When Leaving Is Not An Option

Domestic violence is a serious matter that needs to be dealt with immediately and if not, it can lead to much harm to the opposing partner and or their family’s life. This problem is affecting the lives of people in many ways because of this. When a person is abused, they lose their self-ego and dignity. It puts that person in fear of

Domestic violence is a devastating social problem. “Domestic violence is about one person getting and keeping power and control over another person in an intimate relationship. It is a pattern of behavior in which one intimate partner uses physical violence, coercion, threats, intimidation, isolation and emotional, sexual or economic abuse to control and change the behavior of the other partner (Despres,2009). Domestic violence is not just hitting or fighting or an occasional mean argument. It is a chronic abuse of power and a need for control. In every state there are laws that prohibit domestic violence but they vary from state to state. Domestic abuse is widespread and

Working with victims of domestic violence can be an extremely rewarding and fulfilling endeavor. One of the most crucial aspects for a paralegal working with victim of domestic violence is adequately engaging in the task of educating oneself to understand the commonalities of such victims and the ordeals that they have been through. Such clients are drastically different from other individuals who have suffered other physical and violent crimes. Understanding the background of someone who has lived through domestic violence is absolutely central to being able to provide adequate and sensitive legal care. Most victims of domestic violence are women (95%) though domestic violence can have an impact on ever age, class, race, ethnic, cultural or religious group (purplerainfoundation, 2012). "In the United States, nearly one in three adult women experience at least one physical assault by a partner during adulthood (American Psychological Association, Presidential Task Force on Violence and the Family 1996 Report)" (purplerainfoundation, 2012). These women are often terrified of their partner's temper, apologize when they are abused and often in the most extremely controlling and isolated environment where the abusive partner will control who the partner sees and where the partner goes outside of the home, jealous of outside relationships (purplerainfoundation, 2012). In these abusive relationships the women are hit,

Domestic violence, alternatively referred to as Intimate Partner Violence, is defined by the Department of Justice as “a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner.” While domestic violence is commonly thought of as only physical or sexual abuse, domestic violence can also be emotional, economic, or psychological. Domestic violence has remained constant in society throughout history, even though over time society’s response to the issue has changed. While domestic violence affects everyone regardless of race, gender, age, etc. it is estimated that approximately 90% of all victims are women. For the purpose of this paper, I will be focusing on

Many people are perplexed by the unwillingness of victims in abusive relationships to abandon the tumultuous environment, even when given an opportunity to escape. Outside of personal, subjective experience friends and family can learn why and how this helpless mentality develops and most importantly, ways in which they can help.

Domestic violence is an epidemic in our society with dramatic, negative effects on individuals, families and communities. Domestic violence is a crime that knows no economic, racial, ethnic, religious, age or gender limits. Women who are victims of domestic violence most likely are also victims of sexual assault and, stalking. A domestic violence victim may experience systematic rape in addition to physical and psychological abuse. According to Backman, (p.54) nearly one in every four women are beaten or raped by a partner during adulthood. Three women are killed by a current or former intimate partner each day in America, on average women are at an increased risk of harm shortly after separation from an abusive partner.

To begin with, Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) has been around for a very long time and it is still a present issue in the United States. There are many forms intimate partner violence such as, sexual, physical, emotional, and psychological. IPV occurs among all religious, socioeconomic, and cultural groups in the United States and other countries. As many people know intimate partner violence tends to come with consequences after the damage is done to the victim. Intimate partner violence does not just happen out of nowhere where the perpetrator thinks they have the right to be violent towards their spouse. The issue of IPV is connected to the cycle of violence in ways that it gives you an idea as to why the perpetrator thinks they have the right to hit the victim. In many cases not only do they think they have the right to due such thing but also feel like they have control over their spouse and have a mindset that they own them and will do anything just to keep them. Often the perpetrators feel guilty for being violent towards their loved ones that they come to a point of being apologetic and doing anything in their power to keep them. This author believes that intimate partner violence is a big issue and for many victims it is hard for them to escape the relationship. The victims go through so much in staying in the relationship that once they decide to definitely leave the relationship they end up suffering consequences and seeking available resources to

“Domestic violence is a type of abuse by one or both partners in marriage, friends, family, dating or cohabitation” (Aziz & Mahmoud, 2010). There are many forms of abuse from verbal and emotional to physical that often escalates over time in intensity for the victim. Data from the criminal justice system, hospital patient medical records and mental health records, police reports, surveys and social services reports of thousands of women revealed that many are injured and killed as a result of violence from someone close to them. “The US Office on Violence Against Women (OVW) defines domestic violence as a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over another intimate partner regardless of race, age, sexual orientation, religion, or gender” (Robertson & Murachver, 2009). Researchers and the criminal justice system have not been able to agree on a clear definition to domestic violence which can range from physical injury, stalking, verbal abuse and humiliation, denial of shelter and access to money, and intimidation through aggressive behaviors. The definition of domestic violence may vary but the results from physical injury, mental and emotional trauma, and sometimes even death can last a life time.

Women will continue to suffer from domestic violence unless there is some sort of intervention to help them. When dealing with this population, it is essential to create a safe environment where the woman can talk freely about the abuse without any retaliation from the abuser. When someone comes into a therapeutic session, everyone deserves to be treated with respect and care. This in turn will create a sense of hope that a different type of life can be possible. Also, knowing that there is a support system can help the woman begin the process of change. Despite this, the process of leaving the abusive partner is slow (Warshaw, n.d.)

Domestic violence is a very important social problem that we must educate ourselves on because it has such a profound and negative effect on the individual(s) being abused. They are affected mentally, emotionally, physically, and I know from experience that the scars can run very deep. Being in an abusive relationship for three years was devastating to my self-image as a teenager, and because of these feelings of inadequacy, my decreasing esteem allowed me to stay in such a dangerous scenario. Healing from the negative effects of that relationship has been a difficult journey for me, and I can only imagine how much more difficult it must be for women abused for years on end. To this day, I struggle greatly with the ability to let go of my own "control"

Every choice that an abused woman considers to do with regards in seeking help or ending the relationship involves a variety of risks. Time and time again, the common question arises, “why doesn’t she just leave?” Most often abused women, at great and potentially fatal risk, do leave their abusive relationships. However, there is a multitude of barriers, including increasing abuse and the potential for re-victimization by the system that does not respond accordingly, and most often force many women to return to their abusers. A woman may become vulnerable as she goes through the stages of leaving her abuser. There are many reasons why a woman becomes vulnerable; guilt, denial, and fear may be among a few reasons, though no matter what the

Some women take the position that “hope springs eternal” for people in love and they shouldn’t be held accountable for the abusive spousal choices they make. That is precisely the kind of romantic notion that men and women cling to and use to seduce them into staying in relationships in which there is abundant evidence that they should leave. Often friends and parents try to intervene but when “hope springs eternal” obvious dangers are overlooked, denied and women tell themselves something like, “If I just love him enough, he’ll change.” Battered men usually say exactly the same things. “What is needed in situations of verbal and physical abuse and danger is not romantic fantasy but a critical and self-protective assessment of the facts followed by a decision based on those facts”(Walker 17).

Domestic abuse is a startling issue in today’s society, and there are many different forms of it. Domestic abuse is defined as “the willful intimidation, physical assault, battery, sexual assault, and/or other abusive behavior as part of a systematic pattern of power and control perpetrated by one intimate partner against another” [1]. There are numerous forms of domestic abuse, including both physical and emotional violence. Many people who are trapped in these toxic relationships often feel helpless and worthless, and may think they have no way to escape their situation. However, with the right guidance and support, they can free themselves and emerge as a stronger person.

Every year in the United States, One in four women are victims of the domestic violence; however, this is only based on what has been reported to the department of justice (Stahly 2008). While men are also victims of domestic violence, women are more often the victims. Moreover, 90% of domestic violence is male initiated. In severe cases domestic violence ends with victims being murdered. More specifically, domestic violence resulted in 2,340 deaths in the United States in 2007, and 70% of those killed were females (CDC 2012). Many people think that victims have the option of leaving and many people blame victims for putting up with the abuse; what many people don 't know is, victims of domestic violence have many reasons preventing them from leaving their abusers, these reasons include, isolation, having children bounding them with the abuser and lack of financial support. "It 's never pretty when you leave an abusive and controlling relationship. The warden always protests when a prison gets shut down," says Dr. Steve Maraboli (qtd from web). Whether a victim stays or leaves their abuser, the outcomes of both situations are not always as easy as many people predict. In some situations, the outcomes of leaving may be very dangerous for both the victim and her children.

“Every year in the United States there are over 3 million incidents of domestic violence. That means that every nine seconds a women is beaten by her domestic partner” (Findeley). There are many women that stay silent when being abuse by their partners. The consequences of staying quiet when obtaining abuse can be dangerous and can also lead to death. Many women do not recognize the importance of the fact that there is in speaking out if they are being abuse by their partner. No woman should take domestic abuse by their partners. Every woman deserves a healthy relationship; A healthy relationship involves trust, respect, and consideration for the other person. Domestic abuse has gotten worse during the past years and is still rising up. One can see that domestic abuse can occur everywhere. Domestic abuse is considered a crime and woman should not keep silent when being abuse.