Why I Am A Mother

I feel like my parents have made many mistakes in my early childhood years and those are things that have shaped not only them, but also me. Those critical times were my learning experiences of what was a positive or negative action from just being the observer. I sometimes have a tough time loving them for those actions,

Before becoming a parent, I was unaware of all that I had to learn. It’s funny but new parents do not yet know what they do not know. I had no comprehension of everything that being a parent would demand. I always thought that being a parent would be so easy since my parents were the best.

Ever since I was little and did not know how to do basic things like walk, talk or solve an algebraic equation. Naturally I would get discouraged and would not try to do it again. However, my parents effortlessly raised me, had encourage me to keep going. That I would get what I wanted if I put my heart into it. I’m not spoiled like Simon sinek would say we were raised with bad parenting skills.; my parents did not argue with my teachers over a stupid grade or to force me intro honors class room.

I was a young lady whom learned to be a mother to a beautiful girl at an early stage of my life. I made mistakes, but the mistake help me grow into becoming the mother figure you needed in your life.

     Let me go back up and say that my dad was not perfect by any means. He was a hard worker and a good provider and he loved my mother and us. But he also allowed my mother to always be in control of the household, the finances and the discipline. My mother resented him for this and when things went wrong she wanted to blame him for his lack of input.

Alison Bechdel’s memoir, Are You My Mother?: A Comic Drama, focuses on Alison and her relationship with her mother. Her relationship with her mother affects the way she relates to people, especially her mother. Bechdel begins this portrayal of Alison’s relationship with her mother on the cover of the book. The red, wood-like background of the cover of the book, is behind all of the other objects. This background is most likely a desk or table of some sort with several objects sitting on top of it. Firstly, I notice the mirror. Mirrors are typically seen as a symbol of self-indulgence and vainness. The mirror is golden and the title of the book, Are You My Mother? is placed in the mirror itself. Secondly, I see the red beaded necklace. The beads are not completely on the book cover. Beads, jewelry, and the color red are often seen as signs of affluence and richness. Next, I see the black and white picture. What appears to be two females are present in the picture. One is older than the other. The woman in the picture looks like she is sitting and appears to be smoking and reading some sort of book, magazine, or newspaper. There is a girl off to the left side of the woman in the picture, clasping her hands, smiling, and watching the woman from a distance. Finally, I notice the lipstick on the cover. The lipstick is in a white container with a gold band. I can clearly see that it is a red shade of lipstick. Again, red lipstick is usually seen worn on someone of importance.

Throughout my entire life, my parents have always trusted me to let them know when something is up. They have emphasized success in school and never let me get too far behind. I have always felt loved and I know that my parents trust me to do what is best. Also, I have been happy with how my life has gone and where is will be going. Unfortunately, not everyone can say the same thing. Not all kids have parents that are alive or are involved in their lives. Your parents are the people that shape you into the person you are now. There are many different ways to parent, and there isn’t necessarily a “right” way. However, many future parents get hung up on the best way to make sure your kid isn’t a screw-up. In actuality, parents just need to make sure that their child feels happy, trusted, and loved.

As I entered my teen years, my father expected more out of me than just being a good student. Dad always seemed to have projects going on around the house, and I became his helper. It did not matter what the project was, he always seemed to need my help and I was not happy about that. I had better things to do than wasting a weekend working around the house. Somehow my dad knew how to do everything and felt it was his job to teach all of it to me. I was a teenager and had all of the knowledge I would ever need, so I thought. As it turned out, most of the skills I obtained helping my father led me to a rather lucrative career in manufacturing a few years later.

In the short time that I have been a mother I have learned many things. I have realized that every day is a learning experience. I have taken the mistakes that I have made and learned from them. My children have pushed me to strive for

I was praised when I needed to be praised, and scolded when I needed to be. This is a process that shapes a good child. For example, if a child threw their trash away, they might get a piece of candy. When they said a naughty word, they might have to go to time out. My parents taught me these lessons, but in a more optimistic way. Focusing on the bright side, even in a bad situation. This brought a lot of positivity to my life, threw an optimistic way. It helps me as an older child to not be frustrated as much. Jimmy Dean once said “ I can't change the direction of the wind, but i can adjust my sails to always reach my destination.” This quote reminds me of the life lessons i was taught. If one solution doesn't work, try

David Michael Kaplan Another postcard from you today, Mother, and I see by the blurred postmark that you're in Manning, North Dakota now and that you've dated the card 1961. In your last card you were in Nebraska, and it was 1962; you've lost some time, I see. I was a little girl, nine years old, in 1961. You'd left my father and me only two years before. Four months after leaving, you sent me—always me, never him—your first postcard, of a turnpike in the Midwest, postmarked Enid, Oklahoma. You called me "My little angel" and said that the sunflowers by the side of the road were tall and very pretty. You signed it, as you always have, "Your only mother." My father thought, of course, that you were in Enid, and he

First, motherhood has provided me with perspective. I have learned to work together as a team with my husband as we raise our three children. I have learned patience and selflessness as I have put the needs of my children before my own. I know how to budget my time, multi-task, and organize my schedule efficiently. I have learned to set boundaries and enforce

My mother was my primary caregiver throughout all of my childhood. While my father was in the picture for a majority of my childhood, he was also a severe alcoholic which greatly impacted my upbringing. My rules, obligations, and expectations were not always set in stone and did often depend on the time, situation, and/or mood of my parents. I think it is normal for parents to differ slightly in their parenting styles occasionally. As a young kid I remember my sister and I being very aware that the mood my mother was in greatly contributed to the outcome of a question or event. I think most, if not all of us can relate to this. Overall however, I would say that my mother had an authoritative parenting style. My mother made is very clear that she was the parent and in charge, however she was welcoming and understanding enough that I felt comfortable coming to her with questions or problems. My mom was also very encouraging and supportive. She always pushed me to do my best but never made me feel bad if I did not reach my goals. I was lucky to have such a great relationship with my mom, not everyone does. As a young teenager I had many friends who would come to me with questions and concerns because they knew my mom was so open-minded and understanding. My mom was always my parent first and my friend second. I knew what was expected of me and I was disciplined for bad behavior, however I always knew I could go to her with anything I needed.

Many different aspects of life characterize motherhood. Traditions along with society influence the role of motherhood. Carol Stacks' "All our Kin," is an essay about the "structuring of kin groups" (1974, p.47). In the society, if the mother is not mature enough to raise the child, a close female relative takes on the role of the mother; whereas, the man has the option of choosing to claim the child and take on the responsibilities of fatherhood or he can imply that the father could be anyone, which is a socially acceptable reason. Ruth Horowitz' "The Expanded Family and Family Honor," portrays a Mexican Family as a "nuclear family unit" within an "expanded family" (1983, p.64). After marriage, motherhood is an expected

Third, my parents’ parenting style influenced strongly what I am now. They had democratic parenting style. Therefore, I could discuss with my parents even something which they did not want me to do. Also, they set some reasonable rules which I should follow, and whenever they made rules they explained me why they made such rules. They advised me when I was depressed; however, they have never forced me what to do. Throughout my experience with my parents, I could understand the importance of independence and taking responsibility of my choice. Also, because they did not force their opinions, I could develop my own identity without many conflicts.