Why Forgiveness Should Be Both Ways

After 3 months of marriage, his true self began to show. He would not hold a job, the mental, physical and verbal abuse, his alcoholism and infidelity. I began to move back home. By time the first car payment was due he did not have the money to make it and had the nerve to call and ask my mother to borrow the money. By that time I had packed

I am your wife, even though you chose to have an affair, I still strongly believe that you care about my well-being. This marriage isn’t over and needs work, but I believe with determination and faith we can restore this. Talking to me is one of the things that we can both do to strengthen our relationship. Moving past your mistakes and seeing what went wrong and fixed it might just be the solution. I understand though if you no longer desire to be with me. In the hope that, you will read this letter and its points about standing up and doing the right thing you will decide to tell the truth about Abigail and what she’s doing.

Everyone always wonders how to cope with guilt. It may not be the simplest thing in the world, but it also is not the hardest thing. One of the first steps in coping with guilt is confessing, whether it is to a friend, family member, or someone in a church. After you admit what you did wrong, you are on your way to recovering from all of the guilt weighing on your mind. One of the next steps in coping with guilt is to "make amends or changes sooner rather than later," ("5 Tips for Dealing with Guilt.") because you still have a slight chance of restoring any relationship that was damaged in the process. You must also realize and "accept that you cannot change the past." What's done is done, but you can only go forward from that point on. It is better to take one small step forward than to take three steps

Whether you have been married twenty years or have just been dating for several months, your relationship is not immune to serious problems (Baby Please Don’t Go, p.1). No relationship can be devoid of problems because there exists no such thing as a perfect relationship. Relationships revolve around human nature, the depths of which can never be calculated (Borkar, 2010, p.1). Even the best couples run into relationship problems once in a while. Conflict is part of the human tapestry that we all deal with at one time or another (Warta, 2008, p.1). Relationship problems are nothing but a few

They (your husband/wife) understand the repercussions of bringing this emotional affair out in the open. You may have heard your spouse talk about the other person in an innocent manner, but later quit speaking to you about them completely. Values such as transparency in your marriage, have now been thrown out the window. Things like greater honesty and transparency must be incorporated, if there is to be emotional affair recovery.

After re-reading some of my journal entries, I realized that I had documented him and his best friend leaving for 2 months straight, every Saturday, to help others like his brother, his sister, his other brother, his other brother, his best friend, his best friend’s mom, his best friend’s grandpa, his cousin, etc. Moreover, my journal was ultimately a huge assistance with my realization that our relationship was not getting any better. Furthermore, my journal turned out to be records of countless betrayals and dysfunctions that occurred throughout my marriage. Oftentimes, “When the people we love or with whom we have a deep connection stop caring, stop paying attention, stop investing and fighting for the relationship, trust begins to slip away and hurt starts seeping in”, we begin to feel betrayed (Rankin M.D., 2012). Which I definitely felt when my husband was constantly aiding others. The emotional pain and suffering that I allowed him to impart upon me is unacceptable. My husband leaving with his best friend was just a minor betrayal that I endured while we were married. There were many things that I let him get away with, and it is all because I used to believe, “No matter what happens, the person you love and trust will care about your well being and never intentionally hurt you”

Thanks for the quick response. Sorry to hear that you and the wife are going through tough times together but it is expected to go through tough times for the first three years after getting married. This is where both you will find out what each other is made of and who is the one really trying to make things work in the marriage. You or her! If after three years you and the wife still going through the same old issues then the marriage meant not to be for neither one. Keep this in mind! Just continue working it and always do your best in the marriage. That is the best advice I can tell you.

Commercial break... I made the decision to leave my husband because while I worked hard to ensure we had the lifestyle we always dreamt of, he took on the profession of "serial cheater." As a mother, of 2 girls, I never wanted my daughters to think it was okay to be the provider, while your husband created chaos in the household.

She says doing things to rebuild your self worth, things like doing things you love, being around people who support you. But she says the most important thing is to stop the mind from wanting to know the details, this can be the hardest. Not asking questions such as where did it happen, how often did it happen, what was it like, these questions can only inflict more pain, but rather to ask question that reflect on the affair as a lesson such as, what made you do it, how did you feel when you’d come home at night or are you happy it’s over? Finally she ends with the quote she tells all the couples who come to her for help after an affair “Your first marriage is over, would you like to start a second one together?” And I think this is beautiful because it reminds us that healing is possible but it also teaches us that we cant just move on from affairs, working them out is hard work and it requires starting from

3. If your spouse has done something to betray your trust, it is important that you openly discuss the issue with them. It is always best to learn why your spouse made the decision that they did, and to really consider their position on the situation. It is also important to share your feelings and position on the complication in the relationship that resulted in the loss of trust.

For a solid year I fought like hell to save our marriage and save our family... everything we had worked so hard to build together. But, when your husband tells you that he would rather start over with someone else than put anymore effort into the marriage, I don't know where you really go from there. It's a dark day when your husband tells you you're not worth fighting for. But, I took it all on with words and actions hoping and praying that we could get through the darkness and be better and stronger for going through it. I knew what changes needed to be made. I had already acknowledged this to him and began making some changes to myself back during the summer before I knew anything about divorce, only a sense that something was really not right. I could see the light on the other side and I pleaded with him to choose us... choose our

When it comes to marriage it is not as easy as it may seem. There is such a high rate of divorce in the world now that it actually scares people out of wanting to get married. What many people do not realize about divorce is that it effects the kids involved as well as the adults. It is hard to know what it is causing your own marriage to go badly, but sometimes therapy can be a useful resource to prevent divorce and reconnect with your partner. Married couples should be required to go to counseling and try everything they can to save the marriage before filing for divorce.

Your marital status has changed, and along with it, several other changes are to be expected, and there isn't any change that will make your past disappear, so accept things for what they are, good or bad, learn from them if you can and move on under any name.

Even looking back on the relationship I still can confidently say we communicated very well in the early stages of the relationship. I felt comfortable communicating with him about small conflicts or any of my wants and needs and I truly believe he felt the same way. Our communication didn’t seem to be an issue until after the first cheating incident. I think that this is because up until the cheating incident I had no reason to suspect he was not telling me things and I never felt a secretive or flighty vibe from him. After being cheated on I can admit that my communication skills with him started to change. Within one day everything had changed. I had not fallen out of love but instead of a sincere love it felt more like a constant sting to the heart whenever I thought of what he had done to me. I found myself bouncing back in forth between emotions of extreme hurt, anger, and self pity.

Although there is no excuse for lying or cheating, understand why men lie could be your first step to healing from