What Is Hooking Up?

Across the U.S. college students on a variety of campuses have part taken in what is commonly known as the “hookup culture.” The hookup culture does not always have to include sexual intercourse although it most often does, but it is merely the idea of having physical pleasure with another person outside of an emotional relationship. College students, even at some of America’s most prestigious colleges realize hooking up has completely overthrown the idea of being in an actual relationship. Emily Foxhall a Yale student wrote an article for the Yale Daily News in 2010 stating that the hookup culture is so prevalent on Yale’s campus because students have enough stress to worry about, casual hookups are easy (Foxhall, 2010). The question becomes, is the college hookup culture vital and normal to the college experience or should it be condemned for being harmful to college age persons mentality.

Of students who reported hooking up, 41 percent used words such as “regretful,” “empty,” “miserable,” “disgusted,” “ashamed,” “duped” and even “abused” to describe the experience. An additional 23 percent expressed ambivalence, and the remaining 36 percent said they were more or less “fine” with hookups — “fine” being the most common description.

Free-and-easy sex prides itself on being commitment free, no emotional ties attached. Today, this idea of leaving all emotions at the door is the supposedly, sophisticated choice on campus. It is now well understood that traditional dating in college has mostly gone the way of the landline, replaced by “hooking up”- an ambiguous term that can signify anything from making out to oral sex to intercourse - all complete without the emotional entanglement of a real relationship. As times have changed, students begin to view a relationship as “too time consuming” and something that no longer takes priority amongst their busy, high achieving schedules. However, hooking up threatens the sexual, physical, and psychological health of college-age youth. Today’s youth may want to think twice before engaging in the prevalent hook-up culture. Despite the popularity of positive feelings, hookups can include negative outcomes including emotional and psychological injury, and even more concerning consequences such as unintended rape. In order to protect our generation, and more specifically our women, society must acknowledge the detrimental effects of a hook up culture to create a greater understanding surrounding this risky sexual behavior and ensure a more powerful, positive presence for women in our society. The combination of a society seeped in rape culture and an alcohol infused hookup culture creates a compromising sexual environment where women have limited control, opening the

In Frank Bruni’s article “The Real Campus Scourge,” the main argument that many college freshmen are extremely lonely at the start of their college careers is supported by numerous testimonials and statistics, which add to the credibility of the argument and ultimately make the argument very believable.

In the book, Hooking Up, the author, Kathleen Bogle, devotes most of her research to interviewing male and female undergraduates and alumni. Throughout her book, she uses various methods to expose the complexity of hookups and the actualities of the gender “rules” on college campuses. The techniques Bogle uses are: explaining the norms of the hooking up culture prior to the twentieth century, describing how the ambiguity of the term “hooking up” on college campuses creates misconstrued ideas about other college students, and comparing the difference between males and females in the hook up culture.

For our final book, I read American Hookup by Lisa Wade. In the book, Wade shines a light on the prominent hookup culture in universities today. From exploring changing dynamic from ‘calling’ to hook up culture, the experiences of enthusiasts that participate in hookup culture, and the reality for those who decide not to participate in hookup culture. In the end, Wade make several conclusions on the process of hookup culture like the participant is typically drunk or under the influence of some type of drug, girls and guys both look at their opinions of their friends when deciding whether or not to hook up, and that it’s most important be having ‘fun’ while sticking to the many unspoken rules of hookup culture.

In the book American Hookup: The New Culture of Sex on Campus, By Lisa Wade, she addresses the issues and concerns that she sees within the “hookup culture”. Lisa Wade’s book is a mixture of important statistics and personal accounts of what happens in the hookup culture on various college campuses. To define the hookup culture that Wade is addressing, we can look to the book as Lisa defines the hookup culture as essentially casual sex with no strings attached, another sociologist Kathleen Bogle described this as a “new norm” for campuses and that this an be very harmful for women especially (Wade, 2017, p.16). Michael Kimmel a well-known sociologist of masculinity was quoted saying that hooking up is “guys-sex” and that guys run the

Allison, Rachel, and Barbara J. Risman. "A Double Standard For “Hooking Up”: How Far Have We Come Toward Gender Equality?." Social Science Research 42.(2013): 1191-1206. ScienceDirect. Web. 20 Nov. 2016.

The reading that interested me most was “The Decline of the Date and the Rise of the College Hook Up” by Paula England and Rueben J. Thomas. The initial motive for this research was that an undergraduate student of England’s “wanted to do a research paper on why students on campus didn’t date much anymore” (pg 69). The two researchers, England and Thomas, then began questioning students on Stanford University’s campus about what they thought about the increasing occurrence of hook ups as compared to going out on dates.

Hooking up has become an increasingly studied culture by many sociologists around the country. These studies have been done to understand the shift from the old culture of dating to the new culture of hooking up that we experience now. Many people find it interesting that the kids of our generation have become so sexualized and carefree compared to the college days of our parents. Many people wonder how we got to this point and how the dynamics of hookups work, and why we continue to go on with them even sometimes at cost of our mental and physical help. One of these people was Kathleen A. Bogle, who wrote an entire book on the subject called, Hooking Up: Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus, which is the focal point of this essay.

Allie Bukatman’s popular press article “The Hook-Up Culture Has Killed The Possibility Of Dating In College,” examines what precisely the hook-up culture is and why it’s not necessarily a good thing. Bukatman focuses on the expectations of the hook-up culture, explanations for this casual sex phenomenon, causes for why commitment is an intimidating thing, and power in relationships, all the while providing her perspective on this matter.

College and universities have made great strides over the years. The campuses have grown, and the resources have improved tremendously. However, it is questionable if that social scene on these campuses has changed for the better over the years. “Work hard, party hard” has become the motto of college students to live by. Students spend the week focused on their academics, striving to grow as intellects. However, the weekend becomes the time when students look to go out and socialize at the various parties. And this is exactly what the weekend is for. With growing causal party scenes, college students have been more inclined to have a casual relationship with the opposite sex. Traditional dating on college campuses is rarely seen anymore

The students who do not adapt and choose to abstain are immediately labeled negatively. By choosing not to participate in the universal activity on campus, these students limit their social life. This is a tremendous sacrifice. College supposedly represents the best years a person’s of life. No one wants to miss out due to being perceived as overwrought and uptight. For this reason,

“Hooking up” or “hookup” is a broad term containing different meanings to different people, but in this case, the definition within the Encyclopedia of Gender and Society will be used. Hunter (2009) defines hookups as any kind of sexual activity that takes place without any form of romantic relationship established. They are casual sexual encounters that do not involve finding a husband or wife (Hunter 2009). This new culture allows young individuals to rid themselves of their sexual urges, without the commencement of a personal and emotional relationship established with the other party (Hunter, 2009). Not only does it allow sexual gratification, but it permits individuals to explore their sexuality (Hunter 2009).

In addition to the social aspects, college teaches how to develop independent thinking. It also “exposes future citizens to material that enlightens and empowers them, whatever careers they end up choosing” (Menand, 3). However, most students today perceive college fundamentally as a party scene and various forms of entertainment instead of focusing on school work. They have forgotten about the academic freedom provided by receiving a proper college education.