What Makes A Friendship?

There are over six billion people on Earth today. Each of those people has countless relationships, which extend further into an immense network of relations among thousands of individuals. These relations can be romantic, professional, unconditional, mutual, or the strongest of all, friendship. Friendship is a term used to denote co-operative and supportive behavior between two or more beings. In this sense, the term connotes a relationship which involves mutual knowledge, esteem, and affection and respect along with a degree of rendering service to friends in times of need or crisis. Friends will welcome each other's company and exhibit loyalty towards each other, often to the point of altruism.

In The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle claims that there are three types of friendships. The three friendships being that of utility, pleasure, and virtue. First, in Sections 1-3, I will explain Aristotle’s claims of the three types of friendship. After that, in Section 4, I will examine Aristotle’s argument that there are two friendships that are not as lasting as the other friendship. Then, in Section 5, I will analyze whether or not the friendship of virtue can occur between only virtuous people. Next, in Section 6, I will evaluate whether or not true friendship is the friendship of virtue like Aristotle claims. Lastly, in Section 7, I will object to Aristotle’s claims.

From humanity comes friendship, but friendship may not be as one-dimensional and simplistic as the common person believes it to be- it may not stop at the surface level. In David Whyte’s book, Consolations: The Solace, Nourishment and Underlying Meaning of Everyday Words, he writes on friendship, exposing the true facets of an authentic friendship that oftentimes are overlooked by many people. In Whyte’s opinion, friendship is an eternal experience, or at least an experience in which people take part over an extended period of time. The need for continuous support and forgiveness from and for both parties in a friendship presupposes this prolonged temporality. Naturally, as friendships take constant conscious effort, they require interest

In The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle argues that friendship is the greatest of external goods which is necessary to live a pleasant life. Aristotle then proceeds to define three different kinds of friendships: utility, pleasure, and purpose. He begins his argument with examining friendship based on utility. He claims that under this friendship, both people derive some benefit from the other. He indicates that this type of friendship is when two people use one another to be able to better oneself with the help of the other partner in the friendship. Aristotle further supports this claim when he states, “Now those who love each other because of utility do not love each other for themselves but in virtue of some good which they get from each other,” (Nicomachean Ethics, p.144) implying that this is the type of love that people get from one another for the purpose of getting some type of good (idk if good is a good word here) out of the other person. (kinda sounds like a wordy sentence) The good that the other person is getting out of the friendship

According to Aristotle, one can experience three different types of friendship. The first type is a friend who is used for utilitarian purposes. Aristotle, however, quickly dismisses this type. As an example, Aristotle explains that one could never be friends with wine; while wine is satisfying to the person drinking the wine, no person ever wishes wine good fortune (Aristotle, 32). In order for a relationship between two people to be considered a friendship, one must want good things for the person who they consider their friend and vice versa (Aristotle, 32). Aristotle continues to describe another type of friendship, which is friendship for pleasure. According to Aristotle, young adults are most likely to pursue pleasure-related friendships, because the young are more likely to live to please their emotions; they develop friendships and erotic relationships quickly (Aristotle, 33). Aristotle notes that since young people make decisions based on their emotions, they are quick to change passions, friendships, and lovers (Aristotle, 33). Although both parties receive equal pleasure in this type of friendship, Aristotle says that it is not a complete type of friendship because it is short-lasting (Aristotle, 33). Aristotle considers only one type of friendship to be complete, and that is friendship that is devoted to the other person’s virtue. This type of friendship, Aristotle says, is a friendship that is developed slowly and infrequently; this is the only type of

Friendships of pleasure are based on the amount of pleasure the people get from being in the relationship. People who go to football matches together, or who go to the pub together might be in this type of relationship. They are friends for their own sake, because the friendship brings them pleasure and enjoyment, not for their friend’s sake. Friendships of pleasure are common among young people. Young people quickly become friends and quickly cease to be friends because what pleasures them changes constantly.

In Aristotle’s book Nicomachean Ethics, book eight; he talks about three different types of friendship. Aristotle believes in three different types of friendship, the three being utility, pleasure, and good/virtue. Friendship that is based off of utility is good for the sake of some other end. Meaning that people are only friends with one another because they both benefit from it. A friendship based off of pleasure is one where both people are attracted to one another based off of what they look like and who they are as a person.

They engulf us for a short period and then they fade... We cultivate a colleague in the field or a contact outside of it in the hope that it will advance our career or enhance out status. When it does, we feel a sence of personal success,” (May). He is addressing the two types of friendship of most common and most easily established. Friendships of pleasure are often short, because people take entertainment from one thing, then move on to the next when it becomes dull.

Since we have discussed the states of friendship and virtue in relationship to happiness, we must now examine the activities of friendship and virtue that make a happy life easier to attain. Aristotle claimed that of the goods in life “some are necessary conditions of happiness, while others are naturally useful and cooperative as instruments (1099b28-29).” He goes on further to exclaim that “having friends seems to be the greatest external good (1169b10-11).” Therefore this external good would be useful in attaining happiness. Friendship can be used as an instrument in performing virtuous actions necessary for happiness because “the solitary person’s life is hard, since it is not easy for him to be continually active all by himself; but in relation to others and in their company it is easier (1170a6-8).” Friends can also help us achieve happiness but guiding us to do virtuous acts, “for it is proper to good people to avoid error themselves and not to permit it in their friends

Firstly, Aristotle asserts friendships based on the love of virtue is the complete type of friendship, compared to two other types (122, section 6). The two other types of friendships are pleasure, and utility. However, he asserts these types of friendship are not lasting, because they are created for the sake of obtaining a good generated from their peer. Insofar the individuals in the relationship generate pleasure, or provide a service of utility to each other (121 section 2 line 15-17). Problematically, once that pleasure/utility has ceased, the friendship will likely dissolve since the advantageous goods have stopped being provided (122 section 2 line 15-17). He does propose that a friendship based on pleasure resembles the virtuous friendship, because the individuals in these relationships aim to be pleasant to each other (126, section 4). However, a friendship based on the goods an agent has to give is considered a lesser friendship, in comparison to the virtuous friendship. It is because the peer has a qualification that makes them desirable, but there is no mutual desire/awareness to generate goodwill for the

If friendship is made up of Aristotle’s three components, utility, mutual affirmation, and enjoyment of each other’s company, then friendship can be defined as a two-way relationship. The first component of friendship is utility. According to the article, “Rediscovering the joy of friendship” by C.W. Dawson Jr., it states, “The relationship is reciprocal: you can depend on them, and they can depend on you” (Dawson 3). If you can’t rely on a friend, then the trust shared by each other is diminished and the friendship is no longer mutual. The second component of friendship is mutual affirmation.

It takes two friends actively being friends to each other for the relational good of friendship to occur (Fowers, 2005). In real life there is no taking turns in “doing” friendship between friends because it is a shared good.

In the book Aristotle and the Philosophy of Friendship, (based off the Nicomachean Ethics) the author, Pangle, informed the audience that Aristotle believe in three different types of friendships based off three different types of motives: Friendships of Utility, Friendships of Pleasure, and Perfect Friendship. He identifies these types of friendships as different types of sources of affection that are lovable as the good, the pleasant, and the useful. Before analyzing Aristotle three types of friendships we must first understand what he meant by friendship. During Aristotle’s rein friendship was commonly known as the love one person had for another. Philia, brotherly love, was essential

“No one would choose a friendless existence on condition of having all the other things in the world (Aristotle).” Humans are social beings, social beyond any other creature in the world. Human interaction is a must for survival. It is in our nature. Aristotle understood this, he even had his own analysis of friendship. In the Nicomachean Ethics written by Aristotle, books VIII and IX are based off of friendship. Today, the definition of a friend is, “A person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically one exclusive of sexual or family relations (Oxford Dictionary).” To Aristotle, friendship is much more than this. In this research paper, I will evaluate whether or not Aristotle’s analysis of friendship is applicable to the modern world.

The pleasures gained from enjoying another’s company in a friendship vary in age, gender and, even more specifically, in individuals. Where a young child may experience a strong liking for his or her companion’s presence on multiple occasions, an adult will be content with one solid interaction. The transition from childhood to adulthood also alters the level of comfort one feels within a friendship. As one ages, one becomes more sensitive to the actions of those around them and will quickly eliminate a friend if his or her doings are not favored. (Doyle, Smith 5) This assessment is a clear indication of how Aristotle emphasizes the benefit of comfort in a relationship