Why Don T We Listen Better Summary

In a country as racially diverse as the United States of America, it is certain that there is tension amongst those of different races. While most minorities have fought long and hard to earn acceptance and equality from others, Native Americans have not reached that level of unity yet. In fact, in “We Talk, You Listen ,” Vine Deloria Jr. argues that there is a movement toward minority inclusion, but it has come at an expense of dehumanizing racial groups like Native Americans. For instance, Deloria states that in war movies, Indians have only appeared under white men to send secret messages using a language that the enemy would not be able to understand, meaning that “it was the strangeness of Indians that made the visible, not their humanity”

Listening is a very complicated skill that many people do not posses. It requires individuals to reflect and to admit to their flaws. In order to communicate effectively it is important to know when to talk and listen. Peterson’s book is an excellent tool to enhance all types of relationships.

I know how to speak, and I can hear when people talk to me, but why is it that we still consume ineffective listening skills between one another? When we think of effective listening at work or on the job, most of us think of what we actually say or what is said to us. What I am going to cover is the factors and barriers of effective communication, strategies for active, critical and empathic listening and understanding the impact of gender and culture on interpersonal communication.

When someone speaks we need to listen. That means pay attention to what the other is saying and truly understand what is being spoken. If we are not good listeners, than we are not able to have that cclose realationship with the other person.

In the article of The Skill of Mindful listening, Hennessey teaches us the difficulties of effective communications in today’s society. His first focus in the article was based around how we are almost disconnected from one another and the outside world. How sometimes it can seem challenging for people to communicate with one another because we feel that we must compete with the others phone first. Hennessey reminds us that being mindful is not only just being open minded of what the other person is saying, but to also be giving our full attention to them. Listening is a mind and a body skill; that listening involves all of our senses and gives information to both parties. Hennessey also reminds us to not be judgemental when it come to listening to another person and that you need to be patient and listen to the full story before you engage in judging. As I read more and more from Hennessey about

In the book of “Why dont we listen better?” by James C. Peterson, he provides the readers with a strategic understanding of listening and how executing the skill can significantly impact your social life. While reading this book, I noticed a lot of repetition stated by Mr. Peterson, a method in which I found to be very interesting and helpful. Alongside of repetition, he also introduced various methods used to effectively communicate with each other separated into five sections. Part One: Options in Communicating, Part Two: The Talker-Listener Process, Part Three: The Listening Techniques, Part Four: Using the TLC in groups, and Part Five: Concluding Philosophy.

Being an excellent listener is one of the best ways to become a good communicator. Throughout the group work, the author demonstrated great communication skills when listening to her team’s different ideas and then taking them on board to create the best results. Fellow team members will appreciate good listening skills, and so in return, it will have a positive impact to the group’s mood, and encouraging them to be confident to speak up and say their thoughts as they know their ideas are being listened too.

In no way it can ignore the card that comes with the book which he has called the Talker, Listener card (TLC) that somehow “…facilitates a good talking-turns system in communication.” (Petersen, 2007, p. 8) This not only makes the communication being more successful, but on the other hand leads to understand much better the complex process of listening, and meeting each of their goals.

I personally, have to first accept that I too am not perfect; my past and current methods of communication and listening skills have not worked, and I need to be more open in order to welcome change. One important step that can be made involves common courtesy; do not speak when someone else is speaking! This is something that was taught during early stages of development, yet it is often ignored during adulthood because of a false sense of entitlement that ones’ opinions are more important, and that is not true. As Petersen (2007) has stated throughout his book, there is often a sense of urgency or a need to solve problems or interject solution even when it is not required or asked. The idea that another person may only be seeking a listening ear is bypassed completely. Moving forward, I think it is essential that I create my own TLC (talker-listener card) that I can take with me and use as a stepping stone to changing my flawed listening and communication skills. Because I am a visual learner, this will work perfectly in helping me stay focus on my role in the conversation. Whenever I feel the need to interject my opinions, I can look down at the card and acknowledge if it is my turn to speak and even if it is remember what my duties are; if the problem was not mines to begin with then my job is not to solve it but rather be an effective listener in order to help the other person develop their own

Why Don’t We Listen Better? is a book that I initially did not think I would enjoy reading or learn from. Contrarily, I have learned more about myself than I could have ever imagined. To begin, to summarize the book was a bit difficult because there were so many interesting and important aspects. It was not an easy task to decide what to add and what to omit. James Petersen sought out to explore and dissect communication and understanding within different types and levels of relationships. Petersen described the Flat Brain Theory of Emotions as a theory that describes

Such as the two levels of communication, which are the following: level one deal with information being exchanged and received during the discussion that lacks depth which leads to disconnection; level two of communication deals with connection surrounding emotions which bring the person into a deeper intimate relationship with others, (Peterson, 2015, p 12-13). Also during this part he explains how one’s stomach, heart, and head impacts the effectiveness of communication at the basic level due to one’s emotional state overtaking one’s logical process during communication, which is referred to as the Flat-Brain Theory/Syndrome (Peterson, 2015, p 19-26). Peterson’s (2015) second part describes his process of overcoming the Flat-Brain Syndrome through the process of the Talker-Listener Card (TLC), which helps the reader to learn the correct roles of the talker and the listener, which builds better listening skills and allows each person to be heard (p 69-88). Through part one and part two Peterson (2015) provides various techniques skills that one need to have within their interpersonal communications to be a better

James Petersen’s book Why Don’t We Listen Better, is a true guide in making relationships better with better communication. This book does not just help people communicate better in a work environment such as ministry or a counseling setting, but in everyday interactions with people and relationships. Petersen discusses the Flat Brain Theory and Flat Brain Tango, which shows why people have problems/ issues concerning listening to each other.

Communication is an ongoing process in which individuals exchange messages whose meanings are influenced by the history of the relationship and the experiences of the participants. (Adler, p.384) Communication depends on relationships between the people who are communicating, and on common basics between them. Problems in communications between people may arise due to differences in cultures, perceptions, values, and expectations from life.

Communication is the imparting, conveying, or exchanging of information via spoken or written words, sounds, or visual symbols. Knowing how to effectively communicate is essential in both personal and professional settings. The more we practice our communication skills, the more we are able to easily and efficiently get along with others and express our thoughts and ideas. Good communication skills promote professional success by enabling us to effectively relay messages to clients as well as develop positive relationships with co-workers. An important component of proper communication is good listening, which allows us to better comprehend the environment around us, understand the issues, and resolve problems caused by ineffective communication. The way we communicate is divided into five general pathways. These pathways include Professional Communication in Small Groups, Public Discourse, Communication in Human Relationships, Visual and Mediated Communication, and Communication in Art and Culture. Professional communication involves skills in the workplace and with small groups of co-workers or clients. Public discourse involves persuasive messages such as public speaking, argument and debate, and politics. Communication in human relationships focuses on conversation, communication and gender, communication in marital and family relationships, and nonverbal communication. Visual and mediated communication provides approaches to communication in technology such as film,

For communication to be successful it has to be understood by the receiver and the ability to be replied to. This means that overall communication include speaking, reading, and listening skills. As communications moves from the author to the receiver, there is more than enough opportunity for its genuine meaning to become different or altered. For that reason, listening, reasoning and