can be very difficult. The experiences vary with the person and some encounter more than others. It doesn’t matter who’s experience is worse though. Everyone’s experience is what brings them to that time when they finally understand who they are. Right now as I have and am going through my adolescent years I have a general idea of my identity. I am impatient, stubborn, opinionated, kind, passionate, funny occasionally, and much more. A few features that define who I am and why I am like this. One specific feature is my anxiety.

Usually I am sarcastic and blunt in nature, I usually don't hold my tongue back with people because people do deserve the truth and not the sugar coated version of it. Being who I am make it seem like I'm this mean person when I really am not. Sometimes I am not this talkative person because there is a time to talk and a time to just be quiet and listen so I know what is asked of me. Now combining sarcastic, blunt, and not so talkative can make seem like I'm standoffish at times and I know that I can be at times. Those closest to me know that I am the one to tell it like it and know that I'm a listener rather be the one that talks. Even with this perception of me when I participate in clubs and school activities usually people see that this is who and that at times I do have my moments. What this shows about me is that for the most part I am the type of person that rather stay to myself at times and that if you want the truth I'll give it to you, I am a simple person.

As far as I can remember I was always overweight, but I never payed attention to me being "big" or even "fat," because I felt normal. I never realized my size until third or fourth grade when it would be pointed out constantly and for years after. I never knew I would be facing a personal war that would later in life, change me. My family members had made fun of me, but I never let it actually get to me. Maybe, I hadn't loved myself or maybe I just loved food too much. A couple of years later about 8th or 9th grade, I wanted to make a change. I wanted to feel better about myself. I started working out, I started walking, then running. My mom and dad would even try to help me by getting me into Zumba and many other sports like soccer and softball.

I was born _name__ on _date__ in _place__. I am a son, brother, uncle, nephew, cousin, and friend. I was desperately shy as a small child, but grew out of it. My teen years were happy times sports, friends, summers spent in __place_. It all helped shape me into who I am today. My interests are many. I have always enjoyed reading about history and follow the history channel faithfully. I love music. It's been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I find it calming when life gets rocky.

It all started ever since I was a little boy, about 12 years old. I used to eat a lot of food; you might even say I was addicted to eating. I would eat no matter what. When I was sad I would eat, when I was happy I would eat. Basically my emotional mind state would be dependent on eating food. With that surplus of food, there was something else that made my physical state even worse. I was extremely lazy and unmotivated. I had no ambition; I would just sit around all day playing video games. So you could imagine what happened to me with this huge surplus of food and lack of activity. I was extremely overweight, I weighed 247 lbs.( 40% body fat) at the age of 14. This took a toll on me mentally and physically. For example, anytime that I would go to the mall with my friends, I would suffer a lot. I would see them trying on clothes and buying new clothes, while these clothes would barley fit me. Also many people would make fun of me.

The first thoughts I had of why I am who I am came in 8th grade, maybe even a year or two before that. As cliche as it sounds, thinking about why you are who you are holds a lot of weight when it comes to finding answers to these ignored questions: Why am I so damn stubborn? How come I am always the first kid in 3rd grade recess to volunteer to eat the mud-covered worm? Why is it that I have emotions, but they have trouble surfacing? A mere sample of perplexing questions that have permeated my mind throughout my life. I gaze back upon my timeline and piece together the answers, through experiences, to these thoughts. As I come to realize, all the answers can be found in my personality, my values of the past and present, and my mom.

If I had to be honest, I have always known that my eating habits could use some work. I do not eat enough foods that are nutrient dense, and I consume too many fats. However, this also reminds me that I have improved my habits a little. For example, Before I started college and really started this journey towards healthy living I could have easily eaten a whole Hershey’s chocolate bar, but instead I only ate a half, and that half was not in one whole sitting. Another example is related to the items I had for breakfast. Usually, I would get the tater tots that serve with breakfast, but I chose to get an apple instead because I knew it would be healthier for me. With this said, I do not eat breakfast on a regular basis. I am good about eating lunch and dinner, but I have a bad habit of not getting a meal first thing in the morning.